Parents of The Coli, be real, have kids ruined your life?

[sanityovar8ted]

From @Giselle talking about LSA

thats disturbing to say the least

 

[IllustratorMike]

You get the right dikk up in you and you'll forget everything you even typed here...

 

[RiffRaff]

This thread was made on lsa, and a good amount of them said that they wished they would have had them later, or with a differnt person, and some regret having kids period.
http://www.lipstickalley.com/showthread.php/828521-Do-any-of-you-regret-having-children?highlight=regret kids thread

That was hard to read.

I can't stand piece of shyt people.

I don't care how much that shyt is eating you up inside, pretend for at least 18 years to love the creation YOU brought in the world. The people in this world disgust me sometimes.

 

[Ashley Banks]

don't encourage him

 

[SemiEnlightenedBum]

We see dis question asked all da time

its pointless to ask though bruh

You gona get da same replies "i wont trade ma babies fo nothin!"

We are humans bruh. We are wired with a parental instinct stronger than any other living creature in the world.

Once we have a mini-me our complete psyche changes like a flip gets switched or some shyt, and its damn near impossible to 'look back' or to imagine life w/o ya seeds . We programmed that way as humans. Parental instinct

Its pointless to ask a human parent do they think their kids have ruined their lives

Somethin blocks our brains from even bein able to fathom dat shyt once we become parents. And im glad we built like dat

guess you ain't never been to the hood..

 

[Fun Sized Psycho]

Man if a message board could convince her to abort and have her crying on the floor......... maybe it was for the better

That place is misery tho, no doubt about it

At least here we have other subforums.... we set trends.... over there everything is just fukking misery

I don't know if they u read either thread or not but the thread starter said she didn't want to be a mother.
Do you think a woman that doesn't want to be a mother will be a good mother??

eta: and there's a bunch of subforums there as well

 

[beenz]

She approaching that age fam .... be cautious

my cocnealed carry card will be here within 2 weeks

 

[beenz]

From @Giselle talking about LSA

at someone making life altering decisions based on the hoes at LSA.

 

[RiffRaff]

The crazy part of that Lipstick Alley thread is that the VAST majority of the women who regret having children are single and regret who they had their children with. Not all, but the majority of those who weren't bitter also happened to be married. Yet you will still have people still swear up and down that they're ok being a single parent. If you're having children the goal should be doing so in a two parent household. Literally everyone is better off from this; you, the children, the community, everyone. Why do people still try to force these broken homes on us like it's A ok in 2015 baffles me.
Stop fukking with people who are no good if it leads to creation of another being. You will just continue a cycle of perpetual animosity towards a family unit.

 

[TheSpook]

The problem is the wife/bm not the kids.

 

[aXiom]

http://www.lipstickalley.com/showth...-having-children?highlight=regret+kids+thread

They got subforum called Family Counseling

I don't regret it, per se, but IF I had known the life of suffering my son would have to endure, I would have terminated the pregnancy.

I had a major car accident at 5 months pregnant (a truck ran a light going 60+ mph and T-boned me) and my son was born "normal" (9 on the Apgar test).

At 7 months he had his first emergency brain surgery (for hydrocephalus). His condition is either hereditary OR caused by blunt force trauma. We had all the genetic testing done and it was attributed to the accident.

He has since had 7 additional brain surgeries.

He is profoundly autistic. Doesn't speak. Was only just potty trained as of September (he's 11) and has the cognitive ability of a toddler.

I worry EVERY SINGLE DAY what will happen to him when my husband and I are gone. I worry that he will be taken advantage of or abused.

So, while I don't regret having him, had I known what his life would be like - I would not have had him.

Thread is sad as fukk








I have an ungodly amount of me time that I fukkING LOVE and get easily agitated if anyone fukks it up for reasons deemed not worthy. That's what probably scares me the most about having kids. However, I'd love to build something great with a great female, but I'm scared of putting that much energy and time into something that could go south in a heartbeat for any number of reasons.. especially considering the shyt some of my boys done been through with females

 

[onelastdeath]

Can't even go to a bar without finding a sitter

 

[Raava]

Honest answer: Before he was here, I felt that way. I wouldn't even say he did, I blamed boyfriend and myself. I was very depressed. After he was born, I wouldn't say ruined at all. It definitely changed it and also made somethings harder. But he really did make me a better person. He really is a good kid (blessed with no birth defects) and once he got here I couldn't even remember what it was like before. Not saying I have never been frustrated but far from ruined.

My situation is different though. I have 2 (2 1/2 -3 depending on how it falls) free weeks out of every month. His father and I share custody (never been to court) . I have more freedom than most parents and definity most mothers. I have a lot of "me time". I also have a very good support system and his father is a great dad. If one parent needs time or something we just call each other. We aren't perfect, we have had fights, I have wanted to kill him and vice versa but overall I say we are lucky to have the other as co-parent.

I have thought about what if I had a time machine, and I am very very honest with myself. It is always go back and change something after he was born.

 

[Grams]

When I got pregnant with my son I told his father I was going to have an abortion and wasn't ready for one. The father has custody and my son sees me on weekends, now my son has been saying he wants to live with me and I really don't want him moving in fukking up my flow. He's a teenager now, and I don't want to live with full time with a kid I never even wanted. The only reason I had him was because his dad said he would take care of everything. I've also gotten mad and told my son he's lucky I didn't get an abortion like I really wanted to do.

My mom and dad always told me that children are dream killers

My mom tells my sister and I that she regrets having us about once a week. Its always the same old "having children was the biggest mistake of my life" bullshyt. But then again me n Mi sister are pretty lazy around the house sooo....... -_- (oh n she likes to spoil us a lot)

I have 3 children. I had the first 2 early..I was 21yrs old for my first and then had my second 22mos later. It was very hard to bond with my first born due to postpartum depression but it was a bit easier the second time around, but I was still very young and didn't feel motherly at all.

Fast forward to when I was 28 (turning 29) and we had our 3rd child. It was COMPLETELY different. I have a totally different bond with my youngest and I feel motherly towards her. I know it sounds like I'm a piece of shyt but I have yet to feel that same bond with my oldest 2. I don't know if it's because when I had the youngest I was way older and more mature or what, but I connect and love the youngest more than I do the others. I admit it to myself and I've even told my husband this. It's horrible..I know but it's my truth.

My own mother treated me like crap growing up. She never showed affection or love towards me and would say mean shyt to me and I felt like she resented me and I hate that I feel like I'm becoming her and repeating the cycle with my oldest 2. If I could go back and just have the other 2 later on like I did with my last, maybe things would be different. I know they feel that I don't have a deep connection with them and I don't want them hating me when they get older for "favoring" the youngest and not bonding with them, but I really try but it's just not naturally there and it feels forced. I question myself and wonder how as a mother do I not naturally feel maternal towards the first 2 but its like a breeze with my last. Thank goodness for my husband because he is the best father and definitely genuinely gives all 3 of our kids the love and attention they deserve where I lack. I'm definitely working on myself for my children though because I don't want them to feel for me like I do my mom.

I use to never like abortion and honestly use to silently judge others that do it but over the years I've been moving more pro-choice. Like others have said, so many people have children now and aren't ready. I'm not even talking about teen pregnancy (financial realm) but i've seen grown ass people speak/do some of the most hateful things to their kids.

For example, I was with my homegirl one day and she was dropping her son with the dad. This little boy is 2, his dad took him out the car and put him on the ground. He didn't want to walk anywhere until his mama came with him. This !!!!! told him "Either you come on or imma punch you in your shyt". He still stood there and so his dad yanked the hell out of him by his arm picking him up crying, then talking mess the entire way into the house. I asked my homegirl did she see that and she said, "I've never seen bruises and he pays child support, so it's not a big deal". Her and I are still cordial but after seeing that I couldn't be around her like that.

Hell even my own mother use to tell me how I disgusted her over stuff so little as my dad was making dinner and we had ate at the mall. She told me not to say anything to him but it slipped out. I guess he got upset and said "oh I didn't need to cook then", she started screaming saying how "She couldn't stand me and I disgusted her" mind you I was 10. Then when I was 17, we were joking around and I noticed that my birthday would of made me conceived on Valentines day (November 22, so add 9 months plus 8 days for conception). This bytch told me, "Don't act so happy, you're daddy begged for you".

I have children of my own now and I won't lie, I view them as Gods greatest gifts to me and would never fix my mouth or actions to show different because they didn't ask to be here, my actions did. It's makes me think, why the hell did you have them in the first place? Their are people out here who prayed for them like myself while others continue to conceive but act like they are the most vile thing walking.

I know a family who live near by who are similar. There's 3 boys and 1 girl, the mother constantly insults the girl & calls her ugly because she is dark skinned and "not attractive". She felt like it was shameful to have a daughter that is "ugly". They all used to go to the same school as me, one of the boys was the same age as me and in my class. The girl wouldn't even be seen playing outside like everyone else & her siblings (we were 8-9 years old then). Her mother literally shut her inside the house because she didn't want anyone to see her. Also, she used to tell new people that she wasn't her daughter and was just a relative or would just say she has 3 sons only.

When she was 13, she ran away & her grandma took her in to look after her. The mum threatened the grandma that she would cut her off and never speak to her again if she didn't kick the girl out.

I regret it big time. I miss my freedom and 'me' time. It seems like everything I do revolves around him. I love my son but I wish I never had a child.

I regret it! Sorry, I do! I miss my old life and I realized I am just not into the mommy thing. It's a struggle everyday to show that I would rather be anywhere else than with my kid.

my mother always tells me how much my exiestence has got in her way..from keeping a man, or luxury car or the career of her choice.. how her life stopped at 37 (eye roll). i use to want kids but i don't think i will be a good mother. i'm too fukked up and i can't promise that i will love them unconditionally..my mother has given my all the reasons i need to never reproduce.. i now view children as burdens, because its how i see myself...also because i have nothing good to offer them, i'm not pretty or smart or rich, all things important if you want to succeed in this world...and because i dislike myself so much, i'm afraid to see myself in someone else.

Bruh! I was at a baby shower for a friend of mine when we were in our late teens/early 20s, and this woman was asking me and a mutual friend of the pregnant one why we didn't tell her to not have kids. She sounded like she was soooooo against it, and her daughter was RIGHT BESIDE HER! Maybe she was saying that my friend was too young (I've made it to 25 with nokids. Praise!), but I side eyed her ass. haha

 

[Schmoove]

Are they expensive