Crazy things you believed as a kid

[OVER]

I believed 2 of my uncles and several cousins were in New York.

Drunk family friend: New York? Lil nikka them nikkas locked the fukk up.
Me:

Granted I was only 6-7 and every adult in my life told me the New York story, but I still should've known.

They used to tell us when we were young they were in the army when they'd get locked up. I remember there was an assembly when I was in grade school I guess it was for veterans day and dude was in uniform asked how many of us had family in the military I raised my arm, I was so proud to have a brother in the military

 

[NoChillJones]

I used to think eating feces would give you super powers



























I mean a friend

how much did you eat before you realize it in fact gives life threatening diseases......

 

[Kairi Irving]

how much did you eat before you realize it in fact gives life threatening diseases......

I said a friend

 

[Ms. Quick]

Seriously I thought there were two Michael Jacksons when I was really young. Blew my mind the same man in thriller video was the same in “do you remember the time” video.

i thought you could really float off a ledge or roof with an umbrella like the cartoons

My mom got her baby brother to do that back in the 70s. Straight up talked my uncle into jumping off the roof with an umbrella.

 

[NinoBrown]

- All Black people lived in Philadelphia
- Condoms were the size of a person (because of the movie Naked Gun had spoof scene of safe sex)
- Our body was made of sea shells
- Knight Rider was real
- It was easy to be a Ghostbuster
- The Starship Enterprise was real
- Mr. Clean can be summoned if you used him

 

[imp7]

I believed that if I broke my bacon/cookies/biscuits/any crispy food in a million pieces it would magically create more food. I was adamant af about this.

 

[General Mills]

1. I thought that at midnight all my toys came alive.

2. I thought eat burnt toast made your hair curly.

3. Was at recess as a kid. 1st or 2nd grade I think... This girl called one of the brehs a "pee pee head" . All the girls started laughing..So he yelled back your a nawww your a pee pee head!!

At this all the girls bust out in real laughs They said girls dont have pee pees you idiots!! Then one of the lil heifers said...Yall dont even know what girls have do you? Then they were all


Me and the fellas were perplexed as fukk I had a full set of encyclopedias at home i knew one of them had the anatomy of the human body. I told the brehs I would figure it out.

Came back to school the next day hype as fukk. We were going to son the fukk out of those chicks.

Told the fellas that the womens private parts are called the urethra. We called them ho's urethra heads the whole school year.

4. I thought that if you had no money all you had to do was write a check. Asked my mom for a toy and she said she had no money for it. I said write a check.

 

[Recca Gatsby]

Used to think animals talked & had parties & shyt when nobody was there

Lol

 

[Jamal514]

I used to think Rome was in Romania

 

[dontreadthis]

thought I knew Algebra in 2nd grade and that A = 1, B = 2, C = 3, etc and that's all there was to it.

 

[Canada Goose]

Used to think animals talked & had parties & shyt when nobody was there

@Pigeon

We don't talk (Well not in Human language at least) but we do party when nobody is around, I'm a DJ at these parties

 

[CreepyMcCreeperson]

Some older kids at the babysitter's house told me the puffy cheetos were poop dipped in cheese powder. I belieeved it, and only ate the crunchy

I used to think you could make pizza by putting a piece of white bread in the microwave, with tomato sauce, and a slice of american cheese. Obviously, it didn't work.

I thought the Boogeyman was a giant man made of blue boogers.

 

[Jay Kast]

I used to think that turning signals in the car were homing directions to wherever you needed to go.

This is probably why I am so bad at directions

I'd be sitting in the back seat of the car knocked out every time.

Whenever adults would ask, "Where is home?"



How the fukk am I supposed to know? We let the car handle that


YA BIG DUMMY!

 

[CreepyMcCreeperson]

1. I thought that at midnight all my toys came alive.

2. I thought eat burnt toast made your hair curly.

3. Was at recess as a kid. 1st or 2nd grade I think... This girl called one of the brehs a "pee pee head" . All the girls started laughing..So he yelled back your a nawww your a pee pee head!!

At this all the girls bust out in real laughs They said girls dont have pee pees you idiots!! Then one of the lil heifers said...Yall dont even know what girls have do you? Then they were all


Me and the fellas were perplexed as fukk I had a full set of encyclopedias at home i knew one of them had the anatomy of the human body. I told the brehs I would figure it out.

Came back to school the next day hype as fukk. We were going to son the fukk out of those chicks.

Told the fellas that the womens private parts are called the urethra. We called them ho's urethra heads the whole school year.

4. I thought that if you had no money all you had to do was write a check. Asked my mom for a toy and she said she had no money for it. I said write a check.

So you're saying kids have a G rated version of dikkhead????
All this time, I thought it meant your head was drenched in pee or something that had to do with urine.

I also thought the same thing about checks, and credit cards. My sister had Mall Madness, and I was legit thinking about stealing one of the fake credit cards.

 

[No Homo]

1. I thought that at midnight all my toys came alive.

2. I thought eat burnt toast made your hair curly.

3. Was at recess as a kid. 1st or 2nd grade I think... This girl called one of the brehs a "pee pee head" . All the girls started laughing..So he yelled back your a nawww your a pee pee head!!

At this all the girls bust out in real laughs They said girls dont have pee pees you idiots!! Then one of the lil heifers said...Yall dont even know what girls have do you? Then they were all


Me and the fellas were perplexed as fukk I had a full set of encyclopedias at home i knew one of them had the anatomy of the human body. I told the brehs I would figure it out.

Came back to school the next day hype as fukk. We were going to son the fukk out of those chicks.

Told the fellas that the womens private parts are called the urethra. We called them ho's urethra heads the whole school year.

4. I thought that if you had no money all you had to do was write a check. Asked my mom for a toy and she said she had no money for it. I said write a check.

Urethra heads....

The same thing you believed with a check, i believed with a credit card.