Black birder celebrity Jason Ward accused of rape

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Kenwins01

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El Negro Suave said:
I agree... and that's one of the red flags I mentioned. However, she also mentioned that when they had a discussion about the incident he looked at it like the situation with the kiss. He wanted to kiss her the first time but thought better of it, after they spent more time together he went for it and she was receptive. He tried to initiate sex in the same way and she shut him down, he allowed time to pass and chose that moment to try and initiate again. By her own admission, her fear caused her to freeze. She didn't tell him no, or to stop. And once he saw her crying and realized she wasn't okay-- in her own words-- he stopped, and immediately took her home. He didn't drug her or punch her into the dirt and savage her.

So even though I absolutely agree with you, I won't say he's a victim per se- but he is a cautionary tale. We live in a society that says men have to initiate everything. The initial contact. The exchange of numbers. The first date. First kiss. Sex. Marriage. I just think it's intellectually dishonest to take something as complex and nuanced as human interaction and and apply a black and white label to events influenced by emotions. I know people like to pretend online, but the vast majority of guys have had to play this "cat and mouse" game with women. Many of them marry those same women and have children.

So I suppose the real question is how do you ensure something like this doesn't happen to women OR men? What sort of legal instrument do you propose be created to protect both parties prior to intercourse of any kind?
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Very well stated my g
 
jj23

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This is one of those conflicting situations.

It's clear a lot of stuff was misread on his part, but what he did was rape, and now he is going to be punished for it.

It's rough but that's the way things go in this society.

Hopefully he will learn his lesson and not self harm.
 
Flywin Lannister

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El Negro Suave said:
I agree... and that's one of the red flags I mentioned. However, she also mentioned that when they had a discussion about the incident he looked at it like the situation with the kiss. He wanted to kiss her the first time but thought better of it, after they spent more time together he went for it and she was receptive. He tried to initiate sex in the same way and she shut him down, he allowed time to pass and chose that moment to try and initiate again. By her own admission, her fear caused her to freeze. She didn't tell him no, or to stop. And once he saw her crying and realized she wasn't okay-- in her own words-- he stopped, and immediately took her home. He didn't drug her or punch her into the dirt and savage her.

So even though I absolutely agree with you, I won't say he's a victim per se- but he is a cautionary tale. We live in a society that says men have to initiate everything. The initial contact. The exchange of numbers. The first date. First kiss. Sex. Marriage. I just think it's intellectually dishonest to take something as complex and nuanced as human interaction and and apply a black and white label to events influenced by emotions. I know people like to pretend online, but the vast majority of guys have had to play this "cat and mouse" game with women. Many of them marry those same women and have children.

So I suppose the real question is how do you ensure something like this doesn't happen to women OR men? What sort of legal instrument do you propose be created to protect both parties prior to intercourse of any kind?
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You are right about societal constructs.
Most men and women have played the cat and mouse game (it’s the courting game) and the game is important to figure out if there is something more than maybe a vague interest there. But most men or women do not push someone up against a tree and rape them.

You are walking down a dark street that is called victim blaming by listing how she froze up, saying that “in her own words” he at one point stopped. It’s like someone pummelling you and stopping and someone saying “Well in your own words they did stop when you lost your second tooth after a kick.” It takes the focus away from the criminal act and places focus on the victim.

How do we ensure this doesn’t happen to women or men:

  • without clear consent you do not have sex
    the first time, or any time especially when things are young. Not saying you should not have clear consent from a steady girlfriend or boyfriend, but an established relationship generally (not always) includes mutual sexual consent- but then still partners communicate, nobody just has sec without checking with their partner (unless that is their agreement).
  • Clear consent is not vague consent
  • By listening, she said she was not ready
  • By not pushing people to trees, saying you’ll bend them over and fukk them and then doing it could also help
  • By being real: you want hookups? Then don’t act like you’re in love. Find consenting partners to have loveless sex with.

It is refreshing to read a thought through comment on here, that is rare by Coli standards @El Negro Suave
 
BaggerofTea

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Better game and a weight loss plan would have helped this brother avoid this situation entirely :francis:
 
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Wargames said:
He sent an apology text after raping someone :dahell:

So he’s a rapist and a fukking idiot

:gucci:
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could be misleading. 1. We don’t know if that text is from him. 2. We don’t know what specifically he’s apologizing for. There’s nothing about rape or sex assault in that conversation.
 
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TheBigBopper

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GodinDaFlesh said:
Same here:snoop: Guess we're just supposed to watch a brother's life go up in flames based on hearsay and without his side of the story smh.
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seriously. Why are we supposed to automatically believe the accuser when there’s no evidence ? That text conversation could be taken out of context. Canceling someone on just accusations is immoral.
 
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