Black Girl Lawst....Help!!!

[Barnett114]

@PeridotPuss

 

[PeridotPuss]

DAMN! How long were ya'll engaged/date? How old were ya'll?
One year isn't actually that long to be single/not dating, granted you use that time to get your mind right and re-evaluate what you want, and more importantly how realistic it is.

As for the bolded, what was breh doing with his life that you were the breadwinner and was it gonna be a permanent thing? You might be the type to try to save ain't shyt men and then complain that men ain't shyt.

What kind of guys are you looking for and are you regularly in an environment where you have a chance to interact with them?

We were friends (but not close friends)from teenage years, got together when I was 25 and he was 28 broke up when I was 27 and he was 31.

Engaged 6 months.

I gave him a chance because I used to have all kinds of standards about job, character, religion, family upbringing,etc.

I have HIM a chance despite his money bc I thought he cared about me and I was dealing with him for the RIGHT reasons like love and trust

When it was all said and done all he could say was he was insecure and made mistakes but still loves me v and wants to marry me

MEan while I'm like THIS IS MY LIFE I could have AIDS right now, why couldn't you just DO RIGHT ???

But apparently I'm bitter for not ponying up and trying to trust again I'm just tryna figure if we're all oUT here telling each other a bunch of BS or if I'm a legit black girl lawst

 

[Verbal Kint]

This is good advice but I'm PAST that. I've been single for a year, I only recently started coli-in because I was ALREADY spending so much time alone.

I took this time because my LAST relationship ended in an engagement that ended because he cheated. I did what I was supposed to do...was faithful, honest and willing to be the breadwinner.

THAT breakup was a final straw of sorts so I'm not suffering from magical man syndrome I'm suffering from the fukk ITS but everyone is saying at MY AGE if I go bitter now I'll never marry and I'll regret it later

I currently feel like I should probably be single and permanently. ....but that permanenty part is the "damage" I've heard

28

I feel your pain. Find you a lame cat that'll be so happy to have a woman that he'll fall over himself to keep you. Actually that's terrible advice cause eventually you'll get tired of the nikka being clingy
then probably slip your number to some metrosexual cat at the Polo store. Then homie will be listening to the first verse of this joint on loop

 

[sfgiants]

Marriage isn't meant for everybody
Neither is this unrealistic concept of "love" where everything is perfect and people aren't scumbags

Maybe you're meant to be alone.

U gota learn to accept being with yourself and doing things alone and not be dependent on other people to feel happy or fulfilled. Buy a cactus or cat they're low maintenance but it gives you something to care about.

I've dated girls like you and I can sense their weird demonic energy, I immediately dismiss them as serious relationship material and make sure I wear condoms every time. You probably have ig with a ton of pics n followers and are on snap chat and shyt

Take a trip abroad by ur self but don't fukk any tour guides or ppl u meet. You may find out things about ur self during ur time alone

 

[DrX]

she could always date @HankHill and sleep on his twin bed next to him in his 12 x 12 apt....dont worry tho, hes working his way up from bartender to dept manager at the job

 

[Raava]

Hey Mike YES IT'S DEEP and I'm not too ashamed to ask for help

I don't understand men

Off jump my perspective is this man doesn't like me, is already lying to me or hiding something probably something small like a lingering ex or a chick who might be pregnant, he wants my sex as quickly as possible with as little effort as possible and okay that's fine so I think we'll what do I want? I'm not going to get true love or commitment so.....sex is cool I like sex

And I've just been leaving it there

I don't want to be sold the dreams....I rarely see those dreams coming true

From your stories and this post it seems like you ignore all the red flags and when it hits the fan you are like y'all are all the same.

You have to let go of the past and let people prove who they are. They will always show you and when they show you let them go. That doesn't mean be stupid. It's the opposite be smart. No one can sale you dreams of you don't buy them. Slow down. You can have the mind set that he just wants sex, and act accordingly if that's is what you want. If that's not all you want, you have to act accordingly.

This means if all you want is sex ok. But if not slow down and see what he is all about. That is the time you look for red flags. You said if all he wants is sex ok, but is that what you want? The therapist probably gave you a lot self help stuff because it doesn't seem like you value yourself. You are arrogant but at the same time do things that makes it seem like you don't value yourself. The arrogance is shallow and men see that.

A guy will treat you however you allow them. Men probably approach you, putting you on one level and then see you don't put yourself there. You need a new therapist to help you let go of the baggage.

 

[PeridotPuss]

So you're telling me all the men you been with
they all did you dirty?

No I did some dirt too and when I speak in men its not just ME it's like friends family and my own shyt...

nikkas do A LOT of foul shyt and women are just expected to aceept it as normal and forgive

 

[iBrowse]

If you can't get her on the right path idk who can.

 

[Moshe.]

u should get with a unattractive dude, because hell feel like he hit the jackpot and cherish u

just upgrade him, but not to the point he run off and leave u after his status is up


or u could date outside your race i dont want no trouble coli

how about you stop posting?

 

[PeridotPuss]

Maybe you're meant to be alone.

this is where I'm at now honestly

 

[#SOG_soldier]

Thread is stupid and op is a fakkit so.......

 

[Mowgli]

last night's hoe tales derailment debacle of a thread got me thinking..... listen and learn from those who not tryna troll.... a brehette really could use some productive advice and I know it's some gurus on on here....

So long story short, I'm no victim and no angel but 11 years of dating as left a bytch jaded.....I want to stop seeing men as an enemy to my life and future but thus far have been unable to. The game might have sucked me dry.

Ive also accepted that I'm not relationship material due to my mindset towards males....everyone tells me I'm wrong....but I feel like I have the right outlook
Help!!! black girl Lawst no booty derailments please

There's no hope for you I'm sorry. When you're in your late 40s you will get another chance at love when you've completely accepted the fact you're old and busted with a large twat. Wait it out. A lot if old black thots that stay in shape come up on Simps with money when they get close to 50-60. You don't see a lot of 60 year old size queens out here

 

[Elle Driver]

If you can't get her on the right path idk who can.

I charge for that.

 

[PeridotPuss]

From your stories and this post it seems like you ignore all the red flags and when it hits the fan you are like y'all are all the same.

You have to let go of the past and let people prove who they are. They will always show you and when they show you let them go. That doesn't mean be stupid. It's the opposite be smart. No one can sale you dreams of you don't buy them. Slow down. You can have the mind set that he just wants sex, and act accordingly if that's is what you want. If that's not all you want, you have to act accordingly.

This means if all you want is sex ok. But if not slow down and see what he is all about. That is the time you look for red flags. You said if all he wants is sex ok, but is that what you want? The therapist probably gave you a lot self help stuff because it doesn't seem like you value yourself. You are arrogant but at the same time do things that makes it seem like you don't value yourself. The arrogance is shallow and men see that.

A guy will treat you however you allow them. Men probably approach you, putting you on one level and then see you don't put yourself there. You need a new therapist to help you let go of the baggage.

 

[Diondon]

No I did some dirt too and when I speak in men its not just ME it's like friends family and my own shyt...

nikkas do A LOT of foul shyt and women are just expected to aceept it as normal and forgive

No you're not supposed to tolerate bullshyt. Men or women
But it's also tied to your self worth.