sharing common interests (hobbies, music, entertainment interests..etc.)

[Rusty Kuntz]

I'm a good judge of character when it doesn't involve myself but I don't start up a relationship for the sake of it so when I do it means that I'm really into the girl and I get caught up wanting to believe they are the same person from the first couple months of our relationship. My guard is down and like I said, they will put a show for the first couple months and I can't get past it. I get really when they end up being not quite who they originally portrayed. I just want to be happy but the lying and deceiving is something that is unforgiveable in my eyes. I want someone to be straight with me from jump.

That's why I figure if it's someone where we don't have to pretend interests then maybe it'd be healthy to build the trust from there..

Many people don't approach romantic relationships that honestly, because they have a vested interest in portraying themselves in the best light from jump street, even if they are being disingenuous. In the back of their heads, they believe that if they are their "true selves" from the beginning, they won't be able to snag the person they're pursuing, so they put up the facade until they reel that person in, and then their true feelings begin to show. It's like they aren't secure in the person they are.

A lot of people annoy me to the fiber of my being, and I'm a bit standoffish in general (some would consider this a negative, but having a little bit of a guard up keeps me objective), so putting up a front isn't/wasn't something I was interested in, even when it came to romantic relationships. I believe it helps me cut through the bullshyt a lot easier. It definitely helped me in my relationship with my husband, because I wasn't trying to impress him when we met. I didn't like him when we met LOL

You'll find that person that you just click with; probably gonna take some time and effort, but it'll happen.

 

[Saysumthinfunnymike]

Many people don't approach romantic relationships that honestly, because they have a vested interest in portraying themselves in the best light from jump street, even if they are being disingenuous. In the back of their heads, they believe that if they are their "true selves" from the beginning, they won't be able to snag the person they're pursuing, so they put up the facade until they reel that person in, and then their true feelings begin to show. It's like they aren't secure in the person they are.

A lot of people annoy me to the fiber of my being, and I'm a bit standoffish in general (some would consider this a negative, but having a little bit of a guard up keeps me objective), so putting up a front isn't/wasn't something I was interested in, even when it came to romantic relationships. I believe it helps me cut through the bullshyt a lot easier. It definitely helped me in my relationship with my husband, because I wasn't trying to impress him when we met. I didn't like him when we met LOL

You'll find that person that you just click with; probably gonna take some time and effort, but it'll happen.

Wow. This is exactly it. Putting aside how my last relationship ended (it's well documented on here), I allowed myself to fall in love with the "front" and never truly accepted that it was not really who she turned out to be. No excuses for her behavior, what she did to me was ridiculous and wrong but looking back, I never truly loved her. I loved the image and the character she portrayed. Like I said, I had my guard down and I wasn't recognizing the signs. I learn something from every relationship and I think what I'm gong to take into my next relationship is just to take a more objective approach and look deeper into who she really is before I start to catch feelings.

 

[Rusty Kuntz]

Wow. This is exactly it. Putting aside how my last relationship ended (it's well documented on here), I allowed myself to fall in love with the "front" and never truly accepted that it was not really who she turned out to be. No excuses for her behavior, what she did to me was ridiculous and wrong but looking back, I never truly loved her. I loved the image and the character she portrayed. Like I said, I had my guard down and I wasn't recognizing the signs. I learn something from every relationship and I think what I'm gong to take into my next relationship is just to take a more objective approach and look deeper into who she really is before I start to catch feelings.

I think being objective is the way to go, especially at the beginning. Some may say "how can you be objective when you're approaching a relationship that will involve emotions, especially when that initial attraction is already there?" I just think that it makes sense to use a little common sense. I guess it's a little easier for me because I have a Master's degree in Psychology (even though I don't practice professionally), so reading/observing people is something that just comes naturally to me.

 

[TrapWard-$crewston-TX]

buncha simps

 

[O.T.I.S.]

I think you should share about 50% of your common interests with your significant other



Like I like watching sports, working out, watching movies, and playing videgames..... and this is just for example


all she has to like is atleat 2 out of those 4 things. If she likes to workout and run COD with me after then perfect. If she likes to watch The Laker games and the newest movies/shows that I like then we good too