Don't take a shyt and do squats right after....

[hypo666]

Had to take a sick leave from work, as yesterday I was in the gym and before I started my leg workout I decided to take a shyt. I did squats and felt a sharp pain in my a$$hole area ,I carried on my workout,by the time I was down I had pain in my a$$hole and lower back area. In the shower I put in my hand in my buttcrack and felt a rock hard lump stuck to my a$$hole.

I left the gym and I was actually limping,the pain was that bad. I went to the doctors (the blessed National health service ,I pay my taxes for ), and got an emergency appointment. Because I noticed I was almost pissing my pants when i went to pee. Didn't know what the fukk was wrong. Doctor examined me, and it was very painful by the way and basically I have a haemoorhoid that has got a blood clot in it and it's so big that is also putting pressure on my prostate , probably the pressure from squats did it after taking a shyt irritated my a$$hole . He told me I have two options,wait up to 7 days for the fukking thing to shrink back naturally, or go to hospital and have some fukked up thing done,that will be 'uncomfortable' (doctors speak for extremely painful in my experience) but will sort it quicker.

I decided tobe a p*ssy and am now lying on my stomach in a scene similar to the one in american history X after that guy got assraped. Plus the fukking cream he gave me stains my underwear.

 

[Jesus Is Lord]

I'm sorry for your loss breh.

 

[Food Mane]

 

[HoustonHeat]

Have your butt hole violated by lack of fiber, brehs.
Regular folks shyt and squat just fine.

 

[Spliff]

Gyat damn breh up that fiber andn water intake. And stop pushing hard when shytting

 

[hypo666]

Have your butt hole violated by lack of fiber, brehs.
Regular folks shyt and squat just fine.

Doctor said my diet was fine, first thing he mentioned as a possible culprit was the diet and lack of fiber, when I mentioned what I consume a day he ruled that out.

Nah it was basically from taking a massive shyt in the gym toilets and then doing squats. I dunno about you guys but my ass has grown big time from all my squats and other leg training, and it takes a shyt ton of toilet paper to clean it up which probably also irritated things back there , fukk knows what kim kardashians booty hole must look like bets it's as red as a baboons butt. You can see how it happened though, a$$hole was already a bit slack from taking a massive shyt and then I squated some heavy ass weight ATG , probably lucky my a$$hole didn't prolapse.

Tell you what it feels kind of weird to have tolie in bed with my ass in the air all day. I can't go to work as I am on my feet all shift virtually and I can hardly stand right now,Iam dreading needing to take a shyt this thing is almost covering my entire a$$hole.

 

[HoustonHeat]

@hypo666

I am utterly disgusted, kindly stop venting.
Big booty women don't even have these hemorrhoid issues like that, man.
Why are you rubbing your butthole so vigorously? This is not normal, please get a hold of it.

 

[The ADD]

No chance I'm squating with one in the chamber.

Plus if you need that much paper up that fiber and water like @Spliff mentioned

 

[semtex]

Doctor said my diet was fine, first thing he mentioned as a possible culprit was the diet and lack of fiber, when I mentioned what I consume a day he ruled that out.

Nah it was basically from taking a massive shyt in the gym toilets and then doing squats. I dunno about you guys but my ass has grown big time from all my squats and other leg training, and it takes a shyt ton of toilet paper to clean it up which probably also irritated things back there , fukk knows what kim kardashians booty hole must look like bets it's as red as a baboons butt. You can see how it happened though, a$$hole was already a bit slack from taking a massive shyt and then I squated some heavy ass weight ATG , probably lucky my a$$hole didn't prolapse.

Tell you what it feels kind of weird to have tolie in bed with my ass in the air all day. I can't go to work as I am on my feet all shift virtually and I can hardly stand right now,Iam dreading needing to take a shyt this thing is almost covering my entire a$$hole.

 

[hypo666]

@hypo666

I am utterly disgusted, kindly stop venting.
Big booty women don't even have these hemorrhoid issues like that, man.
Why are you rubbing your butthole so vigorously? This is not normal, please get a hold of it.

Sorry bro but Iam kind of bored right now, having to lie all day on my belly propped up on a pillow waiting for this thing to shrink down. My girlfriend is downstairs with her kid ,and just said I look fukking gay and took a pic then left the room , I get zero sympathy. she said she would make me some dinner but that was on hour ago. I was rubbing my butthole so much because Iam really hairy down there.

 

[AJW]

 

[Heelish]

Sorry bro but Iam kind of bored right now, having to lie all day on my belly propped up on a pillow waiting for this thing to shrink down. My girlfriend is downstairs with her kid ,and just said I look fukking gay and took a pic then left the room , I get zero sympathy. she said she would make me some dinner but that was on hour ago. I was rubbing my butthole so much because Iam really hairy down there.

 

[Adam3000]

Thread exceeded all expectations

 

[hazardous]

Sorry bro but Iam kind of bored right now, having to lie all day on my belly propped up on a pillow waiting for this thing to shrink down. My girlfriend is downstairs with her kid ,and just said I look fukking gay and took a pic then left the room , I get zero sympathy. she said she would make me some dinner but that was on hour ago. I was rubbing my butthole so much because Iam really hairy down there.

 

[kp404]

:kobedeadagain: