Blavity article: Does hypermasculinity hinder black men from finding true love?

[Ziggiy]

I'm getting a little sick of that phrase

 

[Absalom's Thought]

.

 

[Ziggiy]

I read the article.

His overall point wasn't bad but it was VERY poorly written. A real chore to get through.

 

[How Sway?]

True love

If youre a man seeking so-called "true love" then you deserve whatever you get.

Just find some woman you can tolerate; fukk her, have your kids and die. Talmbout true love. Fakkit

Idk why I just bursted out laughing at the second paragraph

 

[Karb]

Didn't read but

It's always the soft/gay types who problematize masculinity

 

[Karb]

True love

If youre a man seeking so-called "true love" then you deserve whatever you get.

Just find some woman you can tolerate; fukk her, have your kids and die. Talmbout true love. Fakkit

 

[DarrynCobretti]

There's no such thing as "true love" or "soul mate". It's all chemical and hormonal reactions and exchanges taking place in your brain in various abrupt spurts.

I'm amused by the idea of "true love" or "soul mate" because those both magically come to an end when one finds out that their spouse is cheating or if a divorce is about to occur.

The words "love" and "in love" are nothing more than semantics. Making up cutesy names for biological processes is a method people use to take away from the reality of the situation. Might come as a surprise to you all, but that feeling that you get when you see a crush, the closeness that you feel being with a partner and the joy or pain you receive from their actions is nothing but neurochemicals sending oxytocin, vasporessin and dopamine down your neuronal pathways. Love is not an actual thing and does not exist. Its an evolutionary and neurological mechanism to get a species to procreate to avoid dying out.

What?

Love is a neurological process that takes place in the brain. The pupils dialate up to 75%, nonepinephrine production begins sending signals to the reward center of the brain, and an odorless hormone named Oxytocin is emitted. These are all neurochemical exchanges that take place in specific regions of the brain. That's too bad if this doesn't fit in your narrative of "love" being a harmonic magical soul connection - it is no such thing. It's a primitive neurobiological response embedded in all organisms - it's an evolutionary mechanism for procreation.

By the way, have you ever even looked up the definition of emotion? It's a physiological response, meaning that it deals with physical and chemical functions of an organism. Just like I've said, it's a chemically induced biological response.

emotion

[ih-moh-shuh n]
3.
any strong agitation of the feelings actuated by experiencing love,hate, fear, etc., and usually accompanied by certain physiological changes, as increased heartbeat or respiration, and often overt manifestation, as crying or shaking.

physiology

[fiz-ee-ol-uh-jee]
noun
1.
the branch of biology dealing with the functions and activities of living organisms and their parts, including all physical and chemical processes.

Were your intentions to debunk my stance? Because you've done no such thing.

Are you able comprehend this little thing called "context"? Re-read the post. I specifically said that love does not exist in the context that people place it in. It's semantics. It is not a "soul connection" "soul mate matching" it's neurochemicals and neurotransmitters working together to emit hormones that expedite attractions that lead to mating and the propagation of the species.

Facts.
Easily the best posts in this thread.

The hyperbole and the fairytail idealization of the sociological concept of "love" along with the hyper-visibility of phrases like "true love" and "soulmate" in the public sphere, reveals a deep lack of perspective and understanding that beneath it all - humans are merely animals that respond to stimuli like any other living organism on this planet.

Humans' romanticization of our animalistic behavior / instinctive physiological responses is hilarious. There's no "soul connection" or "spiritual attachment" involved with "love", and it's not "unconditional" nor inherently "forever".

 

[Diondon]

I'm too damn masculine

 

[ORDER_66]

What's wrong with being a man?!?! first women say we're too nice, too soft then, now we're too much of a man to find true love?!!? Women are ATTRACTED TO MEN?! And as a man wtf is hypermasculinity!??! It's called being a MAN...

True love?!!? when women find a good man they'll find some way to fukk it up then turn around and blame the man for it!!! in this day and age is True Love even feasible when the divorce rates is damn near 70% with WOMEN filing that shyt?! and with Articles like this you wonder why men DON'T want to get married at all...

 

[Amestafuu (Emeritus)]

There is no such thing as toxic masculinity or hypermasculinity

They are trying to break down everything that makes us MEN while feminists can openly exhibit strong prejudice against men.

You couldn't call feminine energy toxic in any context and expect to have an informed intellectual conversation. It's ridiculous. Don't let them normalize the notion that there is something wrong with actually being a man.

 

[The Mad Titan]

i think we're missing the forest from the trees with this one folks.

we can argue about the semantics of true love and what not but what we should be aspiring for is HEALTHY LONG TERM relationships. There isnt any data on the planet that refutes that healthy long term relationships arent beneficial.

The author is dead on about Black males. The "game" is seen as THE motivation to an obnoxious extent for us. For alot of us it is simply a matter of nurture. ALotta young men grew up with single parents and only saw their parents jumping from one warm bed to the next (especially in the case of fathers who become the stuff of hood legends if they were extra promiscuous in their prime). But a lot of us grew up with both parents and still think only with our dikks (i know I do).

And a vast part of young urban culture is dedicated to overtly sexualizing male to female interactions, learning and perfecting "the game", and overall embracing debauchery. I really dont see how anyone can argue against that.

Is it exclusive to Black Males? No but when you look at marriage rates, economic power, life spans, and all the correlations that spin off from broken homes, you quickly realize that the sexual hypermasculinity of black males probably isnt helping things either.

As a last thought, i think about all of my cousins and uncles who were legendary lotharios in their youth, but now are lonely. Speaking with my near 40 year old cousin two weeks ago, he's not happy. Hes fukked alot of women and outside of his daughter, has nothing to really show for it.

(Before anyone mentions it: yes, It goes both ways too. Black women already lacked alot of economic power as well prior to the sexually libertion of women, which can be argued made it worse for black women )

I can attest to this


Talk to alot of older men and there are 3 kinds lonely old single men, married men and happily married men.

 

[Rusty Kuntz]

I'm ugly as fukk and my dream goal is to marry a sugar momma

 

[Concerning VIolence]

even Romeo and Juliet was from like the 1800's

The 1800s, breh?

 

[Wear My Dawg's Hat]

There is no such thing as toxic masculinity or hypermasculinity

They are trying to break down everything that makes us MEN while feminists can openly exhibit strong prejudice against men.

You couldn't call feminine energy toxic in any context and expect to have an informed intellectual conversation. It's ridiculous. Don't let them normalize the notion that there is something wrong with actually being a man.

Only male behavior (and ESPECIALLY black male behavior) is now somehow "gendered."

Are those nightly female battles on VH1 the result of "toxic" masculinity, or femininity?

 

[Amestafuu (Emeritus)]

I ain't cute and I've had a couple sugar mommas

Bagged my first sugar momma coming off a construction gig works clothes on

some women dig the rugged look.. I ain't ugly neither tho