Parents saying things you don't want to hear unappreciation thread.

[Shadow King]

I read my father's dirty texts to my mother if it makes you feel better...

I hate that shyt, so I just troll my way out of the situations. Actual phone phone convo with my mother from last weekend

Spoiler

Mom: "Why don't you ever answer your phone when I call"

Me: "I just answered"

Mom: "What are you doing the rest of the times."

Me: "I'm probably out or busy"

Mom: "That's why you have a cell-phone, smart-ass"

Me: " Well idk, maybe I'm retarded"




Then out of nowhere......................


Mom: "Are you using protection with these girls, Day (my nickname) ?"

Me: "What? Ma, I'm not about to talk to you about this........but if you must know, I'm untouched. Pure as the driven snow"

Mom: "I'm being serious, boy, stop playing"

Me: *sigh* "Protection won't do me any good now because I already got a son on the way...... But I did get a vasectomy, so it won't happen again. Don't be mad, I was going to tell you around Thanksgiving"

Mom: "Blah blah blah blah"

Me: :yamad: "Please Theresa, don't be mad at me, I'm your only son"

Her: "You know what, just answer the phone when I call in case it's an emergency"

Me: "Most certainly, my dear"

 

[86\*/98]

I remember I skipped school one day back in 9th grade. My mother was working night shifts at the time and as long as I got out the crib before 8-8:30, she'd have no idea I wasn't in school. This time she came home early, and was unlocking the door just as I started to reach for it. I ran and hid under my bed. At this point, I'm a little flustered but not really tripping, thinking that she's tired and about to go right to sleep....

Her homegirl calls and they get to chatting; I have my door open so I hear everything. Almost IfukkINGMMEDIATELY the conversation turned demonic.

I went to my cousins house for the weekend a couple of days before, and apparently she took that opportunity to have a sex romp at the crib, with my step-dad, who was just her boyfriend at the time. She was being descriptive to the point of me thinking I was being trolled. When she finally did get of the phone and go to sleep, I left and smoked most of the weed I was planning to sell, while I contemplated never going back home. That was a bad day for me.


I'm not going into details but they both some freaks, and I haven't eaten a damn thing off of one of her plates, to this day.

"Nah I'm good, mom; I don't want the rest of your shrimp fried rice"




*You fukking freak*

 

[Chill]

I remember I skipped school one day back in 9th grade. My mother was working night shifts at the time and as long as I got out the crib before 8-8:30, she'd have no idea I wasn't in school. This time she came home early, and was unlocking the door just as I started to reach for it. I ran and hid under my bed. At this point, I'm a little flustered but not really tripping, thinking that she's tired and about to go right to sleep....

Her homegirl calls and they get to chatting; I have my door open so I hear everything. Almost IfukkINGMMEDIATELY the conversation turned demonic.

I went to my cousins house for the weekend a couple of days before, and apparently she took that opportunity to have a sex romp at the crib, with my step-dad, who was just her boyfriend at the time. She was being descriptive to the point of me thinking I was being trolled. When she finally did get of the phone and go to sleep, I left and smoked most of the weed I was planning to sell, while I contemplated never going back home. That was a bad day for me.


I'm not going into details but they both some freaks, and I haven't eaten a damn thing off of one of her plates, to this day.

"Nah I'm good, mom; I don't want the rest of your shrimp fried rice"




*You fukking freak*

Even the dinner plates got involved?

 

[86\*/98]

Even the dinner plates got involved?

No, she didn't say anything about them using dinner plates, although I wouldn't be surprised.

Like I said, she was very descriptive, and some of the acts she described have led me to not want my mouth anywhere near, where her mouth has just been. That includes plates, forks, cups, bottles, etc.

 

[Wild self]

Idk if it's so much of hearing shyt but I can't watch movies that have sex scenes in them with my parents.

I think I was watching Monsters Ball with my mom and step dad- sex scene came up and mom and step dad said "god damn!!! " In unison.

That made me pretty uncomfortable

shyt like that is why I can't even watch PG-13 or R rated films with my moms. Even if there is no sex scene, if there is a bad bytch on screen, shyt makes me feel MAD uncomfortable.

 

[Boogie]

I remember I skipped school one day back in 9th grade. My mother was working night shifts at the time and as long as I got out the crib before 8-8:30, she'd have no idea I wasn't in school. This time she came home early, and was unlocking the door just as I started to reach for it. I ran and hid under my bed. At this point, I'm a little flustered but not really tripping, thinking that she's tired and about to go right to sleep....

Her homegirl calls and they get to chatting; I have my door open so I hear everything. Almost IfukkINGMMEDIATELY the conversation turned demonic.

I went to my cousins house for the weekend a couple of days before, and apparently she took that opportunity to have a sex romp at the crib, with my step-dad, who was just her boyfriend at the time. She was being descriptive to the point of me thinking I was being trolled. When she finally did get of the phone and go to sleep, I left and smoked most of the weed I was planning to sell, while I contemplated never going back home. That was a bad day for me.


I'm not going into details but they both some freaks, and I haven't eaten a damn thing off of one of her plates, to this day.

"Nah I'm good, mom; I don't want the rest of your shrimp fried rice"




*You fukking freak*

We need details

 

[61 Corpses]

Stressed I can't sleep, was talking to my dad on his way in from work.

He is talking to me about smash or pass on instagram

My. Dad. Was talking about smash or pass on instagram



He is talking about:

"It's women on there that are as wide as I can stretch my arms. Hell I should be on there if they can!"

"Its some on there that's almost porn, why would you do that"

"Do you have one? Thank I can get on there, Just joking I wouldn't do it seriously

"I mean if you think your sexy, in your own mind, I guess that's ok..."

Daddy I don't want to hear you say porn, sexy, smash or pass, or refer to yourself in such a manner again. Please and thank you.

Your pops is an OG

 

[Zapp Brannigan]

My parents were extremely tight lipped about their youth. They did find a giant bag of condoms I got from planned parenthood when I was 16 and the fuzzy handcuffs I got as a gag gift from a girl I was friends with at 17.

 

[Elle Driver]

My mom never talks to me about that type of shyt it's hella taboo I think she'd slap me real talk She ain't even tell me about the birds and the bees, I had to learn that shyt on my own.

 

[BruhMayne]

No, she didn't say anything about them using dinner plates, although I wouldn't be surprised.

Like I said, she was very descriptive, and some of the acts she described have led me to not want my mouth anywhere near, where her mouth has just been. That includes plates, forks, cups, bottles, etc.

Drop the details @J Reid, you already scarred so, might as well let us see why

 

[MrFettuccinnePockets]

No, she didn't say anything about them using dinner plates, although I wouldn't be surprised.

Like I said, she was very descriptive, and some of the acts she described have led me to not want my mouth anywhere near, where her mouth has just been. That includes plates, forks, cups, bottles, etc.

Anal gnawing?

 

[Amy Traphouse]

My mother, grandma, and aunts (who are over 55) planning a bachelorette party for me by taking pole dancing classes and going to a strip club .

They almost followed thru until I told them I wanted no parts of its and I would elope without them.

 

[61 Corpses]

I remember I skipped school one day back in 9th grade. My mother was working night shifts at the time and as long as I got out the crib before 8-8:30, she'd have no idea I wasn't in school. This time she came home early, and was unlocking the door just as I started to reach for it. I ran and hid under my bed. At this point, I'm a little flustered but not really tripping, thinking that she's tired and about to go right to sleep....

Her homegirl calls and they get to chatting; I have my door open so I hear everything. Almost IfukkINGMMEDIATELY the conversation turned demonic.

I went to my cousins house for the weekend a couple of days before, and apparently she took that opportunity to have a sex romp at the crib, with my step-dad, who was just her boyfriend at the time. She was being descriptive to the point of me thinking I was being trolled. When she finally did get of the phone and go to sleep, I left and smoked most of the weed I was planning to sell, while I contemplated never going back home. That was a bad day for me.


I'm not going into details but they both some freaks, and I haven't eaten a damn thing off of one of her plates, to this day.

"Nah I'm good, mom; I don't want the rest of your shrimp fried rice"




*You fukking freak*

 

[cleanface coney]

Drop the details @J Reid, you already scarred so, might as well let us see why

my nikka thats his momma

 

[BruhMayne]

my nikka thats his momma