sharing common interests (hobbies, music, entertainment interests..etc.)

[Saysumthinfunnymike]

How important are these things to you in a relationship? For me, a girl who looks wise fits all the things I would ever want is great but if we don't have a lot of common interests, even if we have quality discussion and can find common areas, it's really hard to continue to find things to do after a while. I think I need a lot of shared interests in order to function properly over the long term. I understand that there will be give and take. I'll go to that play she wants to go to or [insert whatever here] but I can only take it so far and vice versa. Why do I want a girl to be my best friend, I don't know.. but I've seen couples like this and I envy them.

 

[WaveGang]

opposites attract my brother, you generally want someone who shares the same morals/ethics as you.

I've dated girls I shared interests with and the novelty wore of after while.

 

[Saysumthinfunnymike]

opposites attract my brother, you generally want someone who shares the same morals/ethics as you.

.....

 

[WaveGang]

I see what you're saying but these girls be out here bullshytting. Not just girls, I'm sure guys do too but it's easy to tell people what you THINK they want to hear and warp your opinions around what they believe.

People will tell you anything, what they 'show' you is all you should be concerned with.

 

[Saysumthinfunnymike]

People will tell you anything, what they 'show' you is all you should be concerned with.

True but it's not always easy to sift through the bullshyt. Sometimes it takes me a bit to realize they are putting on a show for me but that's part of my problem too because I am (or used to be) trusting of them and WANTED to believe they are who they say and or appeared to be.

 

[Couth]

Well im a boring person. I'm not really into the same stuff that most other people are into. So i don't expect females to share any of my interests.

But if we're gonna be in a relationship we have to be able to vibe. Like even though me and my current girl don't share a lot of interests we can still sit down and talk all night and just have a good ass convo. Thats more important to me then us liking the same stuff. And this really ties into personality. She has to be able to communicate with me in such a way that i'm interested, even if shes talking about some dumb shyt like keeping up with the kardashians or whatever. Like i said its about vibing.

I also need a female whose open minded and adventurous. I can't stand girls who be like "i hate all animals" or "i hate all jamaican food" or "i hate going hiking" or "i hate this song" when they haven't even tried it. If you try it and you really don't fukk with it thats cool, but i need a female whose at least down to try new shyt. Cuz i'm always up to broaden my own horizons.

 

[Rusty Kuntz]

Important to share some similar interests, but I didn't want a male clone of myself. That would be boring as hell.

My husband and I have common interests/beliefs, but we're different enough that we constantly introduce each other to new things we find interesting.

 

[Kenny West]

it helps

but the vibe overall is more important. she can learn to tolerate shyt your into and vice versa

 

[Saysumthinfunnymike]

Important to share some similar interests, but I didn't want a male clone of myself. That would be boring as hell.

My husband and I have common interests/beliefs, but we're different enough that we constantly introduce each other to new things we find interesting.

I can see that and I am definitely open to new things but for whatever the reason I am having issues finding a girl who is willing to go that extra for me. I mean they will but I am not looking for someone to agree with me or say they find something interesting but in the back of their mind going "ugh I'd rather be.."

It's difficult for me to find someone who will not be fake about it. So, I've been talking to a girl lately (I haven't asked her out or anything yet because I'm coming off a relationship recently) but this girl is just really into a lot of things that I love to do and I'm daydreaming about what it would be like to have a partner like that where we don't have to fake it...

You know?

 

[Rusty Kuntz]

I can see that and I am definitely open to new things but for whatever the reason I am having issues finding a girl who is willing to go that extra for me. I mean they will but I am not looking for someone to agree with me or say they find something interesting but in the back of their mind going "ugh I'd rather be.."

It's difficult for me to find someone who will not be fake about it. So, I've been talking to a girl lately (I haven't asked her out or anything yet because I'm coming off a relationship recently) but this girl is just really into a lot of things that I love to do and I'm daydreaming about what it would be like to have a partner like that where we don't have to fake it...

You know?

Do you consider yourself someone that is a good judge of someone's character? If you do, then you should be able to generally tell when someone is being genuine or not. Unless that person is a very good liar, then that facade will slip quick as hell. I imagine it's hard as hell for most people to put up a front for an extended period of time.

 

[MikelArteta]

Everyone is different

I'm more worry of her character, has she cheated in teh past, does she view relationships as disposable, is she a thot? is she loyal?

all that other interests ish is
im a introvert, im fine with a extrovert or a chick that is like me

 

[Saysumthinfunnymike]

Do you consider yourself someone that is a good judge of someone's character? If you do, then you should be able to generally tell when someone is being genuine or not. Unless that person is a very good liar, then that facade will slip quick as hell. I imagine it's hard as hell for most people to put up a front for an extended period of time.

I'm a good judge of character when it doesn't involve myself but I don't start up a relationship for the sake of it so when I do it means that I'm really into the girl and I get caught up wanting to believe they are the same person from the first couple months of our relationship. My guard is down and like I said, they will put a show for the first couple months and I can't get past it. I get really when they end up being not quite who they originally portrayed. I just want to be happy but the lying and deceiving is something that is unforgiveable in my eyes. I want someone to be straight with me from jump.

That's why I figure if it's someone where we don't have to pretend interests then maybe it'd be healthy to build the trust from there..

 

[Rocket Scientist]

Naw she gotta have an interest in an area I don't.For example if I watch comedy movies,she gotta be more into plays or something.If we have too much of same interests it would be annoying.You can have something in common just not too much.

 

[Taadow]

*takes sip of this Henn*

Look...you gots to like them, mayne.
Y'alls' relationship ain't gonna work if you don't like that person.

Having shared interests can help...
But dig - the reason "opposites attract" sometimes is because you can appreciate
the differences between that person and yourself - they are the yin to your yang.

In either case, it still won't work if you don't care enough to do anything with
them whether you have common interests or not.

 

[Saysumthinfunnymike]

That was one thing I hated about my last relationship. I could appreciate that she did not want to talk through our issues at my pace. I always want to get things done. I can't live with something hanging overhead. She never compromised with me and instead ran away from anything that might be seen as a difficult conversation.