40 Dating a 21 Year Old

[Astroslik]

I was book smart but very naive and dumb when it came to men. I didn't know what red flags to look out for. First one wouldn't leave me alone and pretended to be a college student. He pretended to be into the things that I was into and once we were official he came clean and started to show who he really was. He lied about everything except his favorite color. He turned out to be a controlling, creepy ass, weirdo. He always referred to me as a girl, never a woman. I started noticing weird shyt he would do and it made me feel like I was in a father/daughter or predator type relationship. On top of everything else, it just didn't feel right. Felt gross.

I’m interested on what his side is. You females love to embellish shyt

 

[xCivicx]

What's the oldest you'll date?

Stop asking females questions that you know you wont get an honest answer to

The females talking tough in here are the same ones drooling over Idris Elba

 

[xCivicx]

A lot of y’all men are unnecessarily rude. Taking ish to an entirely different level. You’re not stupid so you know what I meant. Or are you

?

Where did i insult you in my post??

Why are you insulting me??

 

[Chrishaune]

I was book smart but very naive and dumb when it came to men. I didn't know what red flags to look out for. First one wouldn't leave me alone and pretended to be a college student. He pretended to be into the things that I was into and once we were official he came clean and started to show who he really was. He lied about everything except his favorite color. He turned out to be a controlling, creepy ass, weirdo. He always referred to me as a girl, never a woman. I started noticing weird shyt he would do and it made me feel like I was in a father/daughter or predator type relationship. On top of everything else, it just didn't feel right. Felt gross.

At least you admit it. But I'll say this, everybody has to take full responsibility for how they have lived. If you don't want any problems down the line, you have to look at everything you've done wrong from your own decisions. That way you'll be less likely to mess up your future relationships. Everybody makes mistakes. Those dudes don't sound like good guys to begin with. An older man would have been able to talk to them, look at them and tell you what they were about.

 

[truth2you]

I was book smart but very naive and dumb when it came to men. I didn't know what red flags to look out for. First one wouldn't leave me alone and pretended to be a college student. He pretended to be into the things that I was into and once we were official he came clean and started to show who he really was. He lied about everything except his favorite color. He turned out to be a controlling, creepy ass, weirdo. He always referred to me as a girl, never a woman. I started noticing weird shyt he would do and it made me feel like I was in a father/daughter or predator type relationship. On top of everything else, it just didn't feel right. Felt gross.

Yeah, that's foul. The first sign something was wrong was him wanting be up under you all the time. If you have a life that doesn't happen.

If he was saying he was in college, you didn't wonder how can he be in school, and getting shyt done if he was up under you all the time?

 

[Counter Racist Male]

Stop asking females questions that you know you wont get an honest answer to

The females talking tough in here are the same ones drooling over Idris Elba

I know man. I don't think I'd a 21 year old anyways.

 

[semicko82]

Stop asking females questions that you know you wont get an honest answer to

The females talking tough in here are the same ones drooling over Idris Elba

I overhear some of these 20 year old chicks go bonkers over the actor who plays Ghost on Power, and he's well in his 40s.

 

[Edub]

I don’t see the issue most 40 something single women want to run around acting like they 20 something might as well get the real thing

This.....


Black folks really do age slow....so yea it’s really just a large varying dating pool, cuz many older women still 20 something mentally and look it......so u might as well chill wit who wants to chill wit you....


Black don’t crack has some interesting side effects ....many I believe only resonate with our community

 

[seabreeze80]

Yeah, that's foul. The first sign something was wrong was him wanting be up under you all the time. If you have a life that doesn't happen.

If he was saying he was in college, you didn't wonder how can he be in school, and getting shyt done if he was up under you all the time?

He looked like he could have passed for a graduate student. There were adult learners in all my classes. I didn't think anything of it until he confessed. I was always busy. When I wasn't in class I was working my ass off. I didn't party like other college students. I didn't have time to observe him and I didn't have the experience to compare him to other men. He knew that and I think he initially went after me because I came off quiet and docile.

 

[semicko82]

It's hypocrisy also because if the genders were reversed it would be not nearly as much outrage.
They made a mainstream movie celebrating the love between 40 year old woman and 20 something year old man

 

[fckyoupayme]

@xCivicx I took the “some of y’all females” line as a shot. My bad if it wasn’t meant that way People be coming reckless on here sometimes so I’m always ready with the snap back

 

[truth2you]

He looked like he could have passed for a graduate student. There were adult learners in all my classes. I didn't think anything of it until he confessed. I was always busy. When I wasn't in class I was working my ass off. I didn't party like other college students. I didn't have time to observe him and I didn't have the experience to compare him to other men. He knew that and I think he initially went after me because I came off quiet and docile.

Well now you know, but if you are really what you say you are, and you know how to look good when you go out, plus not combative meaning brings peace to the home, get an older man who has something to give. I hate to see chicks like you get with guys who just sell them dreams, and hopes, only for none of it to pan out, and she turns bitter. Older women like that are just so depressing, they seem to have a cloud over them. If he is trying to do it for real, then support him, but if he is not making moves, and you meet an older man who has it already, go with the older man. Once you get older, and see how hard life is, you really hit the lottery with the older man. Again, I'm talking about one who has his life together

 

[seabreeze80]

Well now you know, but if you are really what you say you are, and you know how to look good when you go out, plus not combative meaning brings peace to the home, get an older man who has something to give. I hate to see chicks like you get with guys who just sell them dreams, and hopes, only for none of it to pan out, and she turns bitter. Older women like that are just so depressing, they seem to have a cloud over them. If he is trying to do it for real, then support him, but if he is not making moves, and you meet an older man who has it already, go with the older man. Once you get older, and see how hard life is, you really hit the lottery with the older man. Again, I'm talking about one who has his life together

I'm not interested in older men. I view older men like I view men with kids. Never again. Those types of relationships are not for me. I will always view them as predator type relationships and if I had a daughter I would advise her to date men her own age. 5 year older gap is ok but any man older than that, I'm not with it. My current bf is only 1 year older than me and we are doing well.

 

[truth2you]

I'm not interested in older men. I view older men like I view men with kids. Never again. Those types of relationships are not for me. I will always view them as predator type relationships and if I had a daughter I would advise her to date men her own age. 5 year older gap is ok but any man older than that, I'm not with it. My current bf is only 1 year older than me and we are doing well.

All that will change once you get older, see how hard life is(especially for black people), and meet well established men, time changes everything!

But it might not. you might just get a regular job, and live life like most people, its not a bad thing. I'm just saying if you are really like you say, you are a catch, and a man of means will try to scoop you up. I suspect you never been to upscale spots like that, am I right?

 

[David_TheMan]

I'm 36, I've had girlfriends that are 19 20