Bird babble stories:
“So…i get to the store…park my car…did a pretty good parking job, but there was someone behind my car, so I was like, what is this individual doing behind my car

…so i wait until theyre done, i get a text from my boss, who is only a few months from retirement, and its like, would you retire already? He’s been there for like ten years, wtf….I respond to him about the project im working on, which, i dont even know why we’re doing it

…its ridiculous and honestly a waste of everyone’s time. I have no idea how we’re gonna get it done either….finally the individual moves after tying their shoe or something, i dont even know what that was about. Get out the car, put my purse on the top of the car, reach back in to get my lotion from the center console, which reminds me…gotta get some more shea butter

…get my keys out my purse, i think i lock my door, and start walking to the store…but halfway to the door i’m like “did i lock my door?

?” So, i turn around lock the door, and have to wait for SO many cars to pass…eventually they-“
“Did you get the eggs though?

”
“I’M GETTING TO THAT

you never listen

”