To the ladies: Why do you expect...

[-----]

I don't consider dating a light skin person being controlled by white supremacy it's only a problem when you put down other skin tone or a policy of absolutes when it comes to darker skin individuals.

Also I don't know anybody that goes by that team LS/DS I can't be associated with that foolishness.

So you down consider a clear preference for green eyes or lightskin and long hair as issue for males or females?

 

[agnosticlady]

Exactly. Yet somehow black men are colorstruck villains that hate their women. It goes both ways. I believe that Women are slightly more colorstruck than men.

Yup it goes both ways. That's why I hate when I see the black feminist running around screaming about black men being colorstruck self haters. I see it black women, and black mothers who program their children to think that way. I rarely if ever see black fathers running around talking about complexion and good hair.

It's equal between both genders the men and women who were heavily affected by it grew up in the same type households. Dark skin women are at the bottom of the food chain for the average man. More females of all races will date a dark skin man before males would date a dark skin women. And I say this as a guy that has dated plenty of dark skin chicks.

It's that way because dark skin is subconsciously portrayed as evil. Women in general should be associated with femininity, pleasant, good and etc so being dark skin to non black men is seen as not feminine. Many will sleep with a black woman, but many would not have them as their wife, because black women are not looked at as women to non black men.

 

[wild cherry blossom]

So you down consider a clear preference for green eyes or lightskin and long hair as issue for males or females?

Idk to be honest.

 

[Banned Account12]

nicca, what?

Thowd

 

[Audemar]

I expect you to be a man and control your own mind not let white people tell you what is beautiful.

Media and social conditioning has a greater effect on the mind than you think. It's the same reason why advertising of all forms will always be around.

 

[Raptor]

Yup it goes both ways. That's why I hate when I see the black feminist running around screaming about black men being colorstruck self haters. I see it black women, and black mothers who program their children to think that way. I rarely if ever see black fathers running around talking about complexion and good hair.



It's that way because dark skin is subconsciously portrayed as evil. Women in general should be associated with femininity, pleasant, good and etc so being dark skin to non black men is seen as not feminine. Many will sleep with a black woman, but many would not have them as their wife, because black women are not looked at as women to non black men.

 

[-----]

Yup it goes both ways. That's why I hate when I see the black feminist running around screaming about black men being colorstruck self haters. I see it black women, and black mothers who program their children to think that way. I rarely if ever see black fathers running around talking about complexion and good hair.



It's that way because dark skin is subconsciously portrayed as evil. Women in general should be associated with femininity, pleasant, good and etc so being dark skin to non black men is seen as not feminine. Many will sleep with a black woman, but many would not have them as their wife, because black women are not looked at as women to non black men.

Wheres all the colorism trolls at?

 

[agnosticlady]

I mean think about it. I can say that I do not like when some grown black men try to teach young black boys how to be players instead of intelligent, business minded, hardworking, and etc. On the other hand I mostly see black mothers saying things like, "Oh she got good hair", "Oh I want a light skinned baby", "Oh she needs a perm", and etc.
I remember being 11. or 12 and going to the hair salon with my sister when she was around 3/4. She has kinky curly wavy hair. There were a few black men that came in to drop of their daughters or just to talk to others. When the black women came in and saw my sisters hair they were all like, "Oh her hair is so nice. She got that good hair". I have seen the colorism stuff mostly from black women. They pass it on to their children. "Oh don't bring home a light skinned/dark skinned girl". A lot of black single mothers pass it on to their sons. Then these boys grow up saying, "I got to have a red bone with good hair". I rarely see a black boy grow into a man that is from a two parent household where the father has a strong presence speak about red bone this and that. Don't get me wrong regardless of family structure and etc ALL black people are affected by Eurocentric images, but I notice who suffers the most from it.

 

[wet landscapes]

Black women are not able to or allowed to be delicate, super feminine, protected, damsels in distress like our white counterparts. We are not placed on a pedestal of ultimate femininity.

Instead because of oppression and white supremacy, we are faced with obstacles that force us to be strong and resilient which is a different type of beauty. Not the one that is celebrated in mainstream media.

A black woman in a damsel in distress situation, is considered lazy and naive or even stupid. A black woman taking control of her life, triumphing through issues, is seen as independent and strong which often gets twisted through sexism and racism as masculine and domineering/unwilling to submit.

Though black men also suffer from the lazy stereotype, in the second situation where they take an active role benefit from the idea of masculinity in assertiveness and ambition. A black man who takes the victim role isn't likely to be respected.

A white woman who takes the victim/damsel in distress can rely on her privilege, desirability and status to be rescued or d for.

Black women often can't really win in either situation.

Sometimes tho, especially in the conscious community. A black woman in who takes an active role in her destiny, who doesn't sit on her laurels, can be seen as a queen. We just have to fight the stereotype of Sapphire.

I think black women are very delicate, but people buy into stereotypes....black women buy into it themselves
peel back some layers and a lot of black women are very sensitive and gentle
same with black men tbh
I wish we could just develop organically without society warping us

 

[CinnaSlim]

I think black women are very delicate, but people buy into stereotypes....black women buy into it themselves
peel back some layers and a lot of black women are very sensitive and gentle
same with black men tbh
I wish we could just develop organically without society warping us

Yeah, personally I'm very feminine shy and passive. But stereotypes are very pervasive. They get ingrained into our minds at a young age through media and interactions.

 

[Sassy]

Here the fukk we go.

 

[wet landscapes]

I mean think about it. I can say that I do not like when some grown black men try to teach young black boys how to be players instead of intelligent, business minded, hardworking, and etc. On the other hand I mostly see black mothers saying things like, "Oh she got good hair", "Oh I want a light skinned baby", "Oh she needs a perm", and etc.
I remember being 11. or 12 and going to the hair salon with my sister when she was around 3/4. She has kinky curly wavy hair. There were a few black men that came in to drop of their daughters or just to talk to others. When the black women came in and saw my sisters hair they were all like, "Oh her hair is so nice. She got that good hair". I have seen the colorism stuff mostly from black women. They pass it on to their children. "Oh don't bring home a light skinned/dark skinned girl". A lot of black single mothers pass it on to their sons. Then these boys grow up saying, "I got to have a red bone with good hair". I rarely see a black boy grow into a man that is from a two parent household where the father has a strong presence speak about red bone this and that. Don't get me wrong regardless of family structure and etc ALL black people are affected by Eurocentric images, but I notice who suffers the most from it.

none of my aunts are single (all married for years) and all my cousins date exoticals and redbones
I think it's kinda silly to think liking light skin is a symptom of fatherlessness

 

[agnosticlady]

none of my aunts are single (all married for years) and all my cousins date exoticals and redbones
I think it's kinda silly to think liking light skin is a symptom of fatherlessness

Clearly I stated that ALL black people are affected some way regardless of their family structure. It's not silly to notice that there are a lot of black children raised around single mothers who have self hate issues and talk about good hair and skin complexion. I also mentioned the father being in the house but not having a strong voice. I rarely if ever see a black father say his daughter NEEDS a relaxer, needs lighter skin, or say that he wishes she had looser hair/good hair.

 

[wet landscapes]

Clearly I stated that ALL black people are affected some way regardless of their family structure. It's not silly to notice that there are a lot of black children raised around single mothers who have self hate issues and talk about good hair and skin complexion. I also mentioned the father being in the house but not having a strong voice. I rarely if ever see a black father say his daughter NEEDS a relaxer, needs lighter skin, or say that he wishes she had looser hair/good hair.

my dad was like that, I'm pretty sure thats normal
he didn't like when my sister and I nor my mother looked busted
I remember him saying I couldn't wear my twistout as a teen
it has less to do with the gender role of your parent or parents and more about what their generation and particular social class found presentable and if they adapted with the changing times imo
never in my life have I heard a parent say some shyt about the skin color about who their kids date (tho I've only really met my females friends parents extensively)
that's a very shameless thing to do and I think the majority of parents would have more sense than that

 

[agnosticlady]

my dad was like that, I'm pretty sure thats normal
he didn't like when my sister and I nor my mother looked busted
I remember him saying I couldn't wear my twistout as a teen
it has less to do with the gender role of your parent or parents and more about what their generation and particular social class found presentable and if they adapted with the changing times imo
never in my life have I heard a parent say some shyt about the skin color about who their kids date (tho I've only really met my females friends parents extensively)
that's a very shameless thing to do and I think the majority of parents would have more sense than that

Again I am not talking about specific examples. I am talking about patterns that I see. I have seen many black mothers speak like that. I rarely if ever see black fathers worry about hair or skin complexion. Now your father was wrong. Particular social class doesn't really play a role.There are black people of all social classes that have self hate issues. Nope there are a lot of parents that do that. I have seen black mothers on many occasions freak out because their daughters new growth is coming in and get that kiddie perm.