Girl at my job asked me why so many men have zero interest in a relationship

[kevm3]

Well it's the truth. what benefit is there for most men in a relationship? More than anything, it's just additional stipulations that you have to worry about. You're the one that will have to go on all these dates, pay for this and that, etc., all for something she is giving to a guy who doe

There are a rare few women who bring something to the table in a relationship, and if you happen to have one of those, consider yourself very blessed.

A lot of women keep complaining over and over about the lack of commitment, but they don't want to hear the truth and don't want to hear about anything to fix the problem. They want to keep living in that fantasy world where they can just show up, look pretty, 'have their fun' and in their late 30s, just have some guy show up and take care of them, pay their bills, etc., while having to give nothing in return. Sorry, doesn't work like that. If these women want to be in a relationship, they will have to start preserving themselves and they will have to start bringing something to the table.

 

[Ezekiel 25:17]

Look we gonna smash regardless just cuz. But it's like u really have to go out of your way to find the quality ones that might be worth a future with.

Problem is they all following the same playbook. They dress the same, talk the same, dance the same, live the same mantra hot girl summer eat pray love etc it's like u rly have to spend time to figure out who's who.

As a successful lone wolf it's like why bother? Somewhere along the way the game changed. And we're supposed to act like it's cool and still look for a wife like the old days like the girls aren't completely different today.

Half these women don't even know what they want. They just wanna have fun so it's like ok I'm having fun too...now they mad lol

Your first mistake is going out to find them. I'm lazy, so ain't going nowhere Secondly if they all act the same, dress the same, etc. That just makes your decision easy

Me personally I don't care. Too busy trying to get money, buy cars, and travel. shyt, I might find me an African woman

 

[Commish]

this is the truth breh
The average chick is talking to tons of men, you'll text and not get a reply back till the next day when you know these chicks are on their phones 24/7. You'll do the grunt work and just get a lol or a kk back You'll get a date and your spending your money and your time and things seem to be going well then poof radio silence. You're just a demar while they looking for their kawhi.

I don't even think i'm talking to one girl I was talking to 2 months ago, and 2 months from now it'll prob be the same ish. And you're right your doing all this ish as a man, many of these chicks if you don't message or call first you'll never even hear from them, you gotta contact em, you gotta take em out, you gotta pay and then you gotta hope you get another date or shot, and then if you do become exclusive you gotta do this and that ad if you slip a little uh oh ish is like taking a 3 year old to the county fair you can never get to comfortable.

I refuse to be a simp at a chicks beck and call, and nikkaz are so thirsty and pathetic that obese chicks, chicks with kids, chicks working for 7 dollars a hour, ugly ass chicks with rotted brown teeth have more nikkz chasing em than a 5 star athlete has d1 colleges after him

We all go through it, but some more so than others. Like men, women have a pecking order on who gets their attention.

Some women will treat some men better or worse than others, but if they happen to get played, then it is ALL MENS fault!

Men do the same thing...

They may do some things for certain women that they would not do for other women. If said man get played, then ALL WOMEN ain't shyt! They ALL HOES, etc..

So, what happens is that people become narcissists and bring that bullshyt into the dating realm. Unfortunately, they unleash their bs on those who are genuinely good people.

End result..

Hurt people end up hurting people who in turn hurts people who hurt people...

The cycle continues and society becomes sicker and sicker..

 

[Youseenmywork]

...And let's all stop acting like the nikka the women has to come and blow her back isnt getting the best VERSION of her. You just have to know how to get this info out of her once y'all meet for a "date".

 

[Lord_nikon]

because most woman bytch and moan about little shyt, most want the perfect guy .

 

[Ohene]

The gesture is appreciated and returned back to ya! I appreciate you understanding my POV..

Relationships is a two way street! It starts from the 1st date! But, at the same token, not all dates are meant to go further than that initial date.

People have to establish rapport in order for anything to manifest into something meaningful.

Unfortunately, it seems like people approach dating and relationships like they did in high school.

Nah, this is grown folks land now! Gotta step it up, if you want something good out of it.

That getting something for nothing, on either side is for the birds! If you love and value yourself, then you would not settle for anything less!

i had this same problem my g. about a two months into dating, enough of a time for me to feel like i courted enough i told my now gf the same thing
it wasnt easy but she finally took it in and its been great since.

i noticed that she was having commitment anxiety and i theorized that (beyond her daddy issues) it likely stemmed from her not investing much into the relationship. when youre being courted its easy to keep things going and string that shyt along...but if youre the one planning dates, initiating all the contact, paying for everything, and doing all the kind / thoughtful gestures then youre gonna be much more invested and not want it all to be for nothing.

i dont expect a girl to ever be on my level when it comes to that because I'm naturally just a very forthcoming/thoughtful person, but I also aint a chump. Shorty pulling her weight now and its great. early...but great

 

[Youseenmywork]

Hell even my mentor sent me this . If this is going with white people with dating and marriage then you can just imagine what is truly going between black men and black women

The future of men and marriage is bleak

 

[TaxCollector13459]

OP..

You may not like my answer to your response to your coworker, but based on your response, those particular dudes aren't mature!

What I could respect is your coworker's date being upfront about his intentions. That gave your coworker and option to either continue dealing with him or moving on..

Obviously, if she is interested in a relationship, then the date she had with that dude should be a one and done deal!

As for your answer to her query, immature men may use women having sex on the first dates as a reason for not pursing relationships.

As for the rest of men, there is no single reason why some men don't want a relationship.

Speaking for myself, I am all in with getting into a relationship, but it can't be a one sided affair during a courtship!

What I have experienced within current times is some women wanting men to adhere to traditional roles right away w/o doing their part in adhering to the same traditional roles.

In addition, it seems to me that some women, not all, but some women or the ones I have ran into really don't want to do shyt!

They don't ask questions. They don't engage in conversations. They don't show any enthusiasm when it comes to becoming better acquainted.

It feels as if I am auditioning for a spot on their roster where they are the judge and I am to perform or audition for them and based on my performance, they will decide whether they are going to put forth any effort or not.

In the meantime, I need to take them out to dinner, open doors, give gifts, make all phone calls and texts, etc.

How is the aforementioned appealing to me? It's one thing to take the first step or initiative pursuing someone and another thing to do all the work with little to no return..

So, perhaps for some men, women's behavior and expectations on dates is what is turning some men off when it comes to relationships because said men don't see any value in relationships with certain women.

But, if women step their game up, be active in the dating process, establish a connection with men, then there will be more men willing to get into relationships.

In all, all parties involved need to be happy and receive benefits. Not just the woman or man.

end thread

 

[MajesticLion]

dudes just be repeating shyte from the same playbook shorty shouldn't feel no type of way about it*

What then, when her own playbook dictates that she should? That the response - let's assume here that the OP is a stand-up guy whose opinion she respects and takes seriously - must mean that she's somehow flawed and her self-esteemed is now forever tarnished?

 

[SupaHotIce]

Smh if you really said that

 

[TaxCollector13459]

A lot of women don't realize how trash they are, especially these days. I have some female acquaintances that have the same question... And these chicks are usually not relationship material at all. The type that would put any poor sucker they meet through the ringer. The types that be all in the clubs every weekend in everybody's face, twerking on their insta videos and Snapchats and expecting men to bring everything to the table and entertain them. It's ridiculous.

 

[Lord Bison]

The real reason is because traditional dating and monogamous relationships are dead now. Women will date a man but secretly keep an eye out for the next best thing because women have an unlimited number of options compared to before thanks to social media.

Women have no incentive to commit to one guy for a long period of time because she believes her Mr. Perfect is just one DM away. At best the modern day woman just uses men for attention and entertainment until the next best thing shows up and then will self sabotage the relationship and she's out.

Men have started to peep game and realize that the juice isnt worth the squeeze and we just get what we want and we good. Men just see dating and women as a waste of time and money in 2019 and we adapted to the times.

It is what it is

 

[010101]

What then, when her own playbook dictates that she should? That the response - let's assume here that the OP is a stand-up guy whose opinion she respects and takes seriously - must mean that she's somehow flawed and her self-esteemed is now forever tarnished?

both sides are in the wrong

it's hard for men & women

it's just two halves dealing with living individuals like stagnant things that have operating manuals ha

*

 

[TaxCollector13459]

The real reason is because traditional dating and monogamous relationships are dead now. Women will date a man but secretly keep an eye out for the next best thing because women have an unlimited number of options compared to before thanks to social media.

Women have no incentive to commit to one guy for a long period of time because she believes her Mr. Perfect is just one DM away. At best the modern day woman just uses men for attention and entertainment until the next best thing shows up and then will self sabotage the relationship and she's out.

Men have started to peep game and realize that the juice isnt worth the squeeze and we just get what we want and we good. Men just see dating and women as a waste of time and money in 2019 and we adapted to the times.

It is what it is

100it

 

[Keep_It_Hip_Hop_Fam]

Because relationships don't populate the earth