After my 2nd bid, where my own "man" (a nikka I supported financially and mentally) sold me up the river for 7 months time served and I had 4 years of isolation, betrayal, reflection and abandonment all to myself to contemplate the worth and meaning of life.
shyt really hit me during a stretch where I spent 6 months straight in the hole for takin flight on a C.O., and consequently I was locked in an 8 x 10 shytbox with no visits, my mail slowed up drastically, no phone calls, and I was relegated to two showers a week and NO rec time at all...First time not seeing the sun or a blade of grass for half a year in my life.
During this period I suffered a severe eye infection from an allergic reaction to dust and mold that was inherently inside of my cell and nearly lost an eye but was refused medical attention for months until I was transferred from the County jail to the State system...all while getting news in a 3 week span that I lost two of my closest family members and a dear friend of mine who returned to The Essence. fukk it, I'm ALL about that life. I just aint FOR it. These fukk boys can keep that shyt, nikkas ain't playin fair nowadays anyway.
Self-employed 2nd year college student & personal trainer now.