Single parenthood & the military

[Ezekiel 25:17]

If only I knew back then what I know now. I was in the US Navy and got out because I was too young and stupid to understand how to make it work for me and only focused on what I hated about it.

Here’s what I’d do differently now.

1. Do 20 years, get retirement and go in with NO medical issues on record, but figure out which “disability” I could develop while in that would allow me to stay in, but get extra pay after retirement.

2. Let the military pay for my bachelors and masters degrees.

3. Do research before joining and figure out which career path I want AFTER the military and choose my job before enlisting based on that career path. Don’t just sign up for anything. My ASVAB score was 87, so I had a good job, but I don’t currently do anything related to search and track radars.

4. But a house as early as possible and use it to trade up as I advance in life.

Example…



5. Stay away from the people not taking it seriously. You’re not there to do the same shyt you were doing before enlisting. Focus on improvement, not being the same.

These nikkas said $400,000 first home.

 

[Commish]

College, trade school, and military are the top options.

There's also truck driving or IT.

I know, man..

But, her problem is that her youngest don't wanna do any of that. He claim to wanna work full time, but no company is hiring full time on the area. Plus, his car is done! He doesn't have reliable transportation and don't wanna hop on the bus and handle his business. He got one part time gig that's 25 mins away and borrows his brother truck or Mom's car to get to work. His work cut his hours because he got sick and they didn't honor the doctor's note he submitted.
.
It's some stuff going on but I am sharing surface level stuff to add context to my query.

 

[Wig Twistin Season]

These nikkas said $400,000 first home.

Listen to the video. I’m not referring to the text. I couldn’t tell you anything about what they’re saying below the video.

 

[Ezekiel 25:17]

I know, man..

But, her problem is that her youngest don't wanna do any of that. He claim to wanna work full time, but no company is hiring full time on the area. Plus, his car is done! He doesn't have reliable transportation and don't wanna hop on the bus and handle his business. He got one part time gig that's 25 mins away and borrows his brother truck or Mom's car to get to work. His work cut his hours because he got sick and they didn't honor the doctor's note he submitted.
.
It's some stuff going on but I am sharing surface level stuff to add context to my query.

Sounds like he needs to get kicked out then. If he can't do the military it's over with.

I never understand people who have zero drive to do anything.

 

[Commish]

If only I knew back then what I know now. I was in the US Navy and got out because I was too young and stupid to understand how to make it work for me and only focused on what I hated about it.

Here’s what I’d do differently now.

1. Do 20 years, get retirement and go in with NO medical issues on record, but figure out which “disability” I could develop while in that would allow me to stay in, but get extra pay after retirement. You’ll be 40 making money with the freedom to start another career and really get paid 3xs a month.



2. Let the military pay for my bachelors and masters degrees.

3. Do research before joining and figure out which career path I want AFTER the military and choose my job before enlisting based on that career path. Don’t just sign up for anything. My ASVAB score was 87, so I had a good job, but I don’t currently do anything related to search and track radars.

4. But a house as early as possible and use it to trade up as I advance in life.

Example…



5. Stay away from the people not taking it seriously. You’re not there to do the same shyt you were doing before enlisting. Focus on improvement, not being the same.

Thank you for sharing this!!

I feel bad for my lady. But, she shares the blame in her own delimma. She gonna have a real life baby boy living with her unless she nip iish in the bud! Smh..

 

[Ezekiel 25:17]

I know, man..

But, her problem is that her youngest don't wanna do any of that. He claim to wanna work full time, but no company is hiring full time on the area. Plus, his car is done! He doesn't have reliable transportation and don't wanna hop on the bus and handle his business. He got one part time gig that's 25 mins away and borrows his brother truck or Mom's car to get to work. His work cut his hours because he got sick and they didn't honor the doctor's note he submitted.
.
It's some stuff going on but I am sharing surface level stuff to add context to my query.

Is that your son? I'm not a parent, but I'd give him a left hook upside his head.

 

[Commish]

Sounds like he needs to get kicked out then. If he can't do the military it's over with.

I never understand people who have zero drive to do anything.

I hear ya!

Let me be candid with you..

Stuff like this one of the reasons why I wasn't fond of dealing with women with kids...

Some have kids that hustle backwards but when you try to offer advice, then they be a all defensive thinking can't nobody tell them iish, then get overwhelmed when issh hit the fan!

She isn't gonna kick either of them out...

That's for certain...

She could help the young one get reliable transportation, but she don't wanna do it. He don't want help and is picky on where he wanna work which is wild to me considering that he has severe limited options...

He should join the military. job corps, get a trade or simply get on the bus or use someone's car to find a FULL TIME job every day!

Now, none of this is my business, but kind of is because now it is affecting our relationship and I really don't wanna deal with funny acting behavior. Smh..

 

[Commish]

Is that your son? I'm not a parent, but I'd give him a left hook upside his head.

Nah..

I have no kids. They are my lady's kids..

She is a widow...

What she does with her kids is her business, but she need help dealing with them...

I can't talk to them because I don't have rapport with them like that to do so, so I am sideline coaching her a lil bit..

Thing is..

Ppl wan a say mind ya business, but what if the business is brought to you indirectly?

 

[⠀X ⠀]

 

[Sonic Boom of the South]

So this is about a parent encouraging a child to go into the military?


What is the single parent part about?

 

[Jean Jacket]

1. Air Force or Navy.

2. Don't get any loans for anything more than 4 years. Get a used civic or corolla ( under 10k) or better yet...don't even get a car until you're able to move off base.

3. Don't get married.

4. Get your upgrade training done fast as you can so you can get your certs and degrees going asap.

5. Max your BRS contributions.

6. Buy a small house or condo as soon as you're able to. The newer the better.

7. Have a solid family care plan for if/when you deploy.

8. Go hard at PT and do as much crossfit and contact sports/ martial arts to stay in shape. Document every ache, pain, sprain in your medical records.

9. Learn how to cook and don't get in the habit of buying liquor and fast food. That shyt wrecks your budget.

10. Get a part time hustle or side business while you're in.

 

[Marc Spector]

I appreciate your perspective..

I will share this...

My lady is in a pickle with her grown sons who live with her. Yesterday, while we were talking on the phone, her sons got a lil out of pocket with her because they are having some issues with each other. The older one feel that the younger one isn't pulling his weight as far as contributing to the household expenses as well as feel that my lady is coddling the younger grown son. The younger grown son feel the the older son is trying to G check him and my lady isn't trying hard enough to resolve it..

Now, both of them have valid points, but both of them are out of pocket for the way that they talk to their mother...

I think they the younger grown son should consider joining the military because he don't wanna go to school nor go to trade school. He also doesn't have reliable transportation and isn't making much money.

If he doesn't get his iish together then he is gonna have a rough life. Unskilled labor with a HS education and little work experience isn't gonna cut it!

I told my lady that she can't have disharmony in her household and that she should never put up with disrespect being the sole breadwinner, but like many single parents, they wanna handle it on their own. Only problem is that she is overwhelmed and struggling handling the conflict in HER house...

Now, she acting funny style with me a lil, but I think it is self induced because she refuses to put her foot down..

I figured I would share this with ya to give some context to my query...

I mean military would be a good look for a jit like that. Thing is, hes gotta want to join. One of the worst things you could do for him is "force him" to join and he lacks so much motivation that he wont even make it through basic training, much less make it TO basic training.

But if hes a mildly intelligent young man, responds well to challenges, is capable of exercising self control and inner discipline, and is highly motivated by income potential, then educate him on joining.

I tell anyone this: I was moving boxes at a warehouse for $18 an hour to making 90k the next year all because i played my cards right and set myself up for success through the military. If you know the play you can parlay some good money through the military.

 

[Commish]

I mean military would be a good look for a jit like that. Thing is, hes gotta want to join. One of the worst things you could do for him is "force him" to join and he lacks so much motivation that he wont even make it through basic training, much less make it TO basic training.

But if hes a mildly intelligent young man, responds well to challenges, is capable of exercising self control and inner discipline, and is highly motivated by income potential, then educate him on joining.

I tell anyone this: I was moving boxes at a warehouse for $18 an hour to making 90k the next year all because i played my cards right and set myself up for success through the military. If you know the play you can parlay some good money through the military.

I agree with you!

I can't make the young man do anything! He has to wanna do it like you said...

But, I shared context with you because @ the end of the day, all of this is affecting my relationship with their mother...

Look @ it this way...

Let's say that the mother doesn't wanna get me involved with her family affairs.. OK, fair enough...

But..

What if I am talking to the mother about our affairs and the children interrupts our conversation with their family affairs?

Then what?

So, when I hear a grown child scold their mother on the jack while I am talking to her and she focuses on the family affair while on the phone with me, what am I supposed to do??

Now, the mother is sad and acting weird because of her family affair but doesn't wanna discuss why she is sad, then what am I supposed to do?

Me?

I feel that she need to handle her affair, then when she is ready to deal with me, then do so..

I don't want to be around her and she is acting funny. I think it is better if she take care of home, then when that is handled, then get with me...

Thay way, I am not in it and we can continue to do what we do..

Lastly, back to what you are saying..

If I was in my early 20s and struggling to make $$ w/o transportation, then I would consider going into the service provided that I can pass the physical...

Either that or go to a community college, learn a trade or apply for some city or government jobs. Point is do something because today's job market is brutal! Jobs are being lost and a lot of ppl have to compete with what little opportunities that's out there...

 

[Commish]

So this is about a parent encouraging a child to go into the military?


What is the single parent part about?

It is about the single parent presenting an option to join the military if the child doesn't wanna attend college, trade school or actively get a full time job to help out...

Basically, the single parent needs guidance on preventing a child from becoming a baby boy...