Black Girl Lawst....Help!!!
- Thread starter PeridotPuss
- Start date
Then embrace it, maybe thats where you are meant to be.I can't even offer no assistance we both in the shadows
Some peope florish in the sunlight and some florish under the shadow of the Moon. It creates the biggest shadow. Its shadow is so strong that it enables you to create your own.
I find the shadow so beautiful.
@PeridotPuss
You need to get with some old school pimpin type real muthafukka to probe your mind and turn you to a real woman
You think nikkaz aint shyt right?
Well then bytch ask yourself ;
Why the fukk do you want to be in our presence?
You know got damn well you know you love our style ,charisma and swag
When you come across a real nikka your job is to help him preserve his realness
Make that man life better in small ways and always look to help in the smallest ways
For every real man you must do these things
That is your commandment now go forth and serve a real negus in all the ways you can
You need to get with some old school pimpin type real muthafukka to probe your mind and turn you to a real woman
You think nikkaz aint shyt right?
Well then bytch ask yourself ;
Why the fukk do you want to be in our presence?
You know got damn well you know you love our style ,charisma and swag
When you come across a real nikka your job is to help him preserve his realness
Make that man life better in small ways and always look to help in the smallest ways
For every real man you must do these things
That is your commandment now go forth and serve a real negus in all the ways you can
Light skin abuse? How sway?
You know.
@PeridotPuss. This isnt your mom being right or wrong, this is about you. Your experiences fit her description to a t because its been implanted in you and its wired to your brain. Know your needs over your wants personally before you step into another relationship. Know you worth, your purpose in life and energy will follow. We all struggle in this life but all through different areas but the struggle helps us realize there is a purpose for the success. Some of the posters in here dropped some real knowledge and points buts its up to you to absorb it and apply it thru your journey. Too bad you dont live near DMV area, i would love to hang to dig that brain.
Yall lonely,no p*ssy getting nikkas giving this bytch advice instead of taking advantage??
Some ol easy,light skin p*ssy done fell on your lap and you dont even know what to do with it
nikkas asking for pm screenshots so they can roast other nikkas
You say we don't get laid yet are suggesting we try to get with a chick from a message board
You tellin on yourself breh
@PeridotPuss
I'm imagining these are the type of dudes who have lead you to believe dudes ain't shyt
Art Barr
INVADING SOHH CHAMPION
You say we don't get laid yet are suggesting we try to get with a chick from a message board
You tellin on yourself breh
@PeridotPuss
I'm imagining these are the type of dudes who have lead you to believe dudes ain't shyt
That quick ether
That dude username
Get right with Jesus. This will also involve cleaning your life up and thoroughly inspecting yourself. Even Jesus told us, we are little more than what we think. Here's where I believe a lot of your problems started. When your mom told you men are not to be trusted and 'taught you a lesson' by hooking you up with that guy who did you wrong, it planted a seed in your mind to where the root of your thoughts are that 'men are all liars and cheats and me myself, I'm not worthy of a relationship'. When those are the root of your thoughts, all of your following thoughts will spring from that root and it will create a tree of frustration. You will constantly self-validate on how men are sneaks, liars and cheats and you will also find reasons as to why you aren't wifeable.
Let's be real here. There are a lot of men who are cheats and liars, but this is why you must develop extremely strong filtering criteria and learn to pick up on social patterns. Past filtering past unscrupulous men, you also have to know how to attract the man of quality. Do NOT fall for a guy just because he's some pretty boy or playa and can hit you with a smooth conversation. Look for an older woman who does have a successful relationship and ask her about what traits she had to look for to find her man. Ultimately, much of our success is dictated on the TYPE of person we CHOOSE to end up with. Based on the other thread, it seems like the type you ended up falling for were the 'fly dudes with a lot of swag' as opposed to really digging into these guy's personalities and seeing if they have a moral base. If there is no moral base there, then there will be no long-term relationship without infidelity. You cannot change these guys by giving them sex or placating them. If they aren't inherently moral, then you will face problems and that's the bottom line.
Next, you have to become what it is that you want. You can't expect a husband type, but you aren't the wife type.The problem in our day and age is that nobody knows the definition of anything anymore and they think they deserve anything just because they just show up. Here are a couple of things a family oriented man cherishes. He wants a woman that is chaste and he also wants a woman that is also family-oriented. If the first things out of your mouth are how you went to the club on the weekend, you are throwing out bait, but it's to attract the player rather than the family man. If you are always talking about a career and how you don't need a man, you're not really going to attract a man who is interested into you in the long-term unless he's one of those simps that think he can change your mind.
I can go on and on, but let me give you one more and maybe I'll stop back in here later with more. This one is extremely important. You need to realize the effects social conditioning has on you, and the majority of it comes from the television you watch. TV is called PROGRAMMING for a reason. When you program a computer, you give it instructions so that it does what the programmer wants it to do. When you sit around and watch television or other media, you are being programmed covertly to do what society's controllers want you to do. They have been focusing on women lately, selling women these false packages that they can 'have it all' and how women are princesses and have to put in no work, but some muscle bound rich price will come and rescue them from all of their problems despite their own worth. You cannot have it all. You can have what you pay for... meaning you can't completely wild out and make no commitment to a relationship, but expect some decent dude to come running. You have to pay the price of being that woman that is long-term material, and you have to realize that when you DO have the currency for that long-term relationship, you have to make sure you are buying the legit article... meaning if you are wifey material but you're giving those traits to a playa, you're still going to be played.
Finally, relationships are NOT non-stop entertainment and they are called commitment for a reason. Unlike what television tells you, you won't feel butterflies 24/7 and all of that nonsense. If you want that long-term relationship, you have to cultivate and PROTECT it. You can't let outside forces, whether it be your homegirls or some snake dudes trying to get at you, come in and undermine it and tell you how you need to find pleasure on the side.
Let's be real here. There are a lot of men who are cheats and liars, but this is why you must develop extremely strong filtering criteria and learn to pick up on social patterns. Past filtering past unscrupulous men, you also have to know how to attract the man of quality. Do NOT fall for a guy just because he's some pretty boy or playa and can hit you with a smooth conversation. Look for an older woman who does have a successful relationship and ask her about what traits she had to look for to find her man. Ultimately, much of our success is dictated on the TYPE of person we CHOOSE to end up with. Based on the other thread, it seems like the type you ended up falling for were the 'fly dudes with a lot of swag' as opposed to really digging into these guy's personalities and seeing if they have a moral base. If there is no moral base there, then there will be no long-term relationship without infidelity. You cannot change these guys by giving them sex or placating them. If they aren't inherently moral, then you will face problems and that's the bottom line.
Next, you have to become what it is that you want. You can't expect a husband type, but you aren't the wife type.The problem in our day and age is that nobody knows the definition of anything anymore and they think they deserve anything just because they just show up. Here are a couple of things a family oriented man cherishes. He wants a woman that is chaste and he also wants a woman that is also family-oriented. If the first things out of your mouth are how you went to the club on the weekend, you are throwing out bait, but it's to attract the player rather than the family man. If you are always talking about a career and how you don't need a man, you're not really going to attract a man who is interested into you in the long-term unless he's one of those simps that think he can change your mind.
I can go on and on, but let me give you one more and maybe I'll stop back in here later with more. This one is extremely important. You need to realize the effects social conditioning has on you, and the majority of it comes from the television you watch. TV is called PROGRAMMING for a reason. When you program a computer, you give it instructions so that it does what the programmer wants it to do. When you sit around and watch television or other media, you are being programmed covertly to do what society's controllers want you to do. They have been focusing on women lately, selling women these false packages that they can 'have it all' and how women are princesses and have to put in no work, but some muscle bound rich price will come and rescue them from all of their problems despite their own worth. You cannot have it all. You can have what you pay for... meaning you can't completely wild out and make no commitment to a relationship, but expect some decent dude to come running. You have to pay the price of being that woman that is long-term material, and you have to realize that when you DO have the currency for that long-term relationship, you have to make sure you are buying the legit article... meaning if you are wifey material but you're giving those traits to a playa, you're still going to be played.
Finally, relationships are NOT non-stop entertainment and they are called commitment for a reason. Unlike what television tells you, you won't feel butterflies 24/7 and all of that nonsense. If you want that long-term relationship, you have to cultivate and PROTECT it. You can't let outside forces, whether it be your homegirls or some snake dudes trying to get at you, come in and undermine it and tell you how you need to find pleasure on the side.
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I ain't gonna type a monologue ... all I can say is that you have sense and I feel like you know the antidote for your current dilemmas with men .. you're just a slave to your guilty pleasures when it comes to men ... like most females and vice versa with us .. only a few escape that mindset ... shyt i haven't either to keep it a buck
Blackout
just your usual nerdy brotha
You know that dating a black man with a caring and loving persolity is the way.
He may be nerdy or corny but he is what you need.
Im just waiting for you to look for that kinda guy if you are having these kind of problems.
He may be nerdy or corny but he is what you need.
Im just waiting for you to look for that kinda guy if you are having these kind of problems.
pimp shytall my life I've just taken what was given
everything i could get my hands on
never have i denied the love of many for just one
never have i played favorites
never pretended that anyone was mine
or that i was capable of belonging to anyone
my love is constant and it remains the same
if u choose to stay if u choose to leave
there was a brief moment where i contemplated in anguish
am i a monster for not conforming¿
that depression faded quickly
and i fell deep into a manic bliss
irretrievable and out of reach
the world at large irredeemable and lost to me
I'm not at fault and neither are they
i wasn't meant to know their pain
my love and my joy too great
modern days male marilyn magdalene madonna
feel me¿
*
Veeeerrrry solid advice
@PeridotPuss is too smart for her own good.
Its really that simple, her self esteem is not low, shes not depressed and she has plenty of common sense and book smarts. Its hard for people like her to take advice from anyone when they have experience in area are able to analyze and think logically and have plenty of common sense.
She's no saint, but most people aren't. Its just going to take time and more positive males in her life.... and even then the disdain she has for the "norm" when it comes to men and our behavior might be too great for her to accept men back in her life.. Once the anger and emotions start to settle you might be able to start accepting men in your life again. That could take years though, @PeridotPuss your alright and you dont need to look to rush to get over your feelings of distrust for men. Just keep growing like you have been...
Let it happen at its own pace, and if you notice its not happening at least you have already come to peace with the fact that you might just be far too deeply scarred to give your heart to a man and focus on bettering yourself and others around you.
Its really that simple, her self esteem is not low, shes not depressed and she has plenty of common sense and book smarts. Its hard for people like her to take advice from anyone when they have experience in area are able to analyze and think logically and have plenty of common sense.
She's no saint, but most people aren't. Its just going to take time and more positive males in her life.... and even then the disdain she has for the "norm" when it comes to men and our behavior might be too great for her to accept men back in her life.. Once the anger and emotions start to settle you might be able to start accepting men in your life again. That could take years though, @PeridotPuss your alright and you dont need to look to rush to get over your feelings of distrust for men. Just keep growing like you have been...
Let it happen at its own pace, and if you notice its not happening at least you have already come to peace with the fact that you might just be far too deeply scarred to give your heart to a man and focus on bettering yourself and others around you.
Have you ever considered getting into yoga or something similar?