why not just date a woman on “your level”?
In what way? Intelligence? Finances? Pedigree? I ask bc this is where i think modern ppl, esp women, get some things wrong. You can be equals in some ways, but not others.
My man and i are equals in intelligence (tho he'd argue opposite bc I'm more of a generalist while he drills down on a few subjects), but he's better than me in some ways too. I legit look up to him in many ways, ie, he's
morally better than me.
This maintains a good tone in the relationship, one of mutual respect and admiration.
Over the span of 20 yrs, we've gone through a few different relationship configurations. The results echo theories of evolutionary biology. When he put me on a pedestal, the end result was a lack of attraction (on MY part). Hewasnt acting like his normal self, i became increasingly bytchy and shrewish, it was a vicious cycle. We saw what was happening and tried the other way, me admiring him, and things normalized. In fact, they improved. I was even more attracted, he liked that feeling and decided to chase it with continual self improvement- a
virtuous cycle where we're both striving to be good enough for the other.
Part of our purpose as humans is to use this dynamic towards a goal of continual mutual betterment. That's how you as a couple go on to raise good kids, help your community, etc. You push each other to become better, regardless of who started out 'better'.