Serious thread: I'm 90% my GF isn't sexually attracted to me.

[The Mad Titan]

Broke up with her behind this issue 2 months ago, went out with my best friend as his wingman to try and lift my spirit.

Ended up clicking with the friend of the woman he was talking to, real cool lawyer girl. We ended up fukking within 24 hours and the sex was great, amazing even. Me and her have crazy sexual chemistry, not gonna lie I was shell-shocked because I realize I hadn't had actual "great" sex in 4+ years.

... Then I got back with my GF 4 days later, thinking that I got the sexual tension out my system enough to go another stretch trying to work it out with her.

After an average sexual encounter and flat out bad sexual encounter that had us both seriously questioning if we could ever fix it. I ended up cheating and fukking the lawyer girl again, we're fukking til this day.

I'm still with my GF and I didn't tell her about the other woman, but I didn't want to be fukking both of them at the same time so I basically told her that I don't think sex adds anything positive to our relationship at this point and we should abstain from it for a good while and see how things go. It's been pretty smooth for the most part except a few nights where I guess she found herself being horny and would try to initiate sex, but I would just side step those advances and she wouldn't really trip or beg.

I suggested us abstaining for my own selfish reasons, but in a weird turn of events I honestly think explicitly cutting sex out of our relationship dynamic has made her way happier. She even noticed how good she has felt in the relationship in the past few months, but she was in denial about it being tied to us not having sex.

With the other woman she knows my GF exist and knows we're close, but since we met during the break up and never told her other wise, she thinks we're still broken up. And I know what I'm doing is wrong because I can tell she's catching deeper and deeper feeling as time goes on.

You asking for all kinds of problems, jump ship before its too late.

Aint no point in being in a "relationship" with two people at once.

 

[™BlackPearl The Empress™]

Ya'll some weirdos:funny:

You could start a sister wives club breh

 

[ignorethis]

Biological imperative is undefeated

Look at the dead bedrooms reddit thread in TLR, once you realize you're sexually incompatible with your partner, only thing you guys can do is be honest with each other and find a real solution whether that be an open relationship or breaking up.

Because the unfulfilled partner will always find fulfillment with somebody else if the option presents itself. People feel shame and try and fight it, but 99% of people fold in that scenario.

 

[Jamesmac91]

Biological imperative is undefeated

Look at the dead bedrooms reddit thread in TLR, once you realize you're sexually incompatible with your partner, only thing you guys can do is be honest with each other and find a real solution whether that be an open relationship or breaking up.

Because the unfulfilled partner will always find fulfillment with somebody else if the option presents itself. People feel shame and try and fight it, but 99% of people fold in that scenario.

I had a long written response on why I can't just leave and how perfect our relationship is outside of sex.

Then I ended up going r/deadbedrooms and reading.

And I literally saw what I was about to post almost 10 times by different people. shyt made me realize that my situation isn't as unique as I thought it was.

You had men and women describing exactly how I felt when I cheated and why cheating or even a mutual agreement allowing you to step out the relationship is going to fail in the long run.

People who spent 20+ years miserable hoping things would get better.

I'm out of town so I can even talk to her face to face until Friday, but I texted her that I had something that I really need to tell her and I've been being a coward. I begged her to don't forget and hold me to it, but I can tell she doesn't think whatever I tell her is gonna be a big deal.

I'll let you guys know how confessing goes and what happens after that.

 

[LauderdaleBoss]

Shorty in the OP sound miserable as fukk.

 

[Jamesmac91]

Just getting back home after confessing her, long story, she didn't take it well. She hates me.

I feel like shyt about what I did and the fact I really just nuked my relationship and a decade long friendship.

Done permanent damage to somebody I said I loved.

Honestly I regret confessing.

 

[BruhManFromTheFifthFlo]

Just getting back home after confessing her, long story, she didn't take it well. She hates me.

I feel like shyt about what I did and the fact I really just nuked my relationship and a decade long friendship.

Done permanent damage to somebody I said I loved.

Honestly I regret confessing.

Aye bruh, real talk; between this and ya other thread, sounds like she was probably molested as a child, or some kind of sexual assault when she was younger. Her behavior ain't normal

 

[Swaggatron]

Damn breh...this seemed doomed from the start :DucesHomie:

 

[Jamesmac91]

Aye bruh, real talk; between this and ya other thread, sounds like she was probably molested as a child, or some kind of sexual assault when she was younger. Her behavior ain't normal

That was one of the things I thought it could've been and I asked her multiple times did she have some type of sexual trauma in the past.

But she always said absolutely not and remained steadfast in her problems being rooted in her religious upbringing and physical issues with her vagina.

I been with women with sexual trauma and they've always opened up about their past within months of us knowing each other. So I can see her holding that in and lying to me about it for years, especially when she knows our sex dynamic is strained and might end the relationship.

 

[BruhManFromTheFifthFlo]

That was one of the things I thought it could've been and I asked her multiple times did she have some type of sexual trauma in the past.

But she always said absolutely not and remained steadfast in her problems being rooted in her religious upbringing and physical issues with her vagina.

I been with women with sexual trauma and they've always opened up about their past within months of us knowing each other. So I can see her holding that in and lying to me about it for years, especially when she knows our sex dynamic is strained and might end the relationship.

The thing is, she could really just not remember. It’s not a matter of her lying to you, sometimes sexual assault victims will block it out of their memeory. There was a thread on here a while back from some guy on reddit that was having problems with his wife not wanting to clean herself. He ended up taking her to therapy where through lots of sessions and questioning, they found out she was abused by her brother and father. She had suppressed it. That happens very often when the abuse happens in early childhood. Sometimes it’s so traumatic the brain will forget about it to protect itself, but symptoms will linger

 

[ORDER_66]

Your better off man... move on, stop acting like a simp...

 

[Giselle]

. I find a female subreddit about vaginimus which would be kinda helpful for her, but the consistent theme is that as a man I can't do anything about it. And whenever I find male perspectives on the subject the common response from dudes that dealt with similar situations is "run for your life, it's never gonna get better, don't commit to her, don't marry her, get out of that situation ASAP" or ”One day she's gonna run into a dude that makes her wet and she not even gonna have to question fukking him, but it's not gonna be you."

Broke up with her behind this issue 2 months ago, went out with my best friend as his wingman to try and lift my spirit.

Ended up clicking with the friend of the woman he was talking to, real cool lawyer girl. We ended up fukking within 24 hours and the sex was great, amazing even. Me and her have crazy sexual chemistry, not gonna lie I was shell-shocked because I realize I hadn't had actual "great" sex in 4+ years.

... Then I got back with my GF 4 days later, thinking that I got the sexual tension out my system enough to go another stretch trying to work it out with her.

After an average sexual encounter and flat out bad sexual encounter that had us both seriously questioning if we could ever fix it. I ended up cheating and fukking the lawyer girl again, we're fukking til this day.

I'm still with my GF and I didn't tell her about the other woman, but I didn't want to be fukking both of them at the same time so I basically told her that I don't think sex adds anything positive to our relationship at this point and we should abstain from it for a good while and see how things go. It's been pretty smooth for the most part except a few nights where I guess she found herself being horny and would try to initiate sex, but I would just side step those advances and she wouldn't really trip or beg.

I suggested us abstaining for my own selfish reasons, but in a weird turn of events I honestly think explicitly cutting sex out of our relationship dynamic has made her way happier. She even noticed how good she has felt in the relationship in the past few months, but she was in denial about it being tied to us not having sex.

With the other woman she knows my GF exist and knows we're close, but since we met during the break up and never told her other wise, she thinks we're still broken up. And I know what I'm doing is wrong because I can tell she's catching deeper and deeper feeling as time goes on.

Vaginismus is real and that is more than likely what is wrong with her as a later in life virgin. They have therapy to fix that though. You should have asked her can she identify with the symptoms and vaginismus and suggested vaginal therapy and regular therapy for her!!


This probably could have easily been solved with therapy, but you decided to cheat. You are terrible!!

Glad that you confessed and she no longer has to be with a cheater though.

 

[Couth]

Im not reading your life story. Goofy.

But you said your self she only messed with 4 dudes b4 you. She was a virgin. You guys were friends for years and she never tried to fukk you. Maybe she just isn't a sexual person...

You sound hella insecure too.

Feelings don't matter. They're not real. Don't invest too much time in them. Disregard them and get money. Females gonna do what she wants and feel how she feels. She only has an effect on you if you allow her too.


Rewire your mind breh. Forget the girl. Focus on physical and monetary progress.

 

[Mr swag]

someone else is beating those guts out. She is crying because she is cheating on her man with you

she wont even give you head. she is a lair

 

[Claudex]

All this time I didn't even know she wanted to be in a relationship with me. I didn't want to be in a relationship period, but long story short after initially denying it, I granted her wish of us becoming a couple.

The couple thing came with ups and downs, with a few slip-ups on her part, but that's beside the subject.

we got genie nikkas in this forum? Breh!