What marriage is REALLY about...... (long read)

[Groanman]

Here's a goofy ass conversation betwixt me and my ex-wife about a year before our divorce.

Wife: "I just want you to make me happy. You need to do this, that, and the other."
Me: "What exactly do you do to make me happy?"
Wife: "Well, I'm here with you."
Me:
Wife (after realizing what she had just said):






Fellas, the next time your S.O. yack and complain about you not making and keeping her happy, just ask her for details about her job to make you happy.

 

[malbaker86]

i will always love this photo

 

[Easy-E]

Ultimately, it has little to nothing to do with liking your significant other. The biggest reward from being in marriage is to CREATE A COMMUNITY

You can't even get these "PRO BLACK, BACK TO AFRICA" coli brehs to understand this.


EDIT: I don like how u hammered on the point of "Men = Leaders" but spend zero text about our responsibility and what exactly we're leading women to.

 

[Dafunkdoc_Unlimited]

There should be no leader, but equality like still milk in a glass..

False. 2 'leaders' in a relationship = lots of petty arguments over who takes out the trash, does the dishes, what channel to watch, etc.​

 

[BillBanneker]

Its crazy how lost a number of us in america really are. We have lost touch on what marriage is about. Ultimately, it has little to nothing to do with liking your significant other. The biggest reward from being in marriage is to CREATE A COMMUNITY. Hence, why in india they have arranged marriages because they have the priority of making a community first before liking or being in love with their significant other. The concept WAS supposed to serve everyone in humanity by giving us a certain order in which everyone could benefit from. The man is DESIGNED to create and apply order. He is the leader. He is to make sure everyone does their job. ALL MEN have a natural tendency to create order. The woman is DESIGNED to serve the man. The woman by DESIGN is not meant to be the leader. In general, women do not want to be the leader. They want A MAN. MAN=LEADER. She should follow the man's lead. ALL women have a tendency to follow a TRUE leader whether they admit it or not. Now when the woman has children their upbringing depends on the cooperation between the man and the woman. HOWEVER, this does not mean that they are equal. The man is to ALWAYS be the leader and the woman is to ALWAYS to follow the lead of the man. There CANNOT be equal partnership. Someone must be in the driver's seat.

This structure when done in numbers gives us the structure of a functional community. Everyone has a role and each role is ultimately constructive towards growing/maintaining a community.

Being constructive is language that is respected on a universal level.

(Ex. If you save a baby from a burning building it does not matter what your race,sexual preference, ethnic background etc is, the act will still be respected because it was constructive towards life.)


If there is something that you do not get/disagree about this post don't be afraid to ask/mention/reply. I promise I will not duck away from anything y'all say in this thread no matter how offensive you feel it may be.

So is this all just your opinion? Or you have some facts and stuff.

 

[s3ven_LvLs]

So it's not really about the couple? So how does the community benefit from our union?

Again, everyone has role aka something to do that is constructive. Think about it this way. Also when I explain this I want you to REMOVE any feelings that may arise and look at my response for what it is.

As kids grow up throughout their life they are exposed to certain order on how things are done. That way when they are old enough to support themselves they too know how to be constructive.

As a women typically get older they lose their "lust" factor. In general, when a woman does not have a "lust" factor or when she feels that the whole deal with being attractive and in the loop with dating on/off has gotten old she can now have something to look forward to and that is watching the seeds that she gave birth to grow up. In general, women do not like to date alot of dudes for a long amount of time. They want to find one that they think is the best and settle with him hence "hypergamy". Marriage gives the woman a security of knowing that someone has her back and will make the best decisions for her and her needs. In general, women do not like to make decisions that have big responsibilities. They like decisions that have low responsibility like "Should I go with the blue dress or the red dress". They want a man to take on big responsibilities like "How severe should I punish Johnny for acting up in school". In general, women do not want to be hated and making decisions like that will garner resentment. A true leader does not care if he is hated, as long as the constructive order stays together.

Men being the leader maintains the stable constructive order throughout the relationship. The benefit for him is that he is the leader so only he is final word. No one can boss the leader around. Also, he will get satisfaction from being the leader because that is what he is DESIGNED to do. It is tough being the leader but it gives a certain amount of respect that actually raises your quality of life. A man will feel wanted because he is doing something good and providing for his family. He will have a purpose for living.

 

[no.]

Marriage is an institution with many, many manifestations to it. Marriage in rural India isn't marriage in medieval Europe, isn't marriage in Tibet, isn't marriage in modern America. Different cultures have different sets of values How can you not grasp that?

 

[Tha Sircus]

Again, everyone has role aka something to do that is constructive. Think about it this way. Also when I explain this I want you to REMOVE any feelings that may arise and look at my response for what it is.

As kids grow up throughout their life they are exposed to certain order on how things are done. That way when they are old enough to support themselves they too know how to be constructive.

As a women typically get older they lose their "lust" factor. In general, when a woman does not have a "lust" factor or when she feels that the whole deal with being attractive and in the loop with dating on/off has gotten old she can now have something to look forward to and that is watching the seeds that she gave birth to grow up. In general, women do not like to date alot of dudes for a long amount of time. They want to find one that they think is the best and settle with him hence "hypergamy". Marriage gives the woman a security of knowing that someone has her back and will make the best decisions for her and her needs. In general, women do not like to make decisions that have big responsibilities. They like decisions that have low responsibility like "Should I go with the blue dress or the red dress". They want a man to take on big responsibilities like "How severe should I punish Johnny for acting up in school". In general, women do not want to be hated and making decisions like that will garner resentment. A true leader does not care if he is hated, as long as the constructive order stays together.

Men being the leader maintains the stable constructive order throughout the relationship. The benefit for him is that he is the leader so only he is final word. No one can boss the leader around. Also, he will get satisfaction from being the leader because that is what he is DESIGNED to do. It is tough being the leader but it gives a certain amount of respect that actually raises your quality of life. A man will feel wanted because he is doing something good and providing for his family. He will have a purpose for living.

Right i follow your concept. But how does the community benefit from this type of social structure?

 

[Poitier]

Marriage is an institution with many, many manifestations to it. Marriage in rural India isn't marriage in medieval Europe, isn't marriage in Tibet, isn't marriage in modern America. Different cultures have different sets of values How can you not grasp that?

It doesn't matter as long as it exist in some form.

 

[s3ven_LvLs]

Wrong friend, just wrong..

Marriage is purely based on love, the equality of both counterparts..

They must have an equal balance of receiving and giving love..

Controlling behavior should not be tolerated, as a man should not be the leader..

There should be no leader, but equality like still milk in a glass..

Sexist behavior shouldn't be tolerated friend..

Its so sour..

Best wishes..

You really think that back before TV and movies that men and women in general would stay together for a lifetime because they love each other like they did when they first met. People get tiring to deal with period.

@HEISENBURG2291
Most Women never had a problem with men being legitimate leaders, many preferred it as it was less responsibility, but found that they had to step up when their man was a weak leader or didn't know what the hell he was doing. You can't have two followers in a pair, if you show that your leadership skills are worthy, you will garner authentic respect. You don't just get respect automatically by having the right genitalia.

Also, please discontinue referring to any social relationship structure in India when trying to make your points. We don't want our community to have that level of poverty, infanticide, rape, abuse, child marriage and even marriage to animals.

India has a billion people. They understand exactly what I'm trying to tell you. It has educated and uneducated people just like anywhere else. Don't generalize off of what you see in the media.

 

[no.]

It doesn't matter as long as it exist in some form.

Yes, but this guy is advocating a marriage model that does not fit within modern western culture, man. He's screaming out submiiiiiiiiit, when nowadays a working woman is perfectly capable of supporting herself. His argument lays in bullshyt like women being "mentally weak" and "unable to handle the responsibility of big decisions." I sure hope he stays single.

 

[Claudex]

It doesn't matter to me as long as it exist in some form.

FTFY breh

 

[s3ven_LvLs]

Right i follow your concept. But how does the community benefit from this type of social structure?

Everyone has a role. You can build activities off their role. A marriage is supposed to be for a lifetime so even after kids grow up, the parents will still have something to do. The community will not have men and women wandering around aimlessly. A man in his correct mind is always constructive whether it be inventing/building something or just getting friends to come over and have a cookout. The woman would follow the man's lead.

 

[Poitier]

FTFY breh

Nope thats dumb nikka talk


I have 50,000 years of human history backing my assertion

 

[s3ven_LvLs]

Yes, but this guy is advocating a marriage model that does not fit within modern western culture, man. He's screaming out submiiiiiiiiit, when now a days a working woman is perfectly capable of supporting herself. His argument lays in bullshyt like women being "mentally weak" and "unable to handle the responsibility of big decisions." I sure hope he stays single.

Where did I say the bolded. That would not be true as if it was there would be no woman doctors/lawyers etc.