AlbertPullhoez
The Takeover
Bill Cartwright wasnt having that shyt though
Old head made MJ fall back
Old head made MJ fall back
The official Michael Jordan is an a$$hole compilation thread
- Thread starter B.drizzle
- Start date
I just wanna take a moment to point out some amazing displays of a$$hole-ness that I think are being over looked
Betting on cockroaches Take this for what it's worth but I played golf with a member of the Birmingham Barons and he told me this story about Jordan.
There was a rain delay during one of their games and the players were all hanging out in the dugout waiting for the storm to pass. A few of the players noticed some cockroaches crawling around the dugout and watched them race around the players feet. Jordan sees the commotion and comes over to inspect what's going on. Being the degenerate gambler that he is, he wants to have a legitimate race with these little bugs. He tells the team he's gonna bet $500 on one of the cockroaches. Now remember, these guys are not well paid athletes, but they were able to scrounge up the money between the entire team. They pooled all the money together and got the cockroaches into place and ready to start. They lifted the barricade to let them loose and as soon as they do Jordan squashes the teams cockroach, picks up their $500 and walks away.
Trust me or don't, I don't really care - but this story is too Jordan to be fake.
Spits on cinnamon rolls so his guards won't touch them Back when they used to shoot a lot of commercials, Jordan's security team would wait for him in his trailer while he was on set. A woman named Linda cooked Michael's meals, and he loved cinnamon rolls. She'd bake a tray and bring it to him. When it came time to film, he'd see the guards eyeing the cinnamon rolls and he'd walk over and spit on each one, to make sure nobody took his food.
Airport "Gambling"
1.Jordan used to bet with his teammates that his bags would get taken off of the plane first, then pay airport workers to do it.
2.Jordan used to bet with his teammates about everything, and one time he bet on whose luggage would come out first at the airport. What his teammates didn't know is that he had pre-arranged for his luggage to come out first with the employees at the airport, who of course were happy to do something for Michael Jordan. I hope he tipped the airport employees afterwards, but that wasn't part of the story.
Which side do you want on the poster
JORDAN: Which Side? STACKHOUSE: Whatever man, just play ball man JORDAN: I'm not saying what side do you want me to go by you, thats gonna happen regardless, I'm going to put you on my poster today so I am asking you what side you like of yourself and I'll make sure that when I dunk on you I know what side you want showing.
insulting Rodney out the league
"[ Jordan] is in Rodney's face, screaming, 'You're a loser! You've always been a loser!' Rodney can hardly put up a jumper now.’
McCray ended up winning a title that year, but only averaged 15.9 minutes per game. It was also the last season he ever played.
all this along with the fear he put into Clyde Drexler to wear clyde wore two left shoes so he wouldn't have to be confronted by mj, Kwame first thoughts being mj will kill him for getting a speeding ticket, and telling the president to not play gold like a girl this guy is a legit psycho the fact that nike and the nba were able to sell this gambling dikkhead off as a wholesome family man was absolutely amazing he might legit need medication
Betting on cockroaches Take this for what it's worth but I played golf with a member of the Birmingham Barons and he told me this story about Jordan.
There was a rain delay during one of their games and the players were all hanging out in the dugout waiting for the storm to pass. A few of the players noticed some cockroaches crawling around the dugout and watched them race around the players feet. Jordan sees the commotion and comes over to inspect what's going on. Being the degenerate gambler that he is, he wants to have a legitimate race with these little bugs. He tells the team he's gonna bet $500 on one of the cockroaches. Now remember, these guys are not well paid athletes, but they were able to scrounge up the money between the entire team. They pooled all the money together and got the cockroaches into place and ready to start. They lifted the barricade to let them loose and as soon as they do Jordan squashes the teams cockroach, picks up their $500 and walks away.
Trust me or don't, I don't really care - but this story is too Jordan to be fake.
Spits on cinnamon rolls so his guards won't touch them Back when they used to shoot a lot of commercials, Jordan's security team would wait for him in his trailer while he was on set. A woman named Linda cooked Michael's meals, and he loved cinnamon rolls. She'd bake a tray and bring it to him. When it came time to film, he'd see the guards eyeing the cinnamon rolls and he'd walk over and spit on each one, to make sure nobody took his food.
Airport "Gambling"
1.Jordan used to bet with his teammates that his bags would get taken off of the plane first, then pay airport workers to do it.
2.Jordan used to bet with his teammates about everything, and one time he bet on whose luggage would come out first at the airport. What his teammates didn't know is that he had pre-arranged for his luggage to come out first with the employees at the airport, who of course were happy to do something for Michael Jordan. I hope he tipped the airport employees afterwards, but that wasn't part of the story.
Which side do you want on the poster
JORDAN: Which Side? STACKHOUSE: Whatever man, just play ball man JORDAN: I'm not saying what side do you want me to go by you, thats gonna happen regardless, I'm going to put you on my poster today so I am asking you what side you like of yourself and I'll make sure that when I dunk on you I know what side you want showing.
insulting Rodney out the league
"[ Jordan] is in Rodney's face, screaming, 'You're a loser! You've always been a loser!' Rodney can hardly put up a jumper now.’
McCray ended up winning a title that year, but only averaged 15.9 minutes per game. It was also the last season he ever played.
all this along with the fear he put into Clyde Drexler to wear clyde wore two left shoes so he wouldn't have to be confronted by mj, Kwame first thoughts being mj will kill him for getting a speeding ticket, and telling the president to not play gold like a girl this guy is a legit psycho the fact that nike and the nba were able to sell this gambling dikkhead off as a wholesome family man was absolutely amazing he might legit need medication
dora_da_destroyer
Master Baker
It really is crazy how huge MJ was and the image that surrounded him..,great basketball player, role model, the celeb any kid wanted to run up to and say "aww, gosh, do you think you can sign this for me Michael?" Little did my young self know that he'd be the exact type of man I hate 
ALonelyDad
Veteran
The fact that he declined Chammilinaire but took a selfie with macklemore 
No Apologies
He was like that Japanese World War II soldier they found hiding in a cave in Guam 27 years after the Japanese surrendered. The only difference is, Jordan won! What good is victory if you never realize the battle is over?
This is how Jordan really is, I just never thought he'd let the world see it. His old Bulls' assistant coach, Johnny Bach, told me early on, "This guy is a killer. He's a cold-blooded assassin. It's not enough for him to beat you. He wants you dead."
I covered his entire career and saw examples of it throughout. Saw him break Rodney McCray in after-practice, $100 shooting games, humiliate him until McCray lost his stroke. Watched him race his car up the shoulder of Chicago interstates just because he didn't have the patience to wait in traffic. Heard how he'd kept his friends confined to his hotel room at the Barcelona Olympics so he could play cards -- and keep playing until he won. For Jordan, it was never enough to win. He had to have scalps.
Before his second comeback -- with the Washington Wizards -- I was the first out with the story by a month. Jordan and his agent, David Falk, denied it, said I was crazy, practically said I was smoking something. Then, after a month of lies, Jordan admitted it was all true. I saw him in the locker room before his first game back and said, "You wanna say something to me, maybe?"
And he said, "You know you don't get no apologies in this business."
Mj big faces/mushes the face of 5ft asian girl to the floor for getting to close (story taken from reddit)
TL, DR: my MJ story. Throwaway, I'm a lurker.
If you live in Chicago, there are a handful of casinos you can go to, but arguably the nicest one is the Horseshoe in Hammond, IN. You can go there almost any day of the week and play almost any game, and at some point in the night, someone will bring the conversation around to MJ. If you happen to play poker or craps, you'll usually cut down on the degrees of separation and hear from someone who actually saw (or claims to have seen, FWIW) MJ play because they're apparently his favorite games. There are lots of stories I've heard, but here's mine:
This happened mid 2000s. I didn't grow up in Chicago, never was a Bulls fan, didn't go through the hero-worship, but I understood it. The guy was a legend, I can respect that. My friends who grew up in Chicago did their best to indoctrinate me. One friend in particular, a tiny, feisty, full-hearted, asthmatic but incredibly athletically achieved Japanese girl (Izzy, you're the best) who grew up in the suburbs led the charge. She, as a graduate student, had an MJ poster on her wall, and another on the ceiling over her bed. She could make you live his last championship three pointer with the way she got excited about telling you where she was and how she felt when she saw it. She also carried around his baseball card in the hopes of one day getting him to sign it.
One night, a group of us are at the Horseshoe celebrating the end of a semester. Izzy doesn't gamble, but she knows MJ plays there sometimes, and has come along just on the chance that he'll be there. This was, I believe, the third time she has come along with us just for that reason.
We're playing craps, and having a blast. We're excited and young and getting drunk, it's a good night. Our group is at one end of the craps table, when we see the players at the other end standing taller to look over us at something. We turn around, and there he is, at the center and towards the front of this decent sized group of people. People to either side are hushing up and craning their necks, but he's just walking, staring straight ahead, not even talking to his group.
Some people have it in them to try to walk up to him, I wouldn't have. His demeanor is saying nothing but, "Don't bother me." But some people do, and he does stop for a few of them. Looking back, they were both blondes with tight clothes, but that didn't click with me. It didn't click with Izzy either, she starts to panic a little bit and her face turns red. She takes a few quick breaths before she says, to herself mostly, "This is it. This is it. Oh my god."
Before I even realize she's gone, she's halfway to him and he's done signing the blondes' chests or whatever. He starts walking again by the time she gets to him, and I remember what happened next like I was watching a slow-mo replay.
He's walking toward us, Izzy's back is to us, and she's only a few feet away from him. I can tell she has both her hands forward with the card, obviously looking for an autograph. She told us later that at that moment she had just opened her mouth to introduce herself. Without looking down (she's barely 5 feet tall), without breaking stride, he puts his hand up, grabs her face like he's palming a basketball, and twists/pushes her head out of his way. Her head is almost twisted completely around and facing us, eyes closed and mouth scrunched against his hand, before she's off to his side and he's moving on. It was like he was pushing open a door. She stumbles a few steps and falls over, and one of his entourage almost trips over her before helping her up and apologizing for him.
By this time, MJ is right next to us at the craps table, still looking straight ahead, but he has this smirk on his face I will never forget.
I was pissed. He didn't have to sign shyt, he didn't even have to stop and say hi. But basic human decency stops way before grabbing someone's face and shoving them out of your way.
Izzy was shocked, and quiet for the rest of the night. At times, she was near tears, but never let us see them. Now, she was the first to say that he didn't owe her anything and is free to do what he wants. I noticed the next time I'm at her place, though, that the posters aren't there anymore. And as far as I know, she never told her story about his championship three pointer again.
Dude got his dad killed what do you expect
Still the goat though
Mj in this social media era would be
Still the goat though
Mj in this social media era would be
Republicans buy shoes to
Part of Jordan’s lasting appeal rests on his ability to skirt anything controversial which is something LeBron has not mastered. “Jordan stayed above the fray,” says Stephen Master, who heads Nielsen’s sports practice. “Republicans buy shoes, too,” Jordan reportedly quipped to a friend on why he wouldn’t endorse a black Democratic candidate, Harvey Gantt, in a 1990 North Carolina Senate race against Republican Jesse Helms.
Get shoes or die trying
Several black activists have accused Michael Jordan of not doing enough for the black community complaining that even his shoes are too expensive for most black youths, a charge Jordan has answered himself by saying, “I make shoes for white suburban kids, not the poor black kids. That would be like opening a restaurant for people without stomachs.”
Jordan did state that he and his friend Larry Bird had originally designed a shoe made for blacks called Air Birds which featured a silhouette of the Great White Hope displaying strong fundamentals. However, the shoes proved to be disastrously unpopular with black youths as many complained about the shoes smelling “like dookie,” most likely due to the fact that the shoes were largely composed of discarded potato skins and horse dung.
“It was a cost preventive measure on part of the company. How were we to know that black kids wouldn’t want to wear shoes with an emblem of a tall white man throwing an effective dribble pass which may or may not have smelled like compost? It smelled like a farm because it was the Air Bird. The man grew up on a farm or something like that,” said Jordan.
Part of Jordan’s lasting appeal rests on his ability to skirt anything controversial which is something LeBron has not mastered. “Jordan stayed above the fray,” says Stephen Master, who heads Nielsen’s sports practice. “Republicans buy shoes, too,” Jordan reportedly quipped to a friend on why he wouldn’t endorse a black Democratic candidate, Harvey Gantt, in a 1990 North Carolina Senate race against Republican Jesse Helms.
Get shoes or die trying
Several black activists have accused Michael Jordan of not doing enough for the black community complaining that even his shoes are too expensive for most black youths, a charge Jordan has answered himself by saying, “I make shoes for white suburban kids, not the poor black kids. That would be like opening a restaurant for people without stomachs.”
Jordan did state that he and his friend Larry Bird had originally designed a shoe made for blacks called Air Birds which featured a silhouette of the Great White Hope displaying strong fundamentals. However, the shoes proved to be disastrously unpopular with black youths as many complained about the shoes smelling “like dookie,” most likely due to the fact that the shoes were largely composed of discarded potato skins and horse dung.
“It was a cost preventive measure on part of the company. How were we to know that black kids wouldn’t want to wear shoes with an emblem of a tall white man throwing an effective dribble pass which may or may not have smelled like compost? It smelled like a farm because it was the Air Bird. The man grew up on a farm or something like that,” said Jordan.
Last edited:
DeVanteSwing
Flop Champion
Yesss, i've been looking for that MJ asian girl story for a while lol
hit her with the
what a GOAT
hit her with the
what a GOAT
They just keep coming Wow!
"You ever hear of a guy, six-eleven maybe and two hundred sixty pounds, a guy big and fat like that and he can't get but two rebounds, if that many, running all over the damn court and he gets two rebounds? Big guy like that and he gets one rebound. Can't even stick his **** into people and get more than that...Big, fat, fat guy. One rebound in three games. Power forward. Maybe they should call it powerless forward." - Michael ripping Stacey King a new one
"I hope there's a jumpshot in there." - Michael to Stacey King who was walking into the locker room with a box
"They don't need a ticket to watch you sitting on the bench. They can go to your house for that." - Michael to Charles Davis who was sorting through his tickets for his family and friends
"You're an idiot. You've screwed up every play we ever ran. You're too stupid to even remember the plays. We ought to get rid of you." - Michael to Horace Grant
"If you [pass the ball to Bill Cartwright], you'll never get the ball from me."
"Headache tonight, Scottie?" - Michael asks Scottie, while showing him his 2-for-16 line
"Will Vanderbilt. He doesn't deserve to be named after a Big Ten school." - Michael on Will Perdue
"Don't give him any money. If he can ask for change, then he should be able to say "Would you like fries with that?"" - Michael stopping Charles Barkley from giving a homeless man some money
"Jordan's are for players who start. You need bench warmer sneakers." - Michael to a teammate who asked if he could wear Jordan sneakers during a game
Quotes from the Jordan rules book
"I hate being out there with those garbagemen. They don't get you the ball."
"They've got no idea what it's all about. The white guys, they work hard, but they don't have the talent. And the rest of them? Who knows what to expect? They're not good for much of anything."
He can't do anything with the ball. Don't give it to him." - Michael yelling at Paxson who passed the ball to Perdue
"I know I can recognize what to do, but I'm not sure they can."
"We're not winning because of talent. We're just beating bad teams."
"It's a hell of a lot easier to make Earl Monroe look good than it is Brad Sellers."
I'm sure everything will be fine if we win, but if we start losing, I'm shooting."
"I know what I would do if I were coach. I'd determine our strengths and weaknesses and utilize them. And it's pretty clear what our strength is."
"Your boy doesn't want to play. I'm tired of bailing his ass out." - Michael yelling at Jim Cleamons about Dennis Hopson
"He's causing me too many turnovers." - Michael on Cartwright's inability to catch
"Why the hell don't you ever set a pick like that in a game?" - Michael yelling at Perdue after also hitting Perdue upside his head (led to the institution of the private curtain for practices)
"You ever hear of a guy, six-eleven maybe and two hundred sixty pounds, a guy big and fat like that and he can't get but two rebounds, if that many, running all over the damn court and he gets two rebounds? Big guy like that and he gets one rebound. Can't even stick his **** into people and get more than that...Big, fat, fat guy. One rebound in three games. Power forward. Maybe they should call it powerless forward." - Michael ripping Stacey King a new one
"I hope there's a jumpshot in there." - Michael to Stacey King who was walking into the locker room with a box
"They don't need a ticket to watch you sitting on the bench. They can go to your house for that." - Michael to Charles Davis who was sorting through his tickets for his family and friends
"You're an idiot. You've screwed up every play we ever ran. You're too stupid to even remember the plays. We ought to get rid of you." - Michael to Horace Grant
"If you [pass the ball to Bill Cartwright], you'll never get the ball from me."
"Headache tonight, Scottie?" - Michael asks Scottie, while showing him his 2-for-16 line
"Will Vanderbilt. He doesn't deserve to be named after a Big Ten school." - Michael on Will Perdue
"Don't give him any money. If he can ask for change, then he should be able to say "Would you like fries with that?"" - Michael stopping Charles Barkley from giving a homeless man some money
"Jordan's are for players who start. You need bench warmer sneakers." - Michael to a teammate who asked if he could wear Jordan sneakers during a game
Quotes from the Jordan rules book
"I hate being out there with those garbagemen. They don't get you the ball."
"They've got no idea what it's all about. The white guys, they work hard, but they don't have the talent. And the rest of them? Who knows what to expect? They're not good for much of anything."
He can't do anything with the ball. Don't give it to him." - Michael yelling at Paxson who passed the ball to Perdue
"I know I can recognize what to do, but I'm not sure they can."
"We're not winning because of talent. We're just beating bad teams."
"It's a hell of a lot easier to make Earl Monroe look good than it is Brad Sellers."
I'm sure everything will be fine if we win, but if we start losing, I'm shooting."
"I know what I would do if I were coach. I'd determine our strengths and weaknesses and utilize them. And it's pretty clear what our strength is."
"Your boy doesn't want to play. I'm tired of bailing his ass out." - Michael yelling at Jim Cleamons about Dennis Hopson
"He's causing me too many turnovers." - Michael on Cartwright's inability to catch
"Why the hell don't you ever set a pick like that in a game?" - Michael yelling at Perdue after also hitting Perdue upside his head (led to the institution of the private curtain for practices)
Last edited:
Jackson wanted Jordan to "talk to Kobe a little bit" after a game.
"First thing Kobe says is, 'I could kick your a** one-on-one,'" said Jackson, describing the meeting between the two.
^someone needs to find out more about this meeting. there's no way jordan let that shyt go considering every other fukk storykobe basically did a pre-emptive strike to Jordan anticipating that Jordan would say it to him if he didn't.
"First thing Kobe says is, 'I could kick your a** one-on-one,'" said Jackson, describing the meeting between the two.
^someone needs to find out more about this meeting. there's no way jordan let that shyt go considering every other fukk storykobe basically did a pre-emptive strike to Jordan anticipating that Jordan would say it to him if he didn't.