I wouldn't say it's cap more than men and women operate from different perspectives, therefore actions will always be perceived differently.
Most people really don't spend time actually getting to know one another and what they need from each other as partners, instead they try to fit into the stereotypical roles of a relationship.
This is why men can work 80 hours a week, pay all the bills and a woman will still be tight about not getting quality time because her actual needs aren't being met, only the ones he's decided for her. These same men will spend free time with their homeboys because to them, they are meeting the needs of their spouse and they don't see the problem.