Batman and Robin: Pure Fukkery

[Ziggiy]

She wasn't even Barbara Gordon breh..she was Barbara Pennyworth..threw that man Gordon to the bushes and made her related to Alfred, the worst butler of all time

God damn MORE fukkERY!!! See it would be a bit more realistic if she was Barbara Gordon, ass kicking daughter of the police commissioner. I'm sure commissioner Gordon would've taught his daughter a few hand to hand fighting techniques to keep the wolves at bay. But Barbara Pennyworth, spoiled niece of the worlds most incompetent butler? That bytch couldn't even win a fukking drag race without dikk literally saving her, but she's got the fighting expertise of a ninja

 

[MartyMcFly]

God damn MORE fukkERY!!! See it would be a bit more realistic if she was Barbara Gordon, ass kicking daughter of the police commissioner. I'm sure commissioner Gordon would've taught his daughter a few hand to hand fighting techniques to keep the wolves at bay. But Barbara Pennyworth, spoiled niece of the worlds most incompetent butler? That bytch couldn't even win a fukking drag race without dikk literally saving her, but she's got the fighting expertise of a ninja

WORD! and her excuse was: She got into some rough shyt at school or when she dropped out of school or whatever...Bruce was trained by ninjas..Bruce trained Grayson so where did she learn to fight?? ON A FARM?!

And again, in Batman Forever, Bruce didn't want Grayson to get involved..in Batman Returns and Batman, Alfred wanted Bruce to stop in order to save his life..why in the fukk would you willingly allow your own flesh and blood, who hasn't been trained by anyone, to sign up for this job?

 

[Czerka]

honestly, i re-watched batman returns last week, and it was just as bad, if not worse.

 

[Kaypain]

Vivica A. Fox

 

[MartyMcFly]

honestly, i re-watched batman returns last week, and it was just as bad, if not worse.

Quiet as kept, I copped the blu ray for like $5 from best buy back in October and it is such a tough sit. As much crap as Schumacher gets for what he did, it really started with Batman Returns:

The Penguin drives a motorized ducky and he's running for freaking mayor

Catwoman falls out of a building and is revived by...cats.

Batman really does nothing the whole movie and yet wins...he meets Penguin in the street and lets him gets away AND lets cat woman get away twice..not to mention he throws fukkin acid at her.

Penguin's master plan goes awry because Batman stops the ONE train penguin had to get all the first born kids in Gotham..this is your master plan and you couldn't put a little more planning into it?

Commissioner Gordon is still useless

Alfred is still inept

And Batman is just so damn reactionary. Penguin SHOOTS AT PEOPLE IN A PARK and where's batman? Fixing his damn car..suddenly he's more interested in being a mechanic than saving lives

 

[jwinfield]

I was 11 when this came out and even THEN I knew it was bad...I had the same feeling watching this that I had as a 8 year old watching super mario bros..the constant on my face said it all.

Alfred encrypted a CD WITH BATMAN'S SECRET on it and chose THE MOST OBVIOUS PASSWORD in the world..only to have his niece crack the code, which then played a recording of Alfred in the bat cave which speaks directly to her on some Jor-El shyt and she says she wants to help Bruce and dikk..guess what Alfred's response is? "I knew you'd say that." Meaning that he not only planned for his niece eventually wanting to fight crime, a position he as recently as two movies ago wanted Bruce to stop doing, but also assumed that he would fail at keeping said secret...Alfred Pennyworth, the world's worse butler.

I have to watch this tonight, forgot about this dumb shyt, especially the batman card

 

[DaylitoJames]

We calling Alfred Pennyworth the worst butler on here? We gonna act like Harry Osbourne's butler wasn't worse from the original Spider-Man trilogy? He KNEW from the end of the first movie that Spiderman didn't kill Green Goblin but he waited all the way until damn near the 3rd movie with half of Harry's face blown off like he's Two-Face when he decides to say "By the way Harry Spiderman didn't kill your pappy and I have proof since the first movie... " I was like

 

[MartyMcFly]

We calling Alfred Pennyworth the worst butler on here? We gonna act like Harry Osbourne's butler wasn't worse from the original Spider-Man trilogy? He KNEW from the end of the first movie that Spiderman didn't kill Green Goblin but he waited all the way until damn near the 3rd movie with half of Harry's face blown off like he's Two-Face when he decides to say "By the way Harry Spiderman didn't kill your pappy and I have proof since the first movie... " I was like

Nope...Alfred, at least this iteration of Alfred, had ONE main job to do...keep Bruce's secret. So let's see how he did at that job:

1. He let Vicki Vale into the bat cave
2. He made a Robin suit for Grayson after Bruce told him not to let him be a part of this and he got caught slipping which is the only reason Grayson found out the secret.
3. Well I already stated how he handled the situation with his niece
4..He..Let..Vicki Vale..into..the damn batcave.

Harry's butler was inept yeah of course but his ineptness came from a screenwriter needing to write himself out of a jam and a proposterous use of deus ex machina...Alfred's ineptness in the Burton/Schumacher flicks all came from character. Alfred failed at his main job on numerous occasions

 

[DaylitoJames]

..... well I tried Alfred but I can't deny the argument you suck/

 

[MartyMcFly]

..... well I tried Alfred but I can't deny the argument you suck/

it's all good homie...I didn't even mention that in Batman Forever...AFTER he got caught slipping and Grayson did his olympic style flips to get into the bat cave, apparently he LET THE MAN STEAL THE BATMOBILE...he calls Bruce on some "He took the car, sir" all angry and shyt when he really should've said "I didn't kick him out of the bat cave when I should've and I let him take the car, sir."

 

[Ziggiy]

honestly, i re-watched batman returns last week, and it was just as bad, if not worse.

Nah bruh, the fukkery in Batman Returns is Tim Burton's own special brand of zany insanity at its finest. That flick is fukking masterpiece of bringing a comic book to life while still showing respect for the source material but embracing all of the inherent craziness. Danny Devito's body getting ceremoniously thrown into the water by the penguins had me like As a kid. Michelle Phipher getting LICKED BACK TO LIFE by those cats. Batman Returns is an example of GOOD fukkERY.

 

[wire28]

lol my mans is right this is one of the best WOAT movies. a classic so horribly bad its ingrained in your memory and you must watch it whenever its on for the fukkery :deamanny:

I was 11 when this came out and even THEN I knew it was bad...I had the same feeling watching this that I had as a 8 year old watching super mario bros..the constant on my face said it all.

Alfred encrypted a CD WITH BATMAN'S SECRET on it and chose THE MOST OBVIOUS PASSWORD in the world..only to have his niece crack the code, which then played a recording of Alfred in the bat cave which speaks directly to her on some Jor-El shyt and she says she wants to help Bruce and dikk..guess what Alfred's response is? "I knew you'd say that." Meaning that he not only planned for his niece eventually wanting to fight crime, a position he as recently as two movies ago wanted Bruce to stop doing, but also assumed that he would fail at keeping said secret...Alfred Pennyworth, the world's worse butler.

 

[Czerka]

Nah bruh, the fukkery in Batman Returns is Tim Burton's own special brand of zany insanity at its finest. That flick is fukking masterpiece of bringing a comic book to life while still showing respect for the source material but embracing all of the inherent craziness. Danny Devito's body getting ceremoniously thrown into the water by the penguins had me like As a kid. Michelle Phipher getting LICKED BACK TO LIFE by those cats. Batman Returns is an example of GOOD fukkERY.

movie was horrible have you watched it as an adult. i used to think it was a good movie till i saw the blu ray last week. im afraid to watch the first batman again because that was a staple of my childhood

 

[MartyMcFly]

movie was horrible have you watched it as an adult. i used to think it was a good movie till i saw the blu ray last week. im afraid to watch the first batman again because that was a staple of my childhood

The first batman holds up actually. There are a FEW parts of it that make you but other than that, it works. Keaton is dope as Batman, Nicholson is a good Joker...but yeah give it a watch man you'll be surprised. Kevin Smith did two commentary tracks, one for Batman and one for Batman Returns and they're entertaining as fuk. He and this writer for The Hollywood Reporter (he's black) and they're hilarious

 

[Bruce Wayne]

As a Batman fan you have to watch it..there are maybe TWO watchable scenes in it quality wise..the scenes with Bruce and Alfred but other than that...Pure..Fukkery. They followed Vince McMahon's edict: It's not supposed to be good.

The Movie looks like they spent even more Money on the CGI so I may just actually Buy it just to Complete my Collection in Full HD.