Y’all know my goofy ass. Bout to work my 2nd and new full time job. Before that I was working a part time at retail. I look like a teen despite being in my early 20s. This little 18 year old brehette there. She’s a coworker, I make her laugh a lot naturally just being myself but I hate to say it I like her. I know she has a boyfriend. Maybe I’m too autistic or low self esteem to catch the signs. Either she just find me that damn funny or she liking me.
She’s the only thing that felt real and organic on liking a girl lately. I’ll occasionally hook up with a girl on tinder or these shytty retail jobs. It’s just good sex, no magic. We can pillow talk and laugh but a relationship never comes from it.
I haven’t been there in a while but worked there the week before last. Friday and the girl I like was there. I made her laugh later that shift. I hate this. It’s not bout getting her or not. It’s just if I don’t get her which is fine. What’s next? This app shyt is getting old. My state is mostly white girls. nikka I don’t want to die alone.
Only sharing this shyt cause I’ve been drinking. This shyt has me so bummed out. I’m thinking of pursuing a career in entertainment again. I just want to be loved. I plan to move out my mom’s house in a year but I want to be loved. Don’t want to live life alone. She’s a cute brehette and likes my jokes. That’s all I want from life.