a woman who is attracted to another woman, whether she dresses up like a man, woman or a gorilla is still a lesbian.
and yes all men who engage in sex with other men arent homosexual. for instance male rape. its not about love, or feelings, is about power. theres no attraction (in some cases). brutal rape is often about degradation, humiliation, or power. its not about oh hes cute or im curious.
if you find another person of the same sex attractive whether they dress like the same sex or opposite sex or wear a gorilla suit or whatever yea your likely homosexual, but in the instance of rape thats a whole nother thing.
using the logic that any person who engages in the act of sex with a person of the same sex is homosexual then by default. how can people who are raped are by default, under no choice of their own be homosexual. even if under duress like someone puts a gun to your head and says suck this dikk or give up that ass, if you do it so you dont have your head blown off or to stop getting burned with a blow torch or cut with a chainsaw then your a homosexual, it doesnt work that way.
also you cant make a blanket statement and say "a lot" of people who are in homosexual relationships arent gay. If you can say that you can say, "alot" of people in heterosexual relationships arent straight. or a lot of men who date white women cant find happiness with a black woman and settle or really want white woman but cant get the ones they want and settle with black. ie a black man dating a 'ghetto' white girl, or dating a black woman who 'acts' white.
while there are people who are within that generalization, to make a blanket statement like that you can look at anyone in any type of relationship and make blanket generalizations that hold no truths unless they confess without which your just talking trash.