Men with kids: Your Cup of Tea or Nah?

[BmoreGorilla]

Irl if I kept running into women who think like the ones in this thread Id be lonely as fukk

 

[CinnaSlim]

@CinnaSlim is my "play sister"

We family. Family ain't always blood related.

 

[MysticMonroe]

Talk about generalizing and sterotyping

Yall ain't no better than dudes.

Say what you want. You may not be like that but I know people who are. Too many people are having kids with little or no stability in their life, financial, emotional,mental and no real relationship with the baby mama/daddy. And I've seen the 'deadbeat' baby mama/daddy who haven't seen their kid in month, hop up and wanna claim the kid around tax time or when the other parent gets into a new relationship or to flex on social media. People with kids act like they don't have kids. There a crappy parents that I've known for years that you would be shocked they have kids because they still act like their single and childless.

A kid will have an impact on every relationship you have especially if not with the the person you had the kid with. Theres no reason for anyone to be having a kid now, if you have a kid you wanted it, because their multiple type of birth control. Your time and money is limited having a kid. You can't pack up and go to the beach without thinking about the kid. You can't move too far away from the kid. If you marry a person with kids I always think we couldn't move to California or Washington D.C. if we live in South Carolina because then he couldn't see the kid often, but their are more job opportunities in these states for the career I'm in school for.

 

[Rekkapryde]

Say what you want. You may not be like that but I know people who are. Too many people are having kids with little or no stability in their life, financial, emotional,mental and no real relationship with the baby mama/daddy. And I've seen the 'deadbeat' baby mama/daddy who haven't seen their kid in month, hop up and wanna claim the kid around tax time or when the other parent gets into a new relationship or to flex on social media. People with kids act like they don't have kids. There a crappy parents that I've known for years that you would be shocked they have kids because they still act like their single and childless.

A kid will have an impact on every relationship you have especially if not with the the person you had the kid with. Theres no reason for anyone to be having a kid now, if you have a kid you wanted it, because their multiple type of birth control. Your time and money is limited having a kid. You can't pack up and go to the beach without thinking about the kid. You can't move too far away from the kid. If you marry a person with kids I always think we couldn't move to California or Washington D.C. if we live in South Carolina because then he couldn't see the kid often, but their are more job opportunities in these states for the career I'm in school for.

100% true, but you have a brain. You're the exception.

 

[DarkHorse23]

I would definitely prefer not to. I just don't want the potential drama plus trying to be friends with the guys kid or trying to make them like me is just not something I want to do.

How could anyone not like you? You're so likeable

 

[Chelsea Bridge]

How could anyone not like you? You're so likeable

I am . Everyone loves me

 

[Phoenix_Knightly23]

As long as the kids aren't bad and the baby mother isn't a psycho...

 

[Sassy]

No. It was a couple weeks ago i met a guy while i was walking. We traded numbers and went from there. I considered giving him a chance until he told me he had 3 kids. I may be shallow but if the roles were reversed. Im sure they would feel the same way.


Not to mention. I consider certain factors such as how old you are, if you were divorced or widowed or out of wedlock. Etc.

Somewhat a change of opinion. So sorry if I'm all over the place with my explanations ( I have ADD)

if he was with his BM for..idk, 12 years of something and had kid(s) by only her. then I may consider dating him because it shows me he has loyalty in a way. at that point, i would kind of view it as a divorce if they're no longer together - If that makes sense. It also depends on how old are the kid(s). If they're over 13, then . But if they're like...idk, under the age of 5 then it's because at that time - i believe you should focus on the kids, but that's my opinion.

It also depends on what kind of person he is and if he was there for his kids (or still are). and what kind of person his BM is...also, if the kids are just chill or they'e little shyts.

Also how old is the dad..if he's in his 30's then because let's face it - most people have kids by the time they're in their 30's. if they're in their 20's tho...eh...probably not. Like I said before, I believe one should focus on their kid.

I have a change of opinion because of my stepdad's situation recently. he has other kids...but some of his BMs/ex wives did him dirty...like they wont allow him to see the kids..or some of them - if not the majority of them weren't even his to begin with - and it isn't just with my stepdad,. I have talked to a few guys that's in a similar situation. So it did teach me one thing - everyone's situation is different and I definitely shouldn't judge too harshly just because of the kids - they're not at fault here. sometimes its the BD, sometimes its the BM.

Now all that's been said, this doesn't mean I will date or consider dating a deadbeat or I think all single dads are deadbeats obviously.

TLDR: I have a change of opinion by listening to people and their situations and my opinion is more in depth. It also depends on situations and people. and it's complex as fukk tbh.

 

[Giselle]

When I get 30+, I don't think I'll have a problem with it. I like kids, but if you don't, the kids are with the mom most of the time so it shouldn't be a big issue. I would say they should be preteens and older so that there is none of that "come by and drop off some formula, pampers" stuff that's used to hide the fcking lots of times.

 

[kittenheels]

I've dated a guy with a kid. Very good dad, but the last time we had sex, his son's school called right before I could get off. Always interruptions, I'm selfish.That's when I knew, I can't. Sad because he was a freak.

 

[tater]

I wouldn't. Too much drama.