Peri,ElleI went to therapy, therapist sold me dreams
I meant to say this in the other thread but I am in a different city so I don't have free time to talk on the board much.
1. You are a DC chick, ya'll are shytty because your environment doesn't value ppl much less relationships. Everyone is for themselves and can make you jaded plus your friends ain't shyt either and you need to drop them. Once you realize environment is an issue. Then move to 2.
2. You need to change your surroundings. Start hanging with married women. Start dealing with ppl who have what you want in future and they have it in there's but it's healthy. Start looking into the "right" church and that's hard to do in DC. So many wrong churches there.
3. Your past has shaped you and will play a role into your future BUT it doesn't define you. You can't change the fact that you have been a thot. You can't change the fact that you truly enjoy the sex that you are used to. You can't change that but what you can do is change your gameplan. First, start with you. The best way to judge what you want is to education yourself on what women who are "Great catches" i.e. wife material are doing. It's a different mentality. They value different things. Loyalty. Understanding relationships are hard and honesty is a must not a given. That ALL relationships need a foundation. That's something I explained from Day 1 with my lady and it continues to play a key role through our trials and errors.
4. Goals. What are you trying to achieve in life? What is he trying to achieve? What is your interest? What are is? The more they match, the better your chances of a successful relationship is.
5. Confidence. Your shyt is fukked up. You sound pathetic to most of these nikkas but it's good because weaknesses when you are trying to fix them are usually a major step in the process. Anyone who has changed will tell you that. I know I been through it before and it wasn't fun. Do things to keep your confidence up that don't involve a man's or woman's approval. That usually starts with having a foundation, i.e. a rock in your life that you can rely on when times are tough.
6. Get to understand a man, not the presentation or package but the entire person. Far too often, you been looking at packages and that's a sign for failure. Men aren't packages. They aren't singular. That same man you think is hard on hoes is one of the most soft brothers when dealing w/ XnX issue. Learn about the man. Understand that he's an individual. That will help you tremendously. Talk to @Elle Driver and @Queen. They can even tell you some of the changes they made. While Elle's story is nothing like yours, she been through it as well. She was heartless at one time and now she's a God-loving mother who is married to a good man for her.
7. Consider yourself blessed. You have a career. You are educated to a degree. Great health. A loving family. Ppl that care about you. You have a good life, don't forget that and always count your blessing and be blessed for what you got. Humble always wins in the long term.
8. Always listen but disifeper. One of the most important traits for a man or woman single or in a relationship.
9. You might have a social disorder. I been noticing you kinda off the rails at times and you struggle at putting your thoughts together when you are telling a story from A-Z. Now most ppl just brush it off but I think it has a lot of effect on relationships. A lot of men aren't like woman, they will treat you like it's all good till the day they decide enough is enough. You might want to look into that. That can weigh heavily on a relationship for either sex.
10. Pray, it's simple, get down on your knees at pray. Ask for forgiveness, give him what you would like, ask him to prepare you for your best option and give yourself unto him and not into someone who doesn't have your best interest at heart.
I hoped that helped.
I still think I might not get it