Advice For A First Time Father

[Jesus Is Lord]

Be INTENTIONAL in everything you do. PLAN things that you want to do with him/her NOW. TOGETHER with your girl.

Make sure you INTENTIONALLY raise that child with the CHARACTER essentials. TOGETHER with your girl.

Prepare NOW for their teenage years. The growing pains and gains. TOGETHER with your girl.

SAVE MONEY whenever you can. I don’t care if it’s only 10-$20 a week. TOGETHER with your girl.

Be intentional in not yelling at them, especially at the toddler stage. There’s no need to yell at a toddler, unless you’re trying to stop them from causing harm to themselves or others. If you pay attention and nurture that child, yelling won’t be needed.


DONT LOSE YOUR COOL with their mistakes. They’re children, children make mistakes, even being defiant is a mistake, they don’t know. But once you teach them, it’s no longer a mistake , it’s most likely intentional. And still try to remain level headed in your disappointment. Express DISAPPOINTMENT, not anger. It makes a difference.


I have so much advice breh. PM me if needed.

 

[Arianne Martell]

I appreciate those words. We are for sure going to breast pump so I can do my part - I think it's good for me to be able to have that bonding as well with baby girl.

We were thinking for the first few months putting a bassinet just right next to us when we sleep until she's old enough for the crib in the nursery. You think that would work or maybe too tough for us to sleep at all?

a havard study recommends parents co sleep with baby until they are 1 to prevent SID

 

[skylove4]

Always buy the huge boxes of diapers.They’re a better value and try to talk your girl out of using that high ass Dreft detergent, my wife would only use that

 

[MoveForward]

Do not let your baby sleep in the bed with you. Once you let them in your bed it’s over. I got an almost 3 year old that think our bed is his bed. I haven’t slept through the night in 3 years

I just got my son out of the bed with me and he's five. I woke up last night and he was balled up at the foot of the bed because he knows if he woke me up I would've told him to go back to his room.

 

[OPTiMO]

Where do I start....


1. If guys had issues before, especially when it comes to running the household...it will be magnify to the ^1111000093492092


2. Layout a plan starting now who is responsible for what...so you don’t have to constantly ask her to do xyz and vise versa; all involve must know their role and responsibility.


3. Having an organized household is extremely important to reduce stress and focus more on your blessing

4. have your finances in order, who is paying for what; daycare depending where you live is expensive.


5. Read books...baby first year helped me a lot. Everyone is going to come at you with all types of advise on how to care for your child, reading books will give you an independent POV that you can shut the noise of others and pick and leave their advises.


6. Have your baby on a schedule; babies are really smart and they love structure. Tell your girl to look up newborn routine on Pinterest or google.maternity leave is a bytch and a routine keeps you moving.

7. you don’t need a lot of baby clothes focus more and toddler clothes and shoes. Diapers and wipes.

8. toys are great; specially those that are gear towards motor skills, it gets them tired and ready for a nap....it should be feed, play, nap through the day and the night routine


9. Read read read read read read to your child every night as part of your night routine. My son knew his ABCs and Count from 1-10 as a 1 year old.

10. know each other parenting goals.

11. never sit back and let her do everything.

12. you are not going to sleep for awhile. So plan how you guys are going to tackle waking up in the middle of the night. If she is breast feeding this can be hard to do that’s why is important that during the day she has help so that she can get some sleep.

13. if she is breast feeding and going to work after maternity leave, tell her to pump after or during when she is feeding the baby so she can start storing her breast milk.

14. start potty training at 18 months.
that’s all I got.

15. have vitamin D on your baby shower list; the baby needs to take it for a year.




oh yeah congratulations!

These are those gems I was talking about! Thanks bro.

Already bought hella books, I was thinkingthat was for sure part of the plan. As far as a schedule goes, you mean like feeding at a certain hour? Any way to get the baby on more of a night sleeping schedule? Probably not, but you never know.

Luckily my girl works from home right now, though I know that puts a huge burden on her.

 

[OPTiMO]

Enjoy each moment.

NOTHING in the world is more important than your family now. Married or not. Treat ur girl and newborn as family.

There's no more u. It's US. Don't forget that.

Always put ur child and partner first. Above family, parents etc.

Be a parent. Ur kid will remember everything it's scary. Keep them smiling man.

Best thing in the world is being a father. Bless up.

thats too real. Thank you.

 

[JoseLuisGotcha]

Damn this thread giving me baby fever

 

[Arianne Martell]

These are those gems I was talking about! Thanks bro.

Already bought hella books, I was thinkingthat was for sure part of the plan. As far as a schedule goes, you mean like feeding at a certain hour? Any way to get the baby on more of a night sleeping schedule? Probably not, but you never know.

Luckily my girl works from home right now, though I know that puts a huge burden on her.

Schedule during the day and then a night routine letting your baby know it’s lights out (make sure room is dark) babies are going to tell you when they are hungry

newborns need to constantly eat, at least every 3 hours...so in the beginning you just have to get up and feed them...as they get older and bigger they may sleep longer...it all depends on your baby tho, but you have to set up the environment to encourage that.

as a new mom, I was doing it all wrong...lost...then I got with googling cause I was like this can’t be life...the I found this: The EASY baby routine explained | GoodtoKnow

E(eat).A(activity).S(leep).Y(ou time)

After that it was easy! Only thing I didn’t workout like I was suppose...was so tired during the day.


And the “sleep when the baby sleep” advise is bullshyt.

 

[OPTiMO]

a havard study recommends parents co sleep with baby until they are 1 to prevent SID

SID? Fill me in on that one - no idea what it means

 

[Arianne Martell]

SID? Fill me in on that one - no idea what it means

SID is sudden infant death syndrome— here is the article Room sharing with your baby may help prevent SIDS—but it means everyone gets less sleep - Harvard Health Blog

also enroll in the American pediatrics academy newsletter

choose a Black pediatrician if available in your area

Take an infant and toddler CPR class

Also invest in baby/delivery class

 

[OPTiMO]

Schedule during the day and then a night routine letting your baby know it’s lights out (make sure room is dark) babies are going to tell you when they are hungry

newborns need to constantly eat, at least every 3 hours...so in the beginning you just have to get up and feed them...as they get older and bigger they may sleep longer...it all depends on your baby tho, but you have to set up the environment to encourage that.

as a new mom, I was doing it all wrong...lost...then I got with googling cause I was like this can’t be life...the I found this: The EASY baby routine explained | GoodtoKnow

E(eat).A(activity).S(leep).Y(ou time)

After that it was easy! Only thing I didn’t workout like I was suppose...was so tired during the day.


And the “sleep when the baby sleep” advise is bullshyt.

I appreciate the link - I will be sharing it with my girl.

I'm the type of person that can't sleep during the day time no matter what - so yeah I see why sleeping when the baby sleeps is not ideal.

 

[Amerikan Melanin]

Here is a warning. You are having a baby girl. Your heart is going to open up in ways you didn’t know was possible. Being a girl dad is the best blessing and the worst curse. Nobody gonna love you like your daughter.

 

[MaxBundles]

Do not let your baby sleep in the bed with you. Once you let them in your bed it’s over. I got an almost 3 year old that think our bed is his bed. I haven’t slept through the night in 3 years

All facts.....all facts

 

[chineebai]

Congrats. You'll learn a lot. My advice is to enjoy the process, the experience, and be patient. One day when she's all grown up you'll miss that stage. Have fun, spend as much time as you can with her. As they get older you have to really spend quality time, create memorable experiences, and be a great role model. One thing that I did was tracking stages too much like month 8 they should crawl but really every baby is different and you shouldn't compare and track too much. I personally wouldnt have a baby sleep by themselves, instead you can buy a small cot for the bed if you're scare of them sleeping with you in the same bed.

Again, be extremely patient. Treat cries as good natural reactions and communication from babies instead of something annoying.

 

[Take It In Blood]