My COVID job getting me depressed and giving me PTSD. The dying part is easy to digest because you know what these people have been to. Tou are happy they are finally at peace.
The worst part is when they know they gonna die and they are fully aware. They cannot breathe. They are scared. They cant talk. They giving you messages for their family. They are asking themselves questions as to why they cannot get better. They tell you they will try anything. Then you have to tell them that is all you got.
A guy I gave drugs too is hunting me. Dude took the drug from my hand. At the time he was fully awake. He took it and prayed on it. He mentionned his family who depends on him. His mother he has to care for. He told me stories about how he almost got killed several times. We talked about life. He told me regrets he had and best moments of his life. At the time he was talking and on some oxygen. Then, out of nowhere, 2 days later he had a heart attack and died. shyt fukked me up when the nurses told me. He was 45.
Another one is a Spanish girl who is a black militant. She has only Black friends because she told me her Latino part of family was racist to her because was too tan. She has small kids. She was always facetiming the kids and telling them how to do this and that. She was getting them ready for eLearning. Then I heard she had clots in her lungs. She had to get intubated cuz her oxygen levels were crap. Before they put the tube down her throat, she cried and pussed herself cuz she was so scared. All her organs shut down. All of them. She in the worst shape I ever seen a. COVID patient. Now all her 3 kids gonna live with no mother. She is 42.
I am telling y all this to say protect y all selves. This virus is no joke. Do not be selfish. A strain that is harmless to you might be deadly to your family. Be wise.
Also FL is not counting anything. The amount of cases I have daily to evaluate is piled up.
I am ooen to all questions if y all have any