Topic: Is a man paying all the bills, submissive behavior?
- Thread starter BrothaZay
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if you want to be a man in 2019, let go of this pimp mentaliy that is preventing you of taking care of business. men take care of women they sleep with. boys debate the topic at hand because nobody at home taught you that you have responsibility
Ezekiel 25:17
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If the kids are old enough to go to school on their own and do chores around the house, what exactly is the woman doing? There's 9 whole hours where the kids are at school and the husband is at work. What benefit does the man get besides cooking?
Vandelay
Life is absurd. Lean into it.
If you're doing it all...in conjunction with raising kids.
In my situation, I was still cooking, cleaning, doing dishes, fixing shyt, washing clothes, paying the bills...at the time I worked 3 jobs too.
What is he getting in return?
Just because I want to get to a point where I could cover everything comfortably on my own doesn't mean I particularly want to be placed in the position to do it.
But I will just say, with different responsibilities come different expectations. Meaning, if I'm the sole breadwinner, then what I expect of my spouse from a support/role standpoint would be quite different than what my expectations would be if we were tag teaming these motherfukkers.
That said, to answer the question ... it's not my business how other people do things in their households.
If it works for them, it's effective. I can't be mad at it. I probably wouldn't get down like that, but to that end I wouldn't co-habitate with someone unless I couldn't picture a future without them in it, i.e. we're in for the long haul. I'd be more likely to want to cover all the things if it was a wife we're talking about as opposed to a serious girlfriend. But it all depends on our mindset and how we're trying to build, etc.
But I will just say, with different responsibilities come different expectations. Meaning, if I'm the sole breadwinner, then what I expect of my spouse from a support/role standpoint would be quite different than what my expectations would be if we were tag teaming these motherfukkers.
That said, to answer the question ... it's not my business how other people do things in their households.
If it works for them, it's effective. I can't be mad at it. I probably wouldn't get down like that, but to that end I wouldn't co-habitate with someone unless I couldn't picture a future without them in it, i.e. we're in for the long haul. I'd be more likely to want to cover all the things if it was a wife we're talking about as opposed to a serious girlfriend. But it all depends on our mindset and how we're trying to build, etc.
it's a sign of independence imo. I don't need anyone to help with my bills.
Emphasis on MY. It's all my shyt and i can take care of myself. When i invite a woman into my life it's not because i'm looking for a roommate to half with.
But i do expected you to have your own moeny. You shouldn't be asking me for money at all. That's all i ask. I'll pay for stuff when customarily appropriate, dates, gifts etc. But you shouldn't expect me to taking you shoe shopping, and i won't ask you to pay my gas bill.
Emphasis on MY. It's all my shyt and i can take care of myself. When i invite a woman into my life it's not because i'm looking for a roommate to half with.
But i do expected you to have your own moeny. You shouldn't be asking me for money at all. That's all i ask. I'll pay for stuff when customarily appropriate, dates, gifts etc. But you shouldn't expect me to taking you shoe shopping, and i won't ask you to pay my gas bill.
UberEatsDriver
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- Brooklyn keeps on taking it.
I hate when some women use their parents logic failing to understand life is much more difficult today.
Like I always say. Asians, whites and Hispanics have elevated themselves to being partners while black folks are still trying to establish gender roles.
The reality is the women who support these things do not really care about gender roles they just want to live a life free of work.
Like I always say. Asians, whites and Hispanics have elevated themselves to being partners while black folks are still trying to establish gender roles.
The reality is the women who support these things do not really care about gender roles they just want to live a life free of work.
you mean beside's watching your back, how many men who are in nursing homes right now cacthing hell because they don't have a woman who care for them
Kenyan West
lazy fba philly nikka,
Yup. I don't care if I make 10k a month and she makes 2k. She's coming out of her pocket. Now, if this is my wife or the mother of my children, I'll handle everything.
It depends on how you want your relationship set up. People act like they HAVE to follow trends. Make your shyt work for you.
If you want your woman to be a stay at home wife and take care of everything in the home and the kids and not work, then do that. It has benefits.
If you want stuff to be 50/50 and you honestly know you will help hold down all other responsibilities outside of working as well, then do that.
Personally, I honestly never even contemplated this type of stuff before social media. If both of you are healthy and functioning from a place of love instead of control and psychological warfare, none of this shyt is even an issue. Stuff just falls into place and people do what they are best at and appreciate one another.
The problem is people don't want love in relationships, they want control, and validation and then wonder why everything seems hard.
If you want your woman to be a stay at home wife and take care of everything in the home and the kids and not work, then do that. It has benefits.
If you want stuff to be 50/50 and you honestly know you will help hold down all other responsibilities outside of working as well, then do that.
Personally, I honestly never even contemplated this type of stuff before social media. If both of you are healthy and functioning from a place of love instead of control and psychological warfare, none of this shyt is even an issue. Stuff just falls into place and people do what they are best at and appreciate one another.
The problem is people don't want love in relationships, they want control, and validation and then wonder why everything seems hard.
Peter Popoff
PROTECT YA NECK!! ❤️🖤💚 🙏🏽
Partnership >> submission
Even in our parents relationships, they helped one another out through tough times although women did not have equal opportunities in those days unlike now. Social media and confused idiots created this misconstrued idea of the man being the man and woman to break up the black families while white families are thriving off of partnership. I want a best friend, not a dog with a camera phone and a social media account.
Even in our parents relationships, they helped one another out through tough times although women did not have equal opportunities in those days unlike now. Social media and confused idiots created this misconstrued idea of the man being the man and woman to break up the black families while white families are thriving off of partnership. I want a best friend, not a dog with a camera phone and a social media account.
What always got me was my friends or guys I knew, that did this, and then COMPLAINED relentlessly, about it. The answer is a deep resentment of women, and desire to control and contain them through financial/emotional means.
Re: having a girlfriend who is under/unemployed/financially dependent
Re: having a girlfriend who is under/unemployed/financially dependent
Peter Popoff
PROTECT YA NECK!! ❤️🖤💚 🙏🏽
And to add to that, women with nothing going for themselves have no substance. What is there that y'all can talk about? Your goals, your career, your finances?
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