Tell a True Short Story About Yourself

[Max Headroom]

I thought this thread was gonna be funny

 

[MischievousMonkey]

2009 August

me and my breh from high school decided to catch up cause we ain't see each other in a hot minute.

I was bumping nothing but Drake at the time (him and Gucci was all I listened to from '09-10) and he was really into them XXL, rappers-rapper types.

so we decide to hit up a local hole in the wall spot in the town next over, catch up and talk to some girls

we blasting music all the way there, talking shyt, trying to holler at girls in they car etc young breh shyt

we pull up in the club and we lowkey the freshest ones there.

Then we see this one guy there, kinda awkward looking, and dressed bummy as hell. yellowish looking ones, pants that needed a little ironing and a shirt with a stretched out neck.

so we get to making a scene, doing the "head ass, looking ass" chit we do up here. we gunned the fukk outta homie in front of everybody, and his comebacks was trashed and we could tell breh was getting heated af, so he bounced

then we get to talking to these two girls that was there, baddies not from the area, my boy did the talking and i kinda eased my way into the convo and ended up getting the girl I peeped to laugh and really had fun talking to her.

so we get ready to go dancing and the breh from earlier we was heating tried to bum rush me away from shorty, I had to shove the breh out the way hit him with the and he just staring at her looking straight going "oh for real?"

and we BOTH had to explain to breh just cause shorty danced on you (obviously out of pitty) don't really mean shyt like that...except for me and my mans so buddy walks away shaking.

had a couple of drinks, exchanging numbers, facebook etc. they said they were bout to hit up a friends spot nearby and we should come thru.

me and my mans wait a bit after they leave , when we did that air hit us and was just feeling good and faded af.

we hop in my boys car and get to rolling us one, and we geeked cus lowkey these girls was a bit out of our league

but then my side of the door swings open and the breh who we made fun of earlier, punches the shyt out of me , I get out the car ready to throw hands but his buddy runs a bit in the middle of the parking lot, and he's with at least four of his guys with him.

So now me and my mans standing in this parking lot arguing back and forth calling him all kinds of bytches, lame, broke, fukkboy etc. and his little clique trying to get us to throw hands.

so buddy gets the biggest dude in his group to fight me and I say "you a straight bytch, you need another nikka to fight for you."

then them nikkas just flat out charged us brehs

i got a few hits in but when I say they beat the breaks off of us boy, we managed to push them off of us, and they bounced, the lame nikka with the stretched out shirt was hollering "ON GD we just whooped them nikkas on GD!" which is funny cuz I was a GD but I cut all that shyt after high school.

so me and my mans in the car straight and we start driving to the spot, we get there, hop out and as we walk up to the apartment building they was at my mans hit me with the "tell em we won." cuz we was had a few scrapes, torn shirts, busted lip etc.

and best believe later that night, after shorty talking my ears off about being a nurse, got all up in them guts.

That's what I came in to read

Good ass story

 

[Hellmont]

L

What y’all nikkas wanna read I got a near death experiences, I got ones of getting laid and I got tragedies

Lets hear that Near Death Experience

 

[Idaeo]

Life is nothing but a collection of tears, happy and sad.

 

[BruhManFromTheFifthFlo]

Get money and fukk these hoes in the ass

 

[Clay Puppington]

I was in my friends car as he hit the back of an ambulance going like 80
If i wasnt sitting behind the drivers seat i woulda flown thru the windshield
When he crashed he was like "yo we have to get out of here" - i think he was riding dirty. He unbuckled breh in the front seat and we dipped out the car and hopped a fence and ran into some backstreets
The car caught fire and exploded
Very very awkward next 30 minutes. All you heard was steps and "bro im sorry" x 100

Be a couple inches from death brehs

 

[Poetical Poltergeist]

One night when I was young, maybe 12 in at home, a friend of mine was staying the night he lived just a couple houses down. We were up playing Nintendo and shyt, had to be around midnight. My parents were asleep.

The phone rings and I hurry up to answer it because I didn't want my parents to wake up (When people had land lines yall).

A voice screams "get your parents it's a fukkin emergency!"

I run my ass upstairs as fast I could, swing open their door and my dad sits up.
I'm like "someone's on the phone says it's an emergency!"

My mom immediately wakes up and yells my older brothers name. My dad gets on the phone and I knew it's bad. Just don't know how bad.

My dad somewhat calmly puts the phone down and looks at my mom, she's already crying.

Ronnies been shot, he's been taken to the hospital. My mom doesn't know what to say. Ronnie is my oldest brother, the name my mom screamed out was My 2nd oldest bro. They were together tho at a party.

My dad starts getting dressed and at the same time he's muttering and cussing " I told them not to be going to those places, God dammit, son of a bytch" he's pissed but I know he's really worried too.

My mom is a wreck but she gets dressed too and out they go. I have a little sister who was sleeping so I stood home worried like a motherfukker.

So my dad finally calls with the outcome...my brother been shot in the head and severely beaten. But he's alive and stable. My other brother is fine. They were at a party and some gang members showed up and a big fight went down. My bro was beaten with rakes, Shovels and stomped out. One dude pulled out a gun and shot him but he was a bad shot and bullet grazed his head and ricocheted off the pavement.

When my bro saw him he was soaked in blood and when the cops showed up they just sais to my brother, that's what happens when you in a gang.

I go the next morning to see Ronnie and I couldn't even recognize him. He was beaten so bad his head and face were so swollen i just started crying.

I always remember that phone call though and the voice on the other end who I still don't know who it was. And scares me because I almost lost my bro that night.

 

[Kaypain]

Most fukked up day in my life

School was out for President's day and I was home playing GTA San Andreas. I was doing the home invasion mission. I hear a open and close. My peoples were supposed to be at work so I go down like wtf. Next time I know a nikka with a gun pop telling me to get down

I was robbing a nikka on a video game and that shyt turned into a reality

More details: https://www.thecoli.com/threads/mos...e-in-my-life-true-story.393796/#post-17378642

 

[Boogie]

Some hating ass nikkas killed my homie. So me, his older bro and some of his homies rode out looking for em. I bytched up and they dropped my ass off.

I still regret that to his day

 

[Jasonmask]

L

Lets hear that Near Death Experience

Ok one time I was at a broads 25th bday party and we all went to the lake. It was me 2 hoes and a Mexican there’s life guards and the whole shyt there so I’m feeling secure because even though I like the water nikkas can’t swim all like that . The lake is mad swallow and there’s a restricted area where the lake gets deep. My dumb ass swimming trying to get just a little to the restricted area because it’s dumb ass families in the lake safe area just splashing water and doing the most. I try to put my feet down to find a surface and I just feel more and more water. Mind you I can’t swim like that I do that dog paddle/frog swim underwater I dip my head up a couple times flailing my arms and shyt hoping them cac life guards see me they don’t . So now I’m running out of breathe fast panicking. I remember talking to this pawg about painful ways to die and she was saying how drowning isn’t painful because if you accept the death and start swallowing water, your organs will get overflowed before you feel the death of suffocation. I was thinking like fukk it I’ll take her advice but I wasn’t going to just lay there and drown I was swimming underwater for a good couple of minutes just swallowing mad merky lake water thinking I wasn’t Gon make it back to the safe but man when nikkas got a hold of that rope and rose from the surface I never gasped that hard for air before. I’ve had similar scares in the deep end of a pool but nowhere near to this severity. Them bytches was all shocked like “ damn jasonmask I didn’t even know you was struggling over there “ had I not remembered that convo that may have been it for me.

Another one was when I was 19. Me and this other nikka finessed a cac outta 350 and he was talking all kinds of crazy how he merked nikkas before and hella shyt thinking it was scaring me like nikka I was beefing with like 20 hard crazy nikkas at that time I was looking at him like . He was small fry in comparison to the nikkas I was beefing with fast forward a few weeks later and I go link up with my plug for some zips. I knew something was up when I met up with him and the cac that I finessed was there. I wasn’t unaware of a set up as prior to that I’ve set up a dozen times and can smell one from a mile away. Anyways me and the plug usually smoke the tree he sell as a sample so I know what kind of shyt I’m getting and if the price is worth it.

Another red flag was this cac said we couldn’t smoke on the car some bullshyt about his parents so we start walking towards these woods that are somewhat secluded. I was on my toes head ona swivel then I out of nowhere I get a call from the folks talking about where was I at and I needed to come home( had a burner phone at the time shyt was pre paid) told them I had to go because I was on my last minute and I mean ass soon as I put my head down for moment to put my phone in my jacket this cac punch me hard af. We was walking up a hill and I was at the end so I fell back.

That whole shyt felt slow motion like fukk, I remembered him telling me he was shanking nikkas and that punch felt too strong from someone that small so the adreanine kicked in and I rolled up back up and ran to the main streets. I start seeing mad blood pour out my clothes fast as I’ve ever seen blood pour out my body. The most fukked up part was I was leaking heavy pleading with a couple of random people (it was like an Asian dude on a bike and some Asian lady separate occasions) and they were acting like I was trying to rob them or something. I knew asking people on the street wasn’t going to get me anywhere so I went to a catholic school and luckily I was in a The cac part of the city and I just ran in there remember just feeling crazy thirsty and I ran into a i think a teachers meeting. I remember them cacs asking me what was wrong I told them to call 911 I’ve been stabbed and the police came fast af right before I was starting to lose consciousness. (Side note when I got to the hospital I was flexing on the nurses because they told me I needed a blood transfusion based on the amount of blood loss and I needed surgery. I told them fukk that I don’t want a blood transfusion because that’s how my grandmother got lymphoma and died. Even after they told me it would be riskier I told them I did not care and I was not doing a BF.)

 

[Hellmont]

good read