Do ain't **** women always say they were molested for attention?

[Turbulent]

i'm on the OP's side on this one. I see what he's talking about. I'll say this. A girl that barely knows you, who you can definitely tell is attracted to you and right away tells you about her life problems (bad exes, molestation, daddy issues, life struggles, health issues, etc) is definitely a red flag. She's fishing for sympathy/attention on some level (even if she is sincere). The simps will get abused by her and the wolves will eat off her...

 

[Smokebreak]

Almost every hispanic/latin chick ive ever known or dealt with has been molested..they always telling me stories. Dominican Mexican it doesn't matter. It always be their cousins or uncles.


Whats wrong w hispanic dudes yall?

 

[Bay Area]

I don't deny that it's real and I'm sure it's very traumatic. Did you even read my post? I didn't say anything about reporting it but I just can't picture somebody who was that psychologically damaged just flat out telling everybody they first meet and using it for attention as well as an excuse.

I don't think ya read the nikka OP.

I did read it, I expanded further than you wanted to hear. Some peoples coping mechanisms is to be "too honest" too fast about there personally life. Thats actually a sign that something truly DID happen to them. Whether you want to date someone like that is your choice but its foolish to assume they are lying.

 

[sanityovar8ted]

:l

 

[YouLoveMe]

:l

Come tell us your story....

 

[Greenstrings]

But this subject to just come up with someone you just met.

Let think about the motivation that would lead a woman to
disclose something so traumatic and personal such as this...

Maybe I'm too old school or something, but I think she would
have an agenda for that guy to fix her and that to me is bad
business and it could lead to something far worse than the
molestation like heartbreak.

People, in general, can't handle their own problems, so it's a
must we take on someone else's? I'm not trying to be callous
or unsympathetic. I'm just looking at the common sense factor
of this situation.

Your well within your rights to think what you do about such a scenario as long as you're willing to identify the cynicism within your own thought process because there's no straightforward common sense in dealing with shyt like this.

If the subtext of all this is encounters with a view towards some kind of sexual relationship (which it clearly is) is it really that unreasonable for a girl to let a guy know about such an experience?

Does there have to be an agenda? Of course there may be, but could she not just be forewarning a guy who might not want deal with all that baggage? Your way of looking at this is perfectly valid so long as your not presuming that it's the only viable option.

And are you seriously implying that heartbreak is far worse than molestation?

I agree that a sense of personal responsibility is important and people must first look to themselves for acceptance, assurance and validation but human beings are social animals. And the extents to which we are receptive and understanding of individual trauma is a reflection of how much we value each other.

You may not mean to but you're endorsing a hush hush culture that lets abusers off the hook and encourages victims to suffer in silence.

 

[sanityovar8ted]

Come tell us your story....

No story this time, just my point of view. I think some women use it as a crutch sometimes as an excuse to behave recklessly. I used to use it as my excuse to do drugs. After some counseling tho I learned it was more to it than that. Some victims of molestation don't openly admit to such out of fear, for being seen as damaged. Me personally when IM open about being a victim , it's more of a getting a person to understand my point of view.I didn't tell my husband for yrs after we finally decided we was gone make a commitment to one another. I don't think you can trust a victim who uses it as an excuse to love recklessly and not seek help.

 

[BedRoomI'z]

Your well within your rights to think what you do about such a scenario as long as you're willing to identify the cynicism within your own thought process because there's no straightforward common sense in dealing with shyt like this.

If the subtext of all this is encounters with a view towards some kind of sexual relationship (which it clearly is) is it really that unreasonable for a girl to let a guy know about such an experience?

Does there have to be an agenda? Of course there may be, but could she not just be forewarning a guy who might not want deal with all that baggage? Your way of looking at this is perfectly valid so long as your not presuming that it's the only viable option.

And are you seriously implying that heartbreak is far worse than molestation?

I agree that a sense of personal responsibility is important and people must first look to themselves for acceptance, assurance and validation but human beings are social animals. And the extents to which we are receptive and understanding of individual trauma is a reflection of how much we value each other.

You may not mean to but you're endorsing a hush hush culture that lets abusers off the hook and encourages victims to suffer in silence.

Cynicism to you, because I take a firmer stance on the subject matter?
That's cool for you to believe, because like you say we are well within
our right to feel how we want to feel about this. The specifics are subjective.

Rest to sure, I would not speak on something I have no knowledge of and just pull shyt out the sky, for the hell of it.
The reason why I implied that heartbreak might be worse is because this person is already fragile to begin with, and looking to discuss a past trauma
like molestation with a person she just met may do more harm than good.
That's the thing that gets me, we so open nowadays

I was taught to keep some stuff like this or anything truly of a personal nature to yourself or talk to the right
avenue of people.

And, if you gathered from my posts that I am encouraging the ones who
are doing these horrible deeds to them, you may need a little more clarification on the subject matter.

I just say don't talk about the shyt to everybody you meet.

 

[sanityovar8ted]

Cynicism to you, because I take a firmer stance on the subject matter?
That's cool for you to believe, because like you say we are well within
our right to feel how we want to feel about this. The specifics are subjective.

Rest to sure, I would not speak on something I have no knowledge of and just pull shyt out the sky, for the hell of it. The reason why I implied that heartbreak might be worse is because this person is already fragile to begin with, and looking to discuss her past with a person she just met may do
more harm than good. That's the thing that gets me, we so open nowadays I was taught to keep some stuff like
or anything truly of a personal nature to yourself or talk to the right
avenue of people.

And, if you gathered from my posts that I am encouraging the ones who
are doing the horrible deeds to them, you may need a little more clarification on the subject matter.

I just say don't talk about the shyt to everybody you meet.

on here I just don't give a fukk and don't care who knows it cuz some of the shyt I say is off the wall.so u mfs get to know me and why I think the way I do. But u mfs ain't gone never meet me so it's like I still have some anonymity.

 

[BedRoomI'z]

on here I just don't give a fukk and don't care who knows it cuz some of the shyt I say is off the wall.so u mfs get to know me and why I think the way I do. But u mfs ain't gone never meet me so it's like I still have some anonymity.

Noone is judging you or whatever you went through in your past, especially
me, let's make that first and foremost.

Say what you feel, this is what this board is for, we don't all have to agree.
As long as what the next person may say or do doesn't take away from
your growth as person, then that's all that really matter.

 

[TLR Is Mental Poison]

This nikka chillin at truck stops and foster homes

Like thats the wave

 

[Seea]

ahh i've met a few girls like this, they always feel the need to confess it, and then they use it as an excuse for their crazy actions. Most (not all), but most of these girls are damaged goods, and im not a fukking psychologist.

This concept escapes me whenever it comes up. There isn't anyone on Earth who hasn't been affected by something. What makes survivors of rape and molestation "damaged" but no one else?

 

[Blackking]

I just pretend like I didn't hear them say it. I hit and move on. It would be impossible to fix those mental scars.

 

[Black]

:l

Who hurt you?

 

[Still Benefited]

Back in hhighschool I had a speech class and this girl got up there,fine as hell by the way......she got enough attention as it wuz....she went up front to tell her speech and told us all how she had been raped when she wuz younger and how it caused her to be really angry and bitter but she found god and is doin better now,and she wuz real emotional and had us all ...bcuz nobody knew before that,after it wuz over everybody went up to her consoling her telling her we wuz sorry about that happening to her just showing her a lot of luv and support not on no tryna smash shyt like we normally wuz.....next thing we all know over the next few weeks suddenly a bunch of chicks confessing around the school they got raped too...almost as if they wanted the love and attention she got and they wuz tryna steal her moment away.


Now sum of y'all gon say "maybe she just inspired those other girls to come out and talk about it"....well that's great but if all u doin is tellin us and not going to the police station to tell who did it,excuse me if I think the timing and intentions wuz a little suspect on they part....it just looked like alotta bad acting goin on on sum of them girls parts.