Why are men expected to provide and protect?

[HarlemHottie]

Sex is like the tires on a car for me. Yes you need tires to drive but it ain't the entire car. Sex is important for a relationship but it's not the end all or be all for being with a woman.

I would rather a woman who I can trust fully and that I can use to help reach my goals(vice versa for her).
I look at a relationship as a partnership and I wouldn't deal with any woman who would skip out on me if I fell off as a man.

Those things you listed are apart of feeling good about a woman for me. Knowing that she is a solid individual.

You're also listening things you want in a man that I want in a woman. I want a woman who will help me out too and who will defend my name.

My problem is with a woman falling in love with me because I did well for myself and her only seeing me as a provider.
She gotta fukk with the man I am.

Thanks @BlackPearl The Empress for quoting this post bc I must have missed it. I don't think there's anything wrong with your expectations. The problem is, I think, that you and other men don't understand the nature of the exchange and so you start feeling.. objectified. Don't. Same way I tell women not to feel objectified bc someone notices their ass. That's great, now where do we start the bidding? And that goes both ways. Both parties should have an idea of what they're looking for in the dating marketplace and actively seek an appropriate match.

The money matters but not in the way you think. I didn't post that Jason Black vid to be shady, he explained it well. It's not so much about the money itself, it's about what it signals to a woman. It signals that you can turn your dreams into reality. That all that talk nikkas do to get draws will amount to something. I only did well in the dating game bc I'm sometimes amazingly good at discerning sincerity.

It's weird bc I agree with all your clarifications, I just don't agree with your conclusion.

 

[Antwon Mitchell]

@HarlemHottie


you're not feeding me plates of ducktails are you...just curious .

 

[HarlemHottie]

Well, our "enlightened" civilization will have to find another way to advance outside of the "outdated" gender roles.

That's still a work in progress. It took thousands of years to get patriarchy worked out.

 

[HarlemHottie]

@HarlemHottie


you're not feeding me plates of ducktails are you...just curious .

Not at all. And it's even crazier than what I described. I can't tell my whole life.

 

[Antwon Mitchell]

Not at all. And it's even crazier than what I described. I can't tell my whole life.

I gotcha... but how old are y'all and how long have y'all been married...outta curiosity & that'll be my last questions.

 

[HarlemHottie]

I gotcha... but how old are y'all and how long have y'all been married...outta curiosity & that'll be my last questions.

We're both 38, met at 19.

 

[Maximus]

That's still a work in progress. It took thousands of years to get patriarchy worked out.

We're supposedly "more enlightened" than the previous generations were(that's what feminists, simps and the media spent the last twenty-plus years telling me), so it shouldn't take that long to get this new "enlightened" form of thinking worked out and implemented on a global scale.

 

[Antwon Mitchell]

.

 

[HarlemHottie]

We're supposedly "more enlightened" than the previous generations were(that's what feminists, simps and the media spent the last twenty-plus years telling me), so it shouldn't take that long to get this new "enlightened" form of thinking worked out and implemented on a global scale.

The enlightenment will last as long as the US dollar. When one falls, so does the other. This has happened several times in history: women make economic gains which are then rolled back when the Empire falls.

 

[HarlemHottie]

y'all older than us, I'm 32 and my wife is 31 & we got married when we were 26 / 25 respectively.

We're the oldest millenials, born 1981. My niece is part of the youngest (1994). I like to think I have our generation somewhat figured out. I remember when there were articles about how we committed younger and more steadfastly than prior gens, partially in response to the messiness of our parents.

 

[Maximus]

The enlightenment will last as long as the US dollar. When one falls, so does the other. This has happened several times in history: women make economic gains which are then rolled back when the Empire falls.

Yes, I know. But I'm sure this time will be different, we're more "enlightened" after all.

 

[HarlemHottie]

Yes, I know. But I'm sure this time will be different, we're more "enlightened" after all.

 

[Benefited]

That's not the problem. The issue is that you are saying "what is the worth of being a provider?" If you can't be a provider, how can you expect to get the quality of women that you want? You are expecting women to ignore financial issues and to just be committed to you out of love. Sorry, love doesn't pay the bills. Money keeps food on the table, sends children to good schools and keeps them out of trouble via not associating with bad people and keeps your wife in line. Of course, ignore feminists, they are crazy I agree. But you cannot ignore why everyone who has the same mentality as you that women should expect to marry someone with low earnings will somehow work out. That is called struggle love. And women are waking up to it and you have to realize it. I focus on this because as a black centric board, I'm using the assumption that like me, you are black and want to marry black. This is important for all of us to recognize.

Why as a collective we don't get anywhere financially, why black women who grow up in poverty or middle class who are (according to data) fall back or even worse into poverty? Because they fell for what you are trying to sell them. Why can't black women just marry quality black men? There isn't enough to go around.

I 100% reject that so called "study" and statistics.just somebody else trying to create a narrative. There are way too many other factors to consider to soley put that on black men. The fact that our women and men have been europeanized,black people get money and fall back into poverty trying to keep up with the Wichowski's,and Libowitzes. Black women have been brainwashed by the european to believe they need a man who makes more or as much money. Versus a loyal man with stable money who would help her immensly financially if she coupled up with him. But even in that scenario if the woman is europeanized or misguided and trying to keep up with the Jones's,theres no way she would listen to her husband making less tell her thats not a wise decision. As well as you are more likely to have a black man not be as financially literate and agree to go along with it because he wants to keep up with the Jones's too? Or just because he has been feminized,raised by women and europeans and goes along with it based on "happy wife happy life". Black men don't have the means to just go along with black womens bad financial decisions and survive. You also have black people who had children out of wedlock joining forces,which means more living space will be needed,which means a bigger place. Now that will cost more,but meanwhile the mans check is being garnished for his out of wedlock child/children. Black women don't have this problem of garnishment in most cases. But I guess this study will pretend it doesn't threaten black women with poverty,by snatching away government assistance if they stay with the father of their child. You've basically rewarded ,or at least made it easy for black women to be in disfunctional,on again off again,easy to quit relationships with the father of their child. The government has done nothing to force women to improve on their choices. The most important thing when you are trying to come out of poverty is CONSISTENCY. Yet the government is making it easy for our black women to move around.

These stats don't talk about all the black people who are in poverty due to that,or the rest of these things. People falling back into poverty is glaring when your not showing the full details of why more black people aren't coming out of poverty in the first place. Lets talk about whos fault that is as well,I'm all for blaming the black man too,but comeon:respect:

 

[Benefited]

@Benefited come speak your piece



You're a weirdo but you usually do have valid insi

I already gave my insight a page or two ago.

Valid insight is what old senile people can give you from a porch or in an alley. I'm giving you gems,I'm giving you the game:respect:

 

[Spiritual Stratocaster]

I look at providing as more than just money.

Do you offer guidance.

I don't take pride in that shyt lmao
I'm not some bodyguard.

I'll treat ya daughter well fam lmaoq

You expect a broad to let you into her body but don't wanna offer guidance,protection,ability to provide