This bytch closed. fukk u nikkas

The Intergalactic Koala

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Koalabama and the Cosmos
A insert from a book I am currently writing...I been so self conscious about doing such things but now or never I guess:

More Time

Its funny how time can scare the hell out of me. Especially free time to have so much on my mind that can’t be pushed to the side. Bless the individual who came up with labor, because a broken soul can work into the wee hours and beyond to avoid the hardships of their own mind. I used to hate workaholics because I am one for a different reason, but once the reality hit that I was working my pain away, I became a hypocrite.

Silly me for even wanting to escape my own issues to tackle other tasks! It is a grueling predicament that I tend to dwell upon. Part time hours seem to be my luck, but I desire more. I used to beg for more hours when I was married, than when I was alone because during that time I had the freedom to not give a crap about my own feelings. Now, I hope for week long endeavors and coming home to a game system of choice. Son whining for my attention can be greeted by my tired ways and my wife desiring my every move can see the back of my head. That is how I want it, but is that a form of living or just anticipating death around the corner.

Working as a retail worker, you have the characteristics of a chiseled dreamer without no direction but middle. No room for growth and no opportunity to go forward. Its limbo city with every bar open for your own self pity being wasted in front of the glass. Retail is like a way of society telling you that you are worthless and serve the successful and the centipedes of material worshippers. Yet, when it is all said and done, I had the time to do such duties of dealing with the arm pit of the general customer. I was so scared of such duties that when I go to a retail store, I end up being a part time volunteer as I bag my own groceries and wish wells to hurting workers. I feel the sting of the legs and the corns on my toes. I lick my lips at the dry spots from answering the same silly questions over and over again. Sadly, I have to put that all behind me to write this stupid book for those that need help into seeing that they are not crazy in this process of living. Time becomes the enemy every time the dial ticks from the wall to the smartwatch. It is apparent god truly hates us because we have to use time to the advantage or else its a wrap.

I took so many hiatuses to avoid typing up a page or two because I do not….sighs…I do not feel competent that you will read it.

Yes you! I have self doubt in myself because I feel that I am limited like my father in law stuck in that lazy boy watching “Gunsmoke”. He believed in one opportunity while everything else was just a mere blur to the ongoing traffic. Now that one talent of the man that held onto it like a panic attack is long gone with the rest of his entire soul in a broken stance of a shriveled body. Me, I am healthy and staring at this computer screen hoping that this will stick to the wall, because I could be doing more with my time but I chose to sit at the desk getting paid nada zero just to express that time is of the essence, while more time is a burden that can be achievable if you have the patience to withstand your own self doubts that you can be your very own boss…
 

Chez Lopez

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YAHUSHA HA MASHIACH
Creative writing go!

I need a square. Retail hell. Day-mare ticks...and ticks
"Do you carry golf clubs?"
Ughh..no lady.
Clocked out...right before clock in
I know she is following me
Pretending to shop
we don carry clubs ma'am
...believe it or not.
 

The Intergalactic Koala

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Koalabama and the Cosmos
Book is in 1st person?

A little bit of everything. Parts of my life, tackling the concepts of "paradise" and the realization that everything is not what it seems. Its a attempt of going into the depths of the woes of mental health from what I been through and so forth.
 
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