When y’all say focus on yourself, what exactly does that mean?

[Solo ✧✦✧]

Improve yourself, ignore the opposite sex, and don't compare yourself to others. A very vague statement that most people don't even follow.

 

[CrimsonTider]

Yeah. Because some simp living in an alternative reality who doesn’t wanna acknowledge and accept the TRUE nature and current status of the social media era woman can make judgements and cast aspersions about my life. I’ve reached a pinnacle of success most only hope for by focusing on my goals and not letting a no good, money grubbing bytch distract me or sidetrack me. Wanna play big bank take little bank?

This is the thread for you

Keep pretending to be something you’re not in rap life somewhere else

 

[Guess Who]

Man I got in shape, increases my income by $40k in two years, met a dime that I married, etc etc and I did all that while smoking, drinking, clubbing, fapping, whatever. Which is to say it’s possible to grow while still engaging in your vices (to SOME extent). That said, for me this means to identify what I want in life as well as who do I ideally want to be as a person and then to figure out the ways in which I need to develop to achieve those things. As an example, I realized that my people skills needed work so I spent A LOT of time going out and socializing. So it’s just really about figuring out what you want for you and your life and finding what you need to build or change to get there—then doing the research on how to make those changes, building a strategy and then implementing it.

 

[Kwabena]

Improve yourself, ignore the opposite sex, and don't compare yourself to others. A very vague statement that most people don't even follow.

Why ignore women? Even the ones you don’t have a romantic relationship with

 

[Solo ✧✦✧]

Why ignore women? Even the ones you don’t have a romantic relationship with

Ask the people that keep repeating the "focus on yourself" phrase. I didn't make the rules for it.

 

[Diondon]

On yourself, you must focus

 

[Gold]

?

Breh wtf you think it means?

Its not difficult

 

[lightbearerchef]

Breh if you cant understand basic terminology yo parents failed you

 

[-deleted-]

Why ignore women? Even the ones you don’t have a romantic relationship with

I don’t want to tell other brehs to do this, but I definitely did. There was a point I wouldn’t even look at women when I passed them in the street. Didn’t speak to them unless spoken to. I resented them for not wanting me. It was what it was.

YOU dont have to do that though. I was just a lame not getting any buns so I would just ignore women I’d be attracted to because I knew they wouldn’t feel the same

 

[-deleted-]

Man I got in shape, increases my income by $40k in two years, met a dime that I married, etc etc and I did all that while smoking, drinking, clubbing, fapping, whatever. Which is to say it’s possible to grow while still engaging in your vices (to SOME extent). That said, for me this means to identify what I want in life as well as who do I ideally want to be as a person and then to figure out the ways in which I need to develop to achieve those things. As an example, I realized that my people skills needed work so I spent A LOT of time going out and socializing. So it’s just really about figuring out what you want for you and your life and finding what you need to build or change to get there—then doing the research on how to make those changes, building a strategy and then implementing it.

Different strokes, everyone is different. I’m glad this worked out for you though, good shyt

 

[Sensitive Christian Grey]

I’ll give you the real answer no one wants to hear:

It honestly means you have to focus time and effort away from vices and possibly guilty pleasures. The club, women, alcohol, drugs...Usually when guys say this it means going to the gym, getting your money up, getting a degree, a cert, etc...Anything that helps your life on paper.

What they won’t tell you is that this is going to be a very lonely road. At times it feels like a chore. At times it can feel like you’re just chasing a goal that takes forever. And, it can be very boring at times. But the journey is what makes you focused.

There was a point where I ignored women for months and just focused on the gym. They didn’t want me anyway when I would approach and pursue, so I just went ham on my fitness... Not even for women neither, because at that point I internalized it that getting someone to like me back was a lost cause, so let me just love myself. It sounds weird but it’s true. Anyway, I would go to the gym day in and day out. My health was on point and I felt invincible. Fell off the path for a bit, but I’m steadily getting back to where I was. It was VERY boring at first, but once I made it a routine it wasn’t that bad. You’re gonna get frustrated and you might spend some Friday nights solo.

But, it’s worth it.

A big part of it is examining your life from the standpoint of reconciling contradictions between your stated goals and behaviors

Very conclusive posts

 

[King Eros]

Don't listen to the opinions of others, instead spend enough time alone to get in touch with your God self.

Acknowledge your true desires and create some meaningful goals.

Follow your passions with persistence.

Become the best version of yourself.

For men, it also means become a leader.



(tldr; stay off social media, stop hoe chasing, and get your shyt together)

 

[re'up]

It has become something of a meaningless phrase in our modern language of instagram and Facebook updates.

 

[Ya' Cousin Cleon]

because for nikka nerds and lames, women are simply meant to be conquered since they offer nothing else

which of course is just pseudo intellectual babel

Why ignore women? Even the ones you don’t have a romantic relationship with

 

[phcitywarrior]

Why ignore women? Even the ones you don’t have a romantic relationship with

I think the point is to really just hone in on a few things that would improve YOUR current situation. It's very possible to maintain a relationship while focusing on your grind. I think the advice is usually for single dudes who have more casual relationships with women rather than something substantial.

Let's keep it a brick, juggling multiple women takes time, effort and sometimes $. The time spent chasing women is time not trying to achieve your goals.

I think @BlackAchilles said it best, essentially examining where you are now and where you want to be in X amount of time and executing against a plan to bridge that gap. We live in a world with more and more distractions. Sometimes you really just need to go into hibernation mode for a little bit and get in your bag.

I honestly think this phrase or outlook should be praised more in the community. Discipline, persistance and delayed gratification.