Thottydino Battle Royale: True Stories about THOTS Master Thread

[Brandeezy]

I tell you about this woman I had sexual relations with this weekend

So I'm on Facebook liking my friend's babies pics to let them I'm still in there life I guess

I peep this status of a female I been buttering up for a while she was overseas

She back home it's time for the kill

I hit her with my classic line that work all the time "let's chill"

She hit back like fine I hope you know I just want to chill

I'm like ok but in my head I'm whatever bytch don't play dumb

Boom set up the Netflix they had this movie I never seen before about a dude named Doc Ellis we watch that together

I brought some Budweiser limearitas because bytches lose all moral when they drink that

She was getting hungry but all I had was some honey buns, hot pockets and chicken flavored ramen noodles.

This bytch not getting the good shyt

So I put some noodles in microwave this bytch start complaining talking about where the hot sauce and shyt

I look at this greedy bytch like be grateful I made you dinner

After I'm watching the movie but not really like I'm half watching and half touching on her.

Doc Ellis would have been proud God rest his soul.

After a hour she buzzed and I been drinking water so I'm ready to take advantage

She laying on the bed and I'm getting undressed she like hold up you got to get it wet first

I'm like girl, I love eating p*ssy

Dive in that thing head first
I'm going 10 minutes strong

She begging for big daddy to just stick in

I said I'm bout to blow this bytch mind with this shyt

Flip her on her stomach and start eating the ass

Shyt didn't go as I planned because she had a hemorrhoid

So it's time to save face bout to hit this bytch with my signature move

Where I put the bytch on her back with her ass even on the edge of the bed with her legs up to allow for that extra bounce

Look in my drawer no condoms

I said fukk it she light skin so she good to go raw

Beating that thing up

She riding me now shyt was heaven

I'm like yo I'm bout to nut

She just moaning and shyt

Now I'm trying to lift her but she won't stop

Long story short busting inside her

And was blessed with my first son

#HarshRealities

 

[bl2k8]

I tell you about this woman I had sexual relations with this weekend

So I'm on Facebook liking my friend's babies pics to let them I'm still in there life I guess

I peep this status of a female I been buttering up for a while she was overseas

She back home it's time for the kill

I hit her with my classic line that work all the time "let's chill"

She hit back like fine I hope you know I just want to chill

I'm like ok but in my head I'm whatever bytch don't play dumb

Boom set up the Netflix they had this movie I never seen before about a dude named Doc Ellis we watch that together

I brought some Budweiser limearitas because bytches lose all moral when they drink that

She was getting hungry but all I had was some honey buns, hot pockets and chicken flavored ramen noodles.

This bytch not getting the good shyt

So I put some noodles in microwave this bytch start complaining talking about where the hot sauce and shyt

I look at this greedy bytch like be grateful I made you dinner

After I'm watching the movie but not really like I'm half watching and half touching on her.

Doc Ellis would have been proud God rest his soul.

After a hour she buzzed and I been drinking water so I'm ready to take advantage

She laying on the bed and I'm getting undressed she like hold up you got to get it wet first

I'm like girl, I love eating p*ssy

Dive in that thing head first
I'm going 10 minutes strong

She begging for big daddy to just stick in

I said I'm bout to blow this bytch mind with this shyt

Flip her on her stomach and start eating the ass

Shyt didn't go as I planned because she had a hemorrhoid

So it's time to save face bout to hit this bytch with my signature move

Where I put the bytch on her back with her ass even on the edge of the bed with her legs up to allow for that extra bounce

Look in my drawer no condoms

I said fukk it she light skin so she good to go raw

Beating that thing up

She riding me now shyt was heaven

I'm like yo I'm bout to nut

She just moaning and shyt

Now I'm trying to lift her but she won't stop

Long story short busting inside her

And was blessed with my first son

Nooooooo lol

 

[#SOG_soldier]

I tell you about this woman I had sexual relations with this weekend

So I'm on Facebook liking my friend's babies pics to let them I'm still in there life I guess

I peep this status of a female I been buttering up for a while she was overseas

She back home it's time for the kill

I hit her with my classic line that work all the time "let's chill"

She hit back like fine I hope you know I just want to chill

I'm like ok but in my head I'm whatever bytch don't play dumb

Boom set up the Netflix they had this movie I never seen before about a dude named Doc Ellis we watch that together

I brought some Budweiser limearitas because bytches lose all moral when they drink that

She was getting hungry but all I had was some honey buns, hot pockets and chicken flavored ramen noodles.

This bytch not getting the good shyt

So I put some noodles in microwave this bytch start complaining talking about where the hot sauce and shyt

I look at this greedy bytch like be grateful I made you dinner

After I'm watching the movie but not really like I'm half watching and half touching on her.

Doc Ellis would have been proud God rest his soul.

After a hour she buzzed and I been drinking water so I'm ready to take advantage

She laying on the bed and I'm getting undressed she like hold up you got to get it wet first

I'm like girl, I love eating p*ssy

Dive in that thing head first
I'm going 10 minutes strong

She begging for big daddy to just stick in

I said I'm bout to blow this bytch mind with this shyt

Flip her on her stomach and start eating the ass

Shyt didn't go as I planned because she had a hemorrhoid

So it's time to save face bout to hit this bytch with my signature move

Where I put the bytch on her back with her ass even on the edge of the bed with her legs up to allow for that extra bounce

Look in my drawer no condoms

I said fukk it she light skin so she good to go raw

Beating that thing up

She riding me now shyt was heaven

I'm like yo I'm bout to nut

She just moaning and shyt

Now I'm trying to lift her but she won't stop

Long story short busting inside her

I'm being blessed with my first son

 

[No..Money..Mo..Problems]

Breh really said he bout to have a son like he didn't claim this shyt happened last week

 

[VegasCAC]

I've put this on another thread, but :



When I was in college my second serious girlfriend told me these things every day:

I Love You

I'll never Hurt you

You're special and I want to show you that

Long story short- it turns out that the last two months we were together she was fukkING HER EX. Every single day. She was running game on him too, telling him they were back together. She was telling him the exact same shyt as above, just as convincingly.^ Me and him knew about each other's existence, but she was telling both of us the same story- "he's dating another girl , I haven't talked to him"

3-4 days a week for 2 months him or I were getting sloppy seconds

Same lies told to both of us.

So I eventually caught her when I peeped her phone when I was visiting her at work on her lunch break. Text: "Are you on your lunch break yet babe?" from a dude with the name of her ex. I was like She continued her psychopathic lying trying to deflect, but I had his number from before (another long story)

So she went back to work. And I hit this dude up. I asked "You still dating ____?" He said "Yeah... why?" And I was like "Damn, me too!"

So I'm like "My brother lets meet up"

We met up at a bar across the street, and started chopping it up in there . We start exchanging stories-

Me: "Was she with her sister shopping last Thursday?"

Him: "No dawg she was with me at dinner. Was she tired and had to go to bed at 8pm Friday?"

Me: "Nah dude we went to the club that night"

2 months of these stories

Finally, after a couple shots in I get a great idea- let's go meet her once she gets off work

So we end up waiting outside

She comes out scared shytless once she saw us. She knew it was over.

She just fukking powerwalks to her car and won't talk to either of us as we follow her.

I'm like "C'mon we're all friends! Don't you wanna talk to your boyfriends?

"We've all shared the same vagina its family over here!"

bytch got in her car and booked it.

Haven't seen her since.

 

[#SOG_soldier]

I've put this on another thread, but :



When I was in college my second serious girlfriend told me these things every day:

I Love You

I'll never Hurt you

You're special and I want to show you that

Long story short- it turns out that the last two months we were together she was fukkING HER EX. Every single day. She was running game on him too, telling him they were back together. She was telling him the exact same shyt as above, just as convincingly.^ Me and him knew about each other's existence, but she was telling both of us the same story- "he's dating another girl , I haven't talked to him"

3-4 days a week for 2 months him or I were getting sloppy seconds

Same lies told to both of us.

So I eventually caught her when I peeped her phone when I was visiting her at work on her lunch break. Text: "Are you on your lunch break yet babe?" from a dude with the name of her ex. I was like She continued her psychopathic lying trying to deflect, but I had his number from before (another long story)

So she went back to work. And I hit this dude up. I asked "You still dating ____?" He said "Yeah... why?" And I was like "Damn, me too!"

So I'm like "My brother lets meet up"

We met up at a bar across the street, and started chopping it up in there . We start exchanging stories-

Me: "Was she with her sister shopping last Thursday?"

Him: "No dawg she was with me at dinner. Was she tired and had to go to bed at 8pm Friday?"

Me: "Nah dude we went to the club that night"

2 months of these stories

Finally, after a couple shots in I get a great idea- let's go meet her once she gets off work

So we end up waiting outside

She comes out scared shytless once she saw us. She knew it was over.

She just fukking powerwalks to her car and won't talk to either of us as we follow her.

I'm like "C'mon we're all friends! Don't you wanna talk to your boyfriends?

"We've all shared the same vagina its family over here!"

bytch got in her car and booked it.

Haven't seen her since.

Repped

 

[Killer Instinct]

I have tales for days. Subs but I'll just drop this one really quick and revisit the thread tomorrow.

My brother and a close friend of ours left campus to go to the McDonald's directly down the street from our high school.
When they get back and park in the parking lot around the back of the school, chick who was pretty much known as the school jumpoff was on the steps with friends.
She eventually splits from her friends, gets into the back seat and strips for my brother & friend....for french fries.



Same broad ended up giving me a blowjob while me, my brother and our boys skipped class one afternoon at my boys place with some of her girls.
The thing with the blowjob is that she went back to school that afternoon and tongue kissed her boyfriend who was on the baseball team and had a game that evening.

 

[A.V.]

She was getting hungry but all I had was some honey buns, hot pockets and chicken flavored ramen noodles.

This bytch not getting the good shyt

So I put some noodles in microwave this bytch start complaining talking about where the hot sauce and shyt

Lost it right here

 

[General Mills]

I tell you about this woman I had sexual relations with this weekend

So I'm on Facebook liking my friend's babies pics to let them I'm still in there life I guess

I peep this status of a female I been buttering up for a while she was overseas

She back home it's time for the kill

I hit her with my classic line that work all the time "let's chill"

She hit back like fine I hope you know I just want to chill

I'm like ok but in my head I'm whatever bytch don't play dumb

Boom set up the Netflix they had this movie I never seen before about a dude named Doc Ellis we watch that together

I brought some Budweiser limearitas because bytches lose all moral when they drink that

She was getting hungry but all I had was some honey buns, hot pockets and chicken flavored ramen noodles.

This bytch not getting the good shyt

So I put some noodles in microwave this bytch start complaining talking about where the hot sauce and shyt

I look at this greedy bytch like be grateful I made you dinner

After I'm watching the movie but not really like I'm half watching and half touching on her.

Doc Ellis would have been proud God rest his soul.

After a hour she buzzed and I been drinking water so I'm ready to take advantage

She laying on the bed and I'm getting undressed she like hold up you got to get it wet first

I'm like girl, I love eating p*ssy

Dive in that thing head first
I'm going 10 minutes strong

She begging for big daddy to just stick in

I said I'm bout to blow this bytch mind with this shyt

Flip her on her stomach and start eating the ass

Shyt didn't go as I planned because she had a hemorrhoid

So it's time to save face bout to hit this bytch with my signature move

Where I put the bytch on her back with her ass even on the edge of the bed with her legs up to allow for that extra bounce

Look in my drawer no condoms

I said fukk it she light skin so she good to go raw

Beating that thing up

She riding me now shyt was heaven

I'm like yo I'm bout to nut

She just moaning and shyt

Now I'm trying to lift her but she won't stop

Long story short busting inside her

I'm being blessed with my first son

 

[Warren Moon]

Well let me tell you a story, a story of some trust fund white girls that went "slumming".

One Wednesday night a young been decided to have a party. Since half my friends weren't in school and the other half just didn't work shyt was going to be fat .



12 pm rolls around its my boys from high school about 3 of me and a couple dudes from college and 3 girls I met randomly. Basically shyt was wack

Either way we had liquor and some bytches that was aight. We end up talking to me and turns out they rich as shyt like they dads are millionaires well known in the city rich(they white).

So this bytches start getting live, fingering/kissing each other in front of all us while dancing just doing crazy shyt

So my nikkas from high school was on it .


My college boys was like I don't want a rape charge.

My one nikka just don't give a fukk so he starts fingering one of the chicks, imagine a dread head nikka that can barely speak dancing and fingering 2 whites girls dressed all preppy shyt was a once in a lifetime weird sight.

Now one of the girls feels uncomfortable she's like lets go its getting weird. But her other girls were like u never want to have fun ur lame so she gets up and gets a taxi

Now we got two girls and they just bust it wide open we started training one in my living room the other got taken to my room mates room it's 7 guys on two girls.

Somebody called somebody and next thing I know I got 5 dudes at my door on some .


The bytches complied they sucked and fukked them too, all together this shyt lasted like 3 hours like nikkas taking smoke breaks and coming back, switching with girls.


Some nikka took em home and idk what happened to em after that, I'm assuming they fulfilled their black man fantasies


We ended up using em that whole summer for random shyt like weed, gas, they cars, alcohol. Honestly could of got more but my young mind was only on those things at the time


One just got engaged and had 300+ likes on her fb to some white blazer wearing dude


The other is in Europe somewhere


Anyway shyt fukked up my whole thinking on females if I knew white trust fund babies that would marry "respectable" men were doing this with my lame ass God knows what normal females are doing out here

 

[Milk N Cookies]

@Milk N Cookies

The fukk you taggin me for?

Spoiler: the fukk you thought?

 

[#SOG_soldier]

The fukk you taggin me for?

Spoiler: the fukk you thought?

it dont have to be about you. It can be about other people you have heard about.



besides bae im not gonna judge you.

 

[Milk N Cookies]

im not gonna judge you

There were girls who used to openly talk about their 'dome services'... like in a thread i commented on a girl said she pretends 'it' is a cone of ice cream or a lolli pop and licks it that way as she says lalalalalalalalalala as she licks it. I went to school with a few bust downs.

 

[#SOG_soldier]

There were girls who used to openly talk about their 'dome services'... like in a thread i commented on a girl said she pretends 'it' is a cone of ice cream or a lolli pop and licks it that way as she says lalalalalalalalalala as she licks it. I went to school with a few bust downs .

drop some stories then :STLEBT:

 

[A.V.]

There were girls who used to openly talk about their 'dome services'... like in a thread i commented on a girl said she pretends 'it' is a cone of ice cream or a lolli pop and licks it that way as she says lalalalalalalalalala as she licks it. I went to school with a few bust downs.

A"friend", huh?