Post your biggest/most embarassing L with a female

[eufemism]

Quite a few taLes to teLL.

I met this voluptuous chick when I was 17 or so. The breasts and ass was and we started talking. She was so sweet and really knew how to conversate, so one day we arrange a chill session at her older sisters place and she encourages me to bring a friend along so as not to make her sister the third wheel so I nominate my older cousin because he knows how to entertain. I didnt have a car so my cousin said he'd take us, nikka comes to fetch me and he's drunk as fukk so I drive to the house and when we get there she walks out wearing yoga pants . We get in and meet the sister who literally looked like Patrick from Spongebob and my cousin looks at me like and I respond with a. As the night progresses it becomes obvious that my cousin did not wanna take one for the team so he starts hitting on the chick I'm there for. She keeps giving him the but he wasn't hearing it. At one point she literally said I can't take this and went to sit next to her sister on the couch opposite to where we were sitting. We keep talking but it becomes painfully obvious that this bytch was upset so she gets up and goes to the kitchen and my cousin follows her. They had an open plan setup so we could see what was going down and nikka steps up behind her and she backs away and turns around to give him lip (even had a butter knife and started pointing at him ), nikka then steps into her harder and straight up starts kissing her. Eventually they come back, she's all red faced and she sits on a single couch and this nikka can't contain his giggles. Later on she goes to the bathroom and he follows her and they emerge 20 minutes later . The whole time I'm trying to speak to this bytch that look like she's wearing Scream mask, she had 0 conversation skills, 0 interesting things to say. The next day the bytch that fukked my cousin texts me and tells me that her sister is really into me

Other L's:

Fighting with a guy over an ex girlfriend.
Many texts with no responses.
Getting caught by the womans dad.
Getting caught by the womans brother.
Getting caught by the womans grandmother.
Simping for women that were cheating.
Dating a woman from another town who I later found out was a lowkey thot. Late in the relationship.
Being told the new stain on a girls car seat was yoghurt but the bytch was lactose intolerant.

gotta admire your cousin's persistence tho. convinced a girl to fukk while drunk

 

[shutterguy]

May not seem that big of an L but that shyt hurt though. lol

I remember like 4 yrs. ago over the summer I would see this ridiculously thick light skin jawn waiting for the bus in the mornings in front of my house. Ass was just stupid phat. Sometimes she'd be waiting with others, sometimes solo. I had her right there in front of me coming down the driveway but wouldn't say shyt before driving to work. I even told some co-workers about this broad and they're basically like "say something to her stupid". I'm 25 at this time acting at least half my age being all shy and shyt. lol
Even after talking with co-workers, I would still drive on to work. One day I had enough and told myself that I would approach her. Caught her solo as I rolled down the driveway in my car. First off, I don't know how many times I said "excuse miss" before she even turned her head. I started talking to her a bit and she soon hit me with "I have a boyfriend and we live up the street." Instead of just taking the L right there I hit her with the "we can still be friends" bit. She responds with "me and him been together for x number of years." All I could say after that was "congratulations and have a nice day."
I saw her a couple of times after that but once school started back up I never saw her again. She looked too old to be a student. Sometimes I think I spooked her and shyt. lol

Damn you Nicole.

first time having sex with a big girl, couldn't keep it up....

I did this once, and the same thing happened to me. Vowed to never, never, ever go down that path ever again.

 

[Silkk]

 

[Broad Street Bully]

The entire 2013 year

Was simping this bytch hard, brehs, hard. Would take this bytch out to eat, pay for both our meals, take this bytch to the movies, pay for both our tickets plus food and I cant couldnt get past flirty, explicit text msgs. Am basically in friend zone hell but I figured I could buy my way outta there So later I realize this and I see that i aint going nowhere with this so i cut this bytch off for the rest of year. I was a fat ass nikka last summer so I had the urge to get into the gym and better myself (and better myself I did ) so fast forward to about late june of this year, she see that i done totally transformed, am getting all types of bytches, bytches much badder than her so she hit me up on the Gram on some random shyt like "hey". So me, am looking at this shyt like :russfoh: but I entertain her. Few messages in, am like "yeah you miss me don't you? " she like "yeah, I do here's my number, hmu". Long story short, she want me to bomb so badly now, its crazy. So am bouta bomb on her all crazy

bytches don't want you till they see you bussing bytches thats badder than her ass then they'll run back to you.

 

[King Crimson]

Ex raised her hand at me, I flinched and farted
Diggin in another ex trying to bust me some nuts and busted a fart

Sleeping with another ex after eating Denny's whole wheat pancakes, was farting in my sleep all night

 

[GoPro]

2 incidents that ive mentioned on here before

1) in HS my boy instigating some shyt in math class going around asking this chick who she would fukk in here...when my boy got to my name ol girl said loudly "please id rather masturbate"....my soul was burning after that i couldnt even come up with a comeback

2) some years ago i used to fukk with test boosters heavy in efforts to put them cuts in my physique..had a nikka looking a pro wrestler...never suffered any side effects except for the one time i disregarded a warning on taking a max dosage...doing that fukked with my libido....i had a chick over ready to put in work...the spirit was willing but the flesh was weak...terrible L that thankfully I did get a second chance once that shyt got out of my system and my libido went back to normal..i had to put in a top 3 sex performance in life to redeem things

Damn breh, we must be twins. My "who would you mess with" was backin like 5th grade. About 10 of us at this chick's house in her bedroom, this one dude asks her the question for all the dudes. She says yes for everybody, but once he gets to me and she says "nah, we're just friends!". Not gonna lie, i was dorky in grade school, but I ain't like this bytch anyway nor were we friends. She looked like a roach

And I was once a victim of limp disnick. It was the first time smashing one of my exes. I was thinking too much like "I gotta impress this chick with my stroke game" cause she was the type who I just knew had plenty dikk before me. "Reformed" ratchet not quite reformed enough type.

Told her I was taking creatine and it must be fukking with my blood flow . Luckily she ain't dead me right there, we lasted a couple months and I put in work each time.

 

[Kidd Dibiase]

I did this once, and the same thing happened to me. Vowed to never, never, ever go down that path ever again.

I made up for it the 2nd time me and her hooked up, it was like i had a marathon pro perk

 

[BreezyH]

in middle school "dated" this chick, so pretty much just talking on the phone and hand holding back then. would rather hang out with the boys and play ball so didn't really pay her much mind. she wrote me a breakup letter and had like 10 diff people write testimonials on why they agreed. must've held on to that for a week before i tore it up and move on with life haha

I'll never forget this...cuz it kinda molded me into the nikka I am today.

The year was 2004...I was about 15. I had just gotten a cell phone. It was a little T-Mobile prepaid flip joint. I got this girl's number, and I'm texting her and what not, she lol'ing and shyt like everything good. Then one day I texted her, and she just flipped the fukk out on me son. She hit me with some shyt like "YOU DOING TOO MUCH, JUST LEAVE ME ALONE" and I'm just sitting there like . Keep in mind, I was a fragile 15 year old at the time, and didn't really understand the game. So, I'm texting her like "Did I do something?", "What's wrong?" "Please talk to me " then finally I just never texted her again. It had me in the fukk bytches mindset for madd long, actually until about 2010-2011.

Fast forward several years to I think 2009, I was a Sophomore in college, I see her she's working in a department store. We exchange numbers, and she hits me up and we talk for a little bit. And this bytch had the audacity to say "Why we stop talking back then" So I tell her the whole story and she on some "Awww I don't remember that " but I keep it cool, cause in my mind I was already planning out how I could dog her out as bad as I could. Long story short, we actually dated for awhile, then it ended.



Moral of the story: You always gotta fukk the bytches that turned you down when y'all were younger.

always.

 

[Behind-the-wheel]

I don't think I had too many back in the day. The worst I have ever did was drunk dialing one night, and idk what the fukk I said, but she was hesitant around me for awhile after that. I let a lot of chicks slip by me and I would end up thinking about them later and what could have been. Back in high school there was chick who was a dime (although she did get around alot but she was a nice girl) and for some reason people kept nagging me to to ask her to the prom, and I didn't thinking "Why would that bytch even try to fukk around w/ me. " Years later, I met her brother, and upon hearing my name he was like " YOU'RE THE GUY MY SISTER USED TO TALK ABOUT ALL THE TIME!" Then it all made sense as to why everyone was nagging me to ask her to the prom and being the clueless fool that I was...I didn't. I looked at myself in the mirror that night and gave myself a well deserved

.

OMG....that stinks!!

But that smilie yo.....

 

[Behind-the-wheel]

I remember when i was young going through puberty and my voice was scratchy and shyt; there was this party line callwd the loop (i think) out here in LA. I got on the shyt and there was some chick that clicked in and asked are there any guys from blah blah area.

I was all geeked like a motherfukker and click in and say a yo I'm from blah blah area with this high cracking voice like screech from saved by the bell. The chick clicked in and was like im not talking to a guy with a voice like that.

Then some guy came in with some deep ass voice on some dark vader shyt and said im from blah blah and she hooked up with him.

I was low key mad a fukk; but that party line closed down quick because girls were going to these dudes homes and were expecting a 14 years old kid and the dude was like 35 and shyt. fukking pedos.

Stupid tricks...what the hell they think is on the other end with a gaddamn james earl jones voice?!?!
Ain't no damn tennager with a voice like that.

No sympathy for these stupid hoes. I hope they got their a$$holes stretched out...

 

[imtheillest]

Ex was talking some dumb shyt on the phone i wasnt really listening. Blah, blah,blah.......then I hear "...an old teddy bear that has sentimental value or a new teddy bear that talks and has all the bells and whistles, etc, which one would you choose?" Without hesitation I said the new one, Duh. Well brehs........I was the old bear n she was breaking up with me n moving on .bytch made me sign my own death certificate.....

 

[At30wecashout]

Probably having this girl I liked contact me out of the blue and ask if I was single, only to curve me when I wrote a Poem for her. Then my trans blew while taking her home....shyt was basura.