deal breakers with single parents..

mamba

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Kids grow up and eventually, while they will always be there, they won't need that constant support...they will become more independent. Yes, the guy would definitely have to be bringing a LOT of other things to the table...but if you're with someone where you see long term/marriage being an option, then you stick it out. I don't view it as "settling" if you're genuinely happy...I'll always choose to be with whomever makes me happy in the end.

Once you're over 30 and peering over the cliff, you aren't doing the choosing anymore my dear. You get chosen.
 

mamba

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No kids because I haven't been married. Not necessarily scared. I know quite a bit of women in their mid 30's who haven't had problems getting pregnant. There are risks as you get older, yes, but if you for sure know you want to have a child and aren't ready, you can get your eggs frozen (one of my girlfriends did that)...just saying that because it is an option...

What type of men did you date in your 20s? Any marriageable men?
 

Desirous

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Once you're over 30 and peering over the cliff, you aren't doing the choosing anymore my dear. You get chosen.
I follow my heart...even though sometimes it hasn't been the most rational decision (we can all relate to that), but if I was going to "settle" I would have and I can settle...there are lots of options even for an old woman like me.
 

MikelArteta

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I follow my heart...even though sometimes it hasn't been the most rational decision (we can all relate to that), but if I was going to "settle" I would have and I can settle...there are lots of options even for an old woman like me.

if you were a single mom at 31 how great do you think you optiosn would be?
 

Desirous

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Anyway, I'm not here to change anyone's mind...I'm just speaking about my experiences and opinions. You guys do what's good for you.
 

supanegro

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No kids because I haven't been married. Not necessarily scared. I know quite a bit of women in their mid 30's who haven't had problems getting pregnant. There are risks as you get older, yes, but if you for sure know you want to have a child and aren't ready, you can get your eggs frozen (one of my girlfriends did that)...just saying that because it is an option...

Tell ur friend to work out something wit me n defrost them eggs...planned single parenthood is the best relationship nowadays it seems...
 

Desirous

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if you were a single mom at 31 how great do you think you optiosn would be?
Dunno - I'm not in that position so I don't worry / think about it just like you probably don't wonder how great your options would be if you had a handicap or something lol we shouldn't worry about things until we face them (unless it's taking preventative measures to avoid them/not being reckless).
 

mamba

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I follow my heart...even though sometimes it hasn't been the most rational decision (we can all relate to that), but if I was going to "settle" I would have and I can settle...there are lots of options even for an old woman like me.

Not really. Once you're above a certain age, that Disney stuff gets tossed in the bushes. We're talking about real life my dear.

An older woman has to start thinking strategically, as the options aren't as numerous as when she was 18-26.

Are you saying you have more options, now, than you did at 25? I'm talking real options, not simps on Instagram, Facebook and other social media who just want to smash and dash? I'm talking about real options who want to court you and ultimately make you their wife?
 

Desirous

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Not really. Once you're above a certain age, that Disney stuff gets tossed in the bushes. We're talking about real life my dear.

An older woman has to start thinking strategically, as the options aren't as numerous as when she was 18-26.

Are you saying you have more options, now, than you did at 25?
I'm saying that I don't judge people or deem them as less desirable if they have had a divorce or have a child. I know people who married their "top option" in their early 20s and now that they're 30, they are divorced. We all aim to "get it right" the first time, but if we're talking about "real life" and not "Disney stuff" then that is the reality: it's not uncommon for people who marry at a young age to grow apart once they reach their 30s.
 

MikelArteta

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Tell ur friend to work out something wit me n defrost them eggs...planned single parenthood is the best relationship nowadays it seems...

i honestly think in the next ten to 15 years hell maybe 5, folks will just choose the type of women they want pay like 15-20k for her to carry the baby to term and then take the reigns from there :manny:
 

MikelArteta

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Goatganda the pearl of Africa
I'm saying that I don't judge people or deem them as less desirable if they have had a divorce or have a child. I know people who married their "top option" in their early 20s and now that they're 30, they are divorced. We all aim to "get it right" the first time, but if we're talking about "real life" and not "Disney stuff" then that is the reality: it's not uncommon for people who marry at a young age to grow apart once they reach their 30s.

average first marriage lasts 7 years :lupe:

the earlier you marry more likely you will get divorce
 

Desirous

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average first marriage lasts 7 years :lupe:

the earlier you marry more likely you will get divorce

There's a big difference from 23 to 30...if you look back at how you were 7 years ago, you probably have matured a lot during that span...and your views on different subject matters have changed...people don't always grow in the same direction. That's not to say that you don't continue to mature and grow after 30, because you do, but I don't think it's as drastic as in your early 20s when you're really starting to come into your own.
 
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