cyndaquil
Lv 100 Bold natured
So I’m at the airport in Amsterdam, chillin’ during my layover. I’m thinking, “I’m in Europe, nobody here knows what the hell TheColi is.” So I pull out my tablet, full screen, dark mode, front page threads about pawgs, Nas vs. Jay-Z, and browsing rafter threads got me crying laughing. I’m out here dapping posts like it’s a 9-to-5.
Then she walks by.
Tall, melanin-rich, African sister type you know that effortless beauty that makes your soul pause for a second? She catches me looking, gives me the look. Y’all know the look.
She doubles back, says hey, asks where I’m flying. I say “wherever you going
” with a smirk. She laughs, says “then I’m going where you’re going 
.” Energy immaculate.
Then she hits me with, “Are you here with your wife?”
I tell her, “Nah
.”
She goes, “Good, I’m not with my husband either
.”
At this point my inner Future was screaming Sensational.
So I say, “Add me on WhatsApp, we can talk.” She smiles and agrees. I hand her my tablet so she can type her number.
Then it happens.
She looks at the screen. Her smile fades. Her eyes squint. She turns to me slow like a movie villain reveal.
“…You’re on TheColi?”
Bruh. My soul LEFT my body.
I try to stammer out an explanation like, “Nah nah, I’m one of the GOOD ones! I just like the sports section!”
She just shakes her head like she’s seen evil itself. Says something in another language sounded like a prayer and walks away.
Gone. Just like that.
All because I had y’all open in full screen.
Now I’m sitting here by gate D52 reevaluating my life choices, wondering how the Coli stigma reached across continents.
I hate y’all for real
Then she walks by.
Tall, melanin-rich, African sister type you know that effortless beauty that makes your soul pause for a second? She catches me looking, gives me the look. Y’all know the look.
She doubles back, says hey, asks where I’m flying. I say “wherever you going
” with a smirk. She laughs, says “then I’m going where you’re going .” Energy immaculate.Then she hits me with, “Are you here with your wife?”
I tell her, “Nah
.”She goes, “Good, I’m not with my husband either
.”At this point my inner Future was screaming Sensational.
So I say, “Add me on WhatsApp, we can talk.” She smiles and agrees. I hand her my tablet so she can type her number.
Then it happens.
She looks at the screen. Her smile fades. Her eyes squint. She turns to me slow like a movie villain reveal.
“…You’re on TheColi?”
Bruh. My soul LEFT my body.
I try to stammer out an explanation like, “Nah nah, I’m one of the GOOD ones! I just like the sports section!”
She just shakes her head like she’s seen evil itself. Says something in another language sounded like a prayer and walks away.
Gone. Just like that.
All because I had y’all open in full screen.
Now I’m sitting here by gate D52 reevaluating my life choices, wondering how the Coli stigma reached across continents.
I hate y’all for real
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Nasty Brehz Would Been Nasty To Her Globally 
