Child_Of_God
Jesus is king of kings and lord of lords.
And what is the true intent of the bible?
To keep us away from sin and more closer to Jesus and God.
So nikkas were pulling out these bytches back in biblical times?!?!
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To keep us away from sin and more closer to Jesus and God.
God: YOUR SKEETS SHALL BE INTERNAL
Fux noFrom that excerpt, pulling out sounds like a sin...that's what you should be concerned about
@skeetsinternal is being righteous after all
newworldafro
DeeperThanRapBiggerThanHH
6 Judah got a wife for Er, his firstborn, and her name was Tamar.
7 But Er, Judah’s firstborn, was wicked in the LORD’s sight; so the LORD put him to death.
8 Then Judah said to Onan, “Sleep with your brother’s wife and fulfill your duty to her as a brother-in-law to raise up offspring for your brother.”
9 But Onan knew that the child would not be his; so whenever he slept with his brother’s wife, he spilled his semen on the ground to keep from providing offspring for his brother.
10 What he did was wicked in the LORD’s sight; so the LORD put him to death also.
So purposefully skeeting outside the vagina is a death sentence
MischievousMonkey
Gor bu dëgër
Nah, breh
Er was out here fukkin up and God struck him down
Er's father, Judah, asked his next oldest son, Onan, to step up.
Marry Er's widow and bear children with her.
Onan was like "fukk that. If we have kids, I won't inherit any of my brother's shyt. I got a plan."
So Onan decided to rock the p*ssy and pull out on some "I dont know why she aint getting pregnant! Must be her! Definitely aint me cuz I was in that thang, wasn' t I baby?"
God was like
Onan was likeand then
The Bible has plenty of very wild stories in it.
I need you to post more of these
yardman
Afro-pessimist
The letter J didn't exist back in those days.
The German word for masturbation derives from this brehs name. It's onanieren, which loosely translates to pulling an onan
Software
RIP Future Gohan
Lmao the smilies made this storyNah, breh
Er was out here fukkin up and God struck him down
Er's father, Judah, asked his next oldest son, Onan, to step up.
Marry Er's widow and bear children with her.
Onan was like "fukk that. If we have kids, I won't inherit any of my brother's shyt. I got a plan."
So Onan decided to rock the p*ssy and pull out on some "I dont know why she aint getting pregnant! Must be her! Definitely aint me cuz I was in that thang, wasn' t I baby?"
God was like
Onan was like
The Bible has plenty of very wild stories in it.
You should make a thread with abridged tellings of the old testament Bible stories with coli smilies
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Nah, breh
Er was out here fukkin up and God struck him down
Er's father, Judah, asked his next oldest son, Onan, to step up.
Marry Er's widow and bear children with her.
Onan was like "fukk that. If we have kids, I won't inherit any of my brother's shyt. I got a plan."
So Onan decided to rock the p*ssy and pull out on some "I dont know why she aint getting pregnant! Must be her! Definitely aint me cuz I was in that thang, wasn' t I baby?"
God was like
Onan was like
The Bible has plenty of very wild stories in it.
1 Timothy 4:1 (KJV) Now the Spirit speaketh expressly, that in the latter times some shall depart from the faith, giving heed to seducing spirits, and doctrines of devils;Is the Bible all a joke to you or something?
2 Corinthians 4:3-4 (KJV) But if our gospel be hid, it is hid to them that are lost:
In whom the god of this world hath blinded the minds of them which believe not, lest the light of the glorious gospel of Christ, who is the image of God, should shine unto them.
To most, yes breh. Let's pray for the blind and lost, brother.
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