I make decent money. If my Wife made 70K a year and I made 70K a year, we might be even. We have two small children (1 and 3). Day car in Atlanta costs between $1500-2500 a month. That was when we were looking 2 years ago for one child. We chose to go the home maker route for two reasons. One, we don't want our children being taken care of until they can communicate to us. Two, why would we give somebody 3K a month to watch our children?
Being a homemaker is tough. It's not popping in DVDs and drinking wine all day. Your Wife pops out your big headed child, uses her body to feed that child every 2-4 hours, prays the baby is latching properly and gets all the milk it can, prays the child sleeps without her so she can take care of herself, hopes the baby isn't colic and screams all day and night, all of this for 6 months. You have to keep the house clean, cook breakfast lunch and dinner, continue to do the shopping and run errands, and keep the fed clean and dry.
Soon the six month old starts crawling. You cant contain the little one. It wants you all the time. It only takes two naps a day. Can you imagine trying to cook and clean with a little ankle bitter wanting all your attention? If you are out of sight it begins to throw a fit. Also trying to get it to sleep through the night without you. Fast forward to a year. Little one is walking and getting into s--t. Still needs and wants all your attention. Now you are hoping it sleeps in its own bed so you can get some piece and quiet. You are are watching for milestones and trying to develop them. You are trying to engage with your little one and find the great moments throughout the day. Floors have to be cleaned, dishes washed, clothes washed, and errands ran.
Baby makes it to two. Finally, you consider a half time day care so you can get some me time and stuff done. Half time day care is $1K. Is it worth it when your a "stay at home mom"? You already know it is. Now you can hit the gym, clean the house, meal prep, run some errands without having to worry.
You put your child's safety with somebody else. That is scary. Because of social media, you hear and see all the stories of the whole world. Despite all that, you still do it for your mental health. Guess what? Every time our daughter seen the day care owner, she cries. That's odd right? That woman probably did something to our child. I promise you that.
Now you decide you want another one.
Run that back haha. I'm gone half the year. We have no support system. No village. That's not smart.
If we could swap positions, and she makes the money and I stay at home. You know what I would say... Naw. You got it.
My Wife got into three law schools before she got pregnant. One gave her a 75% scholarship. She wanted to be a lawyer from the age of six. We were going to wait but my little Brother died the summer of '18. That hit me hard and I asked for a child now. She said yes. We didn't realize what we were getting into. Life is hard when you are trying to be intentional. You continue to serve God, you try to strive for unity, and then put everything into the little ones, while trying to take care of yourself.
Seeing what my Wife goes through and what we go through when I am home. She deserves every single penny the judge orders.
That supposal support though Judge. Watch yourself. 3 years max. She already has my GI Bill.
Get married brehs and not expect to part with half of your empire you built together.
find a job or go broke and be homeless
