Prostitutes posing as regular chicks UNAPPRECIATION thread

[The_Sheff]

Since then I started peepin how certain chicks would be in the club dressed TOO scandalous and too aggressive and figured out they were working girls. So here's the next story.


2015 in Lagos, Nigeria

I'm at a club (57 if you're familiar with the city) tired AS fukk. It's late and I'm ready to go home. Plus I hadn't seen one chick worth talking to. Lastly, me and my friends bought VIP and it was mad nikkas in the section. What the fukk was the point? Everyone keeps bumping into me and I'm getting pissed but I turn my head and see this fine ass chick walking towards the stars.


Me: *making eye contact*

Chick:

Me: *turns back around*

All of a sudden this chick comes up next to me and is all touchy feely on my arm.

Chick: Hey.

Me: Umm hey... What's good?

So we start having a convo and start dancing and I offer her some of the Hennessy we have at the table.

Chick: I don't drink that. I want some wine.

That's not a big deal so we walk to the bar so I can buy her some wine. My homie (who is from Nigeria) rushes to the bar and grabs me by the arm.

homie: They don't sell drinks here, just bottles.

Me: Oh but she just wants some wine.

bartender: We don't have wine.

Chick: Well give me some cranberry juice then.

So I pay $10 for a fukking carafe of cranberry juice and go back to VIP. Things are fine and then the chick starts getting antsy.


Chick: Hey I'm bout to leave. Can you walk me out?

homie: Dog, you're not from here don't walk out there with her.

Me: Relax, I'll just walk her to the exit.

We get to the exit and she switches it up.

her: We're going to SIPs.

me: Okay, cool. Give me your number so I can hit you up. We might roll that way later.

her: *exasperated sigh* WHY DO YOU NEED MY NUMBER?

me: So i can text you and keep in contact.

her: LOOK, DO YOU WANT TO BE WITH ME OR NOT?

me: I just met you. I'd like to get to know you first.

her:

At this point I realized she was a worker and bounced back to VIP. But once again, another learning experience. I couldn't believe out here on another continent there are hookers in the club. The prostitute game is deep. I'm actually mad at myself for falling for it because I knew the signs by now. I thought I had seen it all, but my next encounter really blew my mind.

Basil?

 

[Ain't That Something]

got a breh that done caught hands from one of them trannies right outside the Varsity.

We decided to walk Midtown that evening after eating and this broad shouldered motherfukker rolled up on his ass after me and my other friend ignored it. Me and him decided to not to say anything and see if breh would realize he was talking to a dude. This nikka was actually spittin lyrics at this xman character.. So I finally said. "Bruh, check the throat action.." The next few minutes were the hardest I laughed in my life..

Breh took a look at the throat.. Dude went from to so quick. I think off just general instinct breh just threw a quick jab off disgust but the tranny was ready , that thing juked around that fist like Roy Jones..wig flew off and all from the speed of the evasion. .. Tranny was completely bald headed ..

All femininity is lost at that point and this tranny goes southpaw on my breh. Mind you it's Friday evening and there's people everywhere watching this shyt.. These nikkas squared up and the tranny talking about "don't get mad after I feed you these nuts after I beat your ass." ..fam, tranny put in a three piece combo so tough, my boy folded up like a lawn chair on the sidewalk. I'm standing there like.. "Should I intervene?" . My other homeboy decided to ride up like the calvary and sucker punch it. Fam.. My nikkas fist rolled off that jawline like rain on a windshield..breh looking at the tranny like and the tranny looking like .. The tranny goes into stance and now my boy backing up, going into the crowd for cover. I get my breh whose just now getting off the ground and yell at my boy (whose dodging punches in the crowd to get the fukk on before cops arrive). Atlanta has provided me some memories.

fukking tears breh, at the imagery of this post

fukking dead

 

[The M.I.C.]

It's true but maybe hookers are just shy like all women and don't want to look me in the eye I get shy too sometimes

Most I've encountered were aggressive as hell.

 

[Sleepy Walker]

I have a couple of stories from doing Uber and growing up in Atlanta with tranny and female toots.

 

[Fukwatutalkinwatisaylaw]

Okay so this is my last story. This shyt literally just happened and made me realize I need to trust my instincts.


2016 in Madrid, Spain

My friends and I roll out to one of few places playing hip hop out here. We get in and it's a great vibe. I instantly peep that the girls are quality and the Real Madrid basketball team is up in there posted up, looking awkward as fukk, and getting groupie love.

I'm like because I know these nikkas wouldn't be shyt in the US but they winning out here. More power to them. I separate from my friends to go to the bathroom and see a chick with one of the BADDEST MUFUKKIN BODIES I'VE EVER SEEN IN REAL LIFE. She was straight up IG, "check my booking info" status. Because she looked that good I wasn't in the mindframe to talk to her. Also keep in mind, my spanish is intermediate so it's difficult anyway.

To my surprise the chick comes up to me. [Red Flag #1] I'm gone off the liq so I'm spittin Spanish game. She gives me her number so I can hit her on Whatsapp and goes back upstairs. I finish the night and my friends want to go to the next venue. The whole time we'd been texting.

I walk upstairs and she's with her girl and they're talking to two guys. [Red Flag #2] I decide to assert my alpha male dominance and walk right past the euro cac she was talking to and say goodbye.

(this convo is in Spanish but I'll type it in English)

Me: Who is that?

Chick: Oh that's my friend and her friend.

Me: What about the guy you were talking to?

Chick: Oh him? Nooooooo! Me gusta negra

At this point I'm feelin myself because I got a major win. But something's not right. It was TOO EASY.

We proceed to text over the next week with my main mission being to find out if she's a prostitute or not. I can't outright ask, because if I do and I'm wrong then I just missed out on potentially one of my best lays ever. So I'm trying to be subtle.

But brehs, SOMETHING STILL ISNT right. This chick says she's Venezuelan but types in the most broken spanish ever. She says she's taking online courses for a degree. Every day I try to get her to come out she always has an excuse. Tonight I'm like fukk it, let me see if I can get her to come out.

If you don't understand what I'm saying, I'm pretty much asking her why she's not coming out. She asks me if I have a gift or something to offer her if she comes out. I play along to see her endgame, but tell her I'll give her my company and a drink. But her next texts give me all the confirmation I need.

Spoiler: NSFW: She sent me an ass pic

DAT CULO!!

At this point I'm curious. Finally we're done with all the subtext. I know I'm dealing with a pro but this is semi-fascinating to me. Who takes the time to get a guys number, engage in frivolous conversation for a week, but never mention sex. Like what's her endgame? How does this transaction work? Where would this go down? I have a lot of questions. I decide to play along to satisfy my curiosity and ask her what's it gonna cost to get her to come out.

300 EUROS MY NIG?!?! That's hella expensive, even if you didn't consider the exchange rate. But yo there are other things wrong here.

#1: She says she needs to buy a book? This must be some legal loophole shyt in case I was a cop

#2: She switches to English alluva sudden. When I met this bytch she aint speak a lick of English!!

So ONCE AGAIN I got fooled. I thought I had a solid chick in the stable and she just wants to get paid. I know this is a long ass story but I had to share with yall. If something seems too good to be true it probably is.

Like part of me is low-key offended. I'm a handsome American black man with options. I get a lot of love out here. Why would I pay for p*ssy? And why the fukk would I pay 300 euros for it!?!?

U on vacation and get a ass pic of a bad bytch.. I woulda paid

 

[Fukwatutalkinwatisaylaw]

I'm not sure that GTA shyt is gonna work in real life.

It can u just gotta be quick and plan out ur exit before u smash.. I did it and took tha bread and hauled ass had her pimp chasing me on tha highway.. shyt was intense and scary but funny as fukk when I was in tha clear

 

[FaTaL]

she doesn't type broken spanish, you do. and she's not looking for a trick, she's looking for a sugar daddy, that's why she took her time instead of just offering you p*ssy for 30 euros.

edit: and prostitution isn't illegal in spain, so she doesn't need to find excuses in case you're a cop.

That knowledge

 

[Mowgli]

Okay so this is my last story. This shyt literally just happened and made me realize I need to trust my instincts.


2016 in Madrid, Spain

My friends and I roll out to one of few places playing hip hop out here. We get in and it's a great vibe. I instantly peep that the girls are quality and the Real Madrid basketball team is up in there posted up, looking awkward as fukk, and getting groupie love.

I'm like because I know these nikkas wouldn't be shyt in the US but they winning out here. More power to them. I separate from my friends to go to the bathroom and see a chick with one of the BADDEST MUFUKKIN BODIES I'VE EVER SEEN IN REAL LIFE. She was straight up IG, "check my booking info" status. Because she looked that good I wasn't in the mindframe to talk to her. Also keep in mind, my spanish is intermediate so it's difficult anyway.

To my surprise the chick comes up to me. [Red Flag #1] I'm gone off the liq so I'm spittin Spanish game. She gives me her number so I can hit her on Whatsapp and goes back upstairs. I finish the night and my friends want to go to the next venue. The whole time we'd been texting.

I walk upstairs and she's with her girl and they're talking to two guys. [Red Flag #2] I decide to assert my alpha male dominance and walk right past the euro cac she was talking to and say goodbye.

(this convo is in Spanish but I'll type it in English)

Me: Who is that?

Chick: Oh that's my friend and her friend.

Me: What about the guy you were talking to?

Chick: Oh him? Nooooooo! Me gusta negra

At this point I'm feelin myself because I got a major win. But something's not right. It was TOO EASY.

We proceed to text over the next week with my main mission being to find out if she's a prostitute or not. I can't outright ask, because if I do and I'm wrong then I just missed out on potentially one of my best lays ever. So I'm trying to be subtle.

But brehs, SOMETHING STILL ISNT right. This chick says she's Venezuelan but types in the most broken spanish ever. She says she's taking online courses for a degree. Every day I try to get her to come out she always has an excuse. Tonight I'm like fukk it, let me see if I can get her to come out.

If you don't understand what I'm saying, I'm pretty much asking her why she's not coming out. She asks me if I have a gift or something to offer her if she comes out. I play along to see her endgame, but tell her I'll give her my company and a drink. But her next texts give me all the confirmation I need.

Spoiler: NSFW: She sent me an ass pic

DAT CULO!!

At this point I'm curious. Finally we're done with all the subtext. I know I'm dealing with a pro but this is semi-fascinating to me. Who takes the time to get a guys number, engage in frivolous conversation for a week, but never mention sex. Like what's her endgame? How does this transaction work? Where would this go down? I have a lot of questions. I decide to play along to satisfy my curiosity and ask her what's it gonna cost to get her to come out.

300 EUROS MY NIG?!?! That's hella expensive, even if you didn't consider the exchange rate. But yo there are other things wrong here.

#1: She says she needs to buy a book? This must be some legal loophole shyt in case I was a cop

#2: She switches to English alluva sudden. When I met this bytch she aint speak a lick of English!!

So ONCE AGAIN I got fooled. I thought I had a solid chick in the stable and she just wants to get paid. I know this is a long ass story but I had to share with yall. If something seems too good to be true it probably is.

Like part of me is low-key offended. I'm a handsome American black man with options. I get a lot of love out here. Why would I pay for p*ssy? And why the fukk would I pay 300 euros for it!?!?

Why didn't you just haggle her down to 80 dollars. That's like date money anyway

 

[Boogie]

Man I never heard of backpage until I came on the Coli

Those hoes are trifling y'all better off just fukking a jump off.

 

[peppe]

got a breh that done caught hands from one of them trannies right outside the Varsity.

We decided to walk Midtown that evening after eating and this broad shouldered motherfukker rolled up on his ass after me and my other friend ignored it. Me and him decided to not to say anything and see if breh would realize he was talking to a dude. This nikka was actually spittin lyrics at this xman character.. So I finally said. "Bruh, check the throat action.." The next few minutes were the hardest I laughed in my life..

Breh took a look at the throat.. Dude went from to so quick. I think off just general instinct breh just threw a quick jab off disgust but the tranny was ready , that thing juked around that fist like Roy Jones..wig flew off and all from the speed of the evasion. .. Tranny was completely bald headed ..

All femininity is lost at that point and this tranny goes southpaw on my breh. Mind you it's Friday evening and there's people everywhere watching this shyt.. These nikkas squared up and the tranny talking about "don't get mad after I feed you these nuts after I beat your ass." ..fam, tranny put in a three piece combo so tough, my boy folded up like a lawn chair on the sidewalk. I'm standing there like.. "Should I intervene?" . My other homeboy decided to ride up like the calvary and sucker punch it. Fam.. My nikkas fist rolled off that jawline like rain on a windshield..breh looking at the tranny like and the tranny looking like .. The tranny goes into stance and now my boy backing up, going into the crowd for cover. I get my breh whose just now getting off the ground and yell at my boy (whose dodging punches in the crowd to get the fukk on before cops arrive). Atlanta has provided me some memories.

I'm dying here man

 

[Virtuous_Brotha]

Sounds like a great way to get jacked

Definitely especially if the chick is semi attractive fuk is she doing approaching a man when she don't need to nikkaz gotta be street wise out here and not go anywhere a strange bytch may lead you to especially in a fukin car

 

[Slimkid07]

got a breh that done caught hands from one of them trannies right outside the Varsity.

We decided to walk Midtown that evening after eating and this broad shouldered motherfukker rolled up on his ass after me and my other friend ignored it. Me and him decided to not to say anything and see if breh would realize he was talking to a dude. This nikka was actually spittin lyrics at this xman character.. So I finally said. "Bruh, check the throat action.." The next few minutes were the hardest I laughed in my life..

Breh took a look at the throat.. Dude went from to so quick. I think off just general instinct breh just threw a quick jab off disgust but the tranny was ready , that thing juked around that fist like Roy Jones..wig flew off and all from the speed of the evasion. .. Tranny was completely bald headed ..

All femininity is lost at that point and this tranny goes southpaw on my breh. Mind you it's Friday evening and there's people everywhere watching this shyt.. These nikkas squared up and the tranny talking about "don't get mad after I feed you these nuts after I beat your ass." ..fam, tranny put in a three piece combo so tough, my boy folded up like a lawn chair on the sidewalk. I'm standing there like.. "Should I intervene?" . My other homeboy decided to ride up like the calvary and sucker punch it. Fam.. My nikkas fist rolled off that jawline like rain on a windshield..breh looking at the tranny like and the tranny looking like .. The tranny goes into stance and now my boy backing up, going into the crowd for cover. I get my breh whose just now getting off the ground and yell at my boy (whose dodging punches in the crowd to get the fukk on before cops arrive). Atlanta has provided me some memories.

A lot of cats think gay dudes and transsexuals are on some soft shyt but get met with a rude awakening.
Out here in Hollywood, I've seen plenty of dudes think they can run up on a gay/trans person because they be looking like...

but then when it comes down to shootin the fair one, they transform from that to...

Some of these cats have been fighting their whole lives. Late night diners be delivering comedy.

 

[BaggerofTea]

got a breh that done caught hands from one of them trannies right outside the Varsity.

We decided to walk Midtown that evening after eating and this broad shouldered motherfukker rolled up on his ass after me and my other friend ignored it. Me and him decided to not to say anything and see if breh would realize he was talking to a dude. This nikka was actually spittin lyrics at this xman character.. So I finally said. "Bruh, check the throat action.." The next few minutes were the hardest I laughed in my life..

Breh took a look at the throat.. Dude went from to so quick. I think off just general instinct breh just threw a quick jab off disgust but the tranny was ready , that thing juked around that fist like Roy Jones..wig flew off and all from the speed of the evasion. .. Tranny was completely bald headed ..

All femininity is lost at that point and this tranny goes southpaw on my breh. Mind you it's Friday evening and there's people everywhere watching this shyt.. These nikkas squared up and the tranny talking about "don't get mad after I feed you these nuts after I beat your ass." ..fam, tranny put in a three piece combo so tough, my boy folded up like a lawn chair on the sidewalk. I'm standing there like.. "Should I intervene?" . My other homeboy decided to ride up like the calvary and sucker punch it. Fam.. My nikkas fist rolled off that jawline like rain on a windshield..breh looking at the tranny like and the tranny looking like .. The tranny goes into stance and now my boy backing up, going into the crowd for cover. I get my breh whose just now getting off the ground and yell at my boy (whose dodging punches in the crowd to get the fukk on before cops arrive). Atlanta has provided me some memories.

 

[BaggerofTea]

Definitely especially if the chick is semi attractive fuk is she doing approaching a man when she don't need to nikkaz gotta be street wise out here and not go anywhere a strange bytch may lead you to especially in a fukin car

That's what I'm saying, it seems like a VERY easy way to end up on the six o clock news, breh probably dodged one there. We may have had one less coli poster

 

[AkaDemiK]

One of the best asses I've EVER seen in person.

I feel so foolish thinking I could have it so easily for free.

hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha

nikka got me cryin right now