This a W or L for being a step father?

[The ADD]

He was mentoring her and her kids.

While sleeping with her unless I missed something……

Can’t separate one from the other

 

[Wildin]

While sleeping with her unless I missed something……

Can’t separate one from the other

Nah, you right, it is wise not to sleep with someone you are mentoring.

 

[#BOTHSIDES]

A breh says his step dad took him in along with his mom and two other siblings.

The woman asked if the step dad was a simp for that. He said nah but his mom said the step dad is a simp for taking them in and told her kids to never take in/marry a woman with kids

Ngl, my aunt told me to never marry a woman with kids…. She married a man who wasn’t her child’s father… her son married a woman with three kids… said for me to never do that.

 

[Rev Leon Lonnie Love]

I’m a step dad of 13 years, took in two kids at 10 and 6, and now they are about to be 23 and 19 (their mom is very successful though, great job, true professional, makes good money too.)

They respect me, at the same time, I’m not their dad (and their dad was not in their life.) I have my son now too who is 9, and she allows me to be the well rounded parent he needs, with him. I’m allowed to be the parent my step kids needed then. They both are smart and really capable, but did not have direction towards college, nor a pure career.

I blame my partner quite a bit to be honest.

It is a thankless job, I could not raise them as my own because their mom thought it was only her responsibility for discipline. Yet I pay some of their bills, went to their sports games, did homework with them etc.

It’s a thankless job, and being through it myself, I would recommend to almost everyone, don’t do it, in retrospect.

@CouldntBeMeTho

 

[Sire366]

@CouldntBeMeTho

It’s a lesson learned, and I don’t mind being honest to myself nor anyone who is thinking it. I’m not overt if it comes up with friends, it’s just, you have to accept you’re not a hero. The kids likely will not truly appreciate you, even worse is your partner doesn’t think long term it’s admirable and defines you (she appreciates it in the moment though.) She feels you chose her, and you did what you should do as a family man. Context means nothing to women.

I still really love her and we have a son that is truly a joy (we are still together, despite this site described story). It is thankless though, even your true friends around you views you not as a hero, or a strong guy, they are completely apathetic.

Also worth saying to everyone who gains insight from the post in this thread, my view is not meant for a woman with one kid, non abortion, or an early love. Like that happens, that’s not the relationship I’m bringing from my story. I have a friend who has a great marriage where she was in an army relationship right out of high school, they are done by 22, and the kid loves and appreciates him as does the mother.. everything has nuance

 

[JuvenileHell]

wow that guy's mother ain't shyt!

 

[Rekkapryde]

wow that guy's mother ain't shyt!

yup.

bro chose poorly.

we hear of all the horrible stepdad stories, but not the ones that are fine. Gotta keep the narrative going.

 

[Rick Fox at UNC]

 

[Rick Fox at UNC]

This made me laugh for five minutes. Thread delivered without even watching the Instagram nonsense.

It's like the saying the good die young. Society expects Good men to set aside their goals and to step up to back breaking work and you don't get nothing for it at the end of the day.





Thankless is definitely the word for it.

Bro, this is. Exactly.

 

[UnQuantized]

My life improved when I let go of the idea of being a good man. I figured this out early, put yourself first.

 

[Starman]

A single mother calling her man a simp is WILD

 

[Neuromancer]

Sad times.

 

[Starman]

Sad times.

It really is.

Children need father's. And step fathers are fathers.

But the path is so thankless, how can you tell a man to walk it?

Would-be single mom's are calling step father's simps for being with them and raising their kids

Like the inevitable "you not my daddy" line isn't bad enough...

Glad I never lived that life. But these kids need father's.

 

[Neuromancer]

It really is.

Children need father's. And step fathers are fathers.

But the path is so thankless, how can you tell a man to walk it?

Would-be single mom's are calling step father's simps for being with them and raising their kids

Like the inevitable "you not my daddy" line isn't bad enough...

Glad I never lived that life. But these kids need father's.

Yeah I have told single mothers I can't do it before but the FWB situation was in the table.

Sometimes I wonder why they don't try to get back with the child's father?

 

[Starman]

Sometimes I wonder why they don't try to get back with the child's father?

Cause he's probably a skreet dude on piru. Or he just don't want her.