How the hell do grown people make friends?

the bossman

Superstar
Joined
Sep 4, 2012
Messages
12,051
Reputation
2,760
Daps
57,045
Reppin
Norfeast D.C.
You have to put yourself out there. No other way around it. America has a very anti-social culture once you graduate from school. You will have to make a genuine effort even when folks might not seem receptive off-rip

1. join a sports league (e.g. flag football league, bball, etc.) You end up seeing these folks every week and normally will end up at some type of bar after the game

2. take some dance classes. I actually met a few cool people going consistently. Try kizomba. it's a partner dance that originated from angola in Africa and you will most likely be outnumbered by women. If you can actually get good at it, then you will :eat:

3. do random meet ups on shyt that you are actually interested in (language learning, dancing, running, etc.)

4. gym

5. after you start making a few friends, become the dude who organizes/hosts events. these people will start bring their friends and after 2 or 3 times you now have a full fledge social circle. you'll be known as the dude who knows all these people hosting parties and shyt.
 

dora_da_destroyer

Master Baker
Joined
May 1, 2012
Messages
66,664
Reputation
17,220
Daps
274,932
Reppin
Oakland
- co workers

- when I moved cross country, I had a few friends in dc already, started hanging with their friends and stole some

- joined my alumni club

- made two friends off of Craigslist :heh:

- join clubs, activities, meet ups - professional clubs, rec activities, the gym (if you go to a smaller independent facility - I've made good friends at my gym), poker club, frat/sorority, civic engagement, family dinner, book club etc

- ask people if they know people in the city you're moving to and have them connect you

- hitting up the bar alone, pretty much every time I sit in the bar area of a restaurant alone I meet someone, about 1/4 of those could actually become acquaintances if I cared to make it that


Edit: neighbors, especially if you live in a big apartment complex

You probably won't find new BFF's as an adult, but it's pretty easy to find people you can at least count on to hang with or do social things together.
 

GodsPerspective

Superstar
Joined
Jan 26, 2015
Messages
3,378
Reputation
955
Daps
13,132
Are you interested in sports? Join a rec team and ask your teammates for a beer after practices/games

Are you interested in music? Go to your local music bars and mingle with people who have similar music tastes to yourself.

Are you interested in tech? Go to conventions in your city and strike up convos with folks you see that are looking at interesting new devices.

With interest in any activity, there is always a group of people with similar interests, and I can guarantee a group has been formed.
If you notice, for each event you go to I always mention YOU STEPPING UP AND ASKING TO HANG.
People often wait until others invite/ask. But you have to put yourself out there. It's similar to approaching a girl, but much easier because it's a group and not a one on one thing.
Practice practice practice! It'll come like second nature to you eventually.
 

Doin2Much Williams

Grace Under Fiyah
Supporter
Joined
May 18, 2012
Messages
14,376
Reputation
4,169
Daps
28,467
Reppin
Insignificant posting from an insignificant poster
Inability to create adult relationships is a social deviancy.



It's actually a fukkin weird concept to me to be frank.



We're social creatures yet you can't open your mouth, turn on your phone and exchange contact info and meet up to do activities?



Excuses lamer than Drake's outfits and Trump's tans.





.
 

dora_da_destroyer

Master Baker
Joined
May 1, 2012
Messages
66,664
Reputation
17,220
Daps
274,932
Reppin
Oakland
What gym y'all go to?

Everybody including me is rocking headphones in that piece and doing their own thing.
Even before going to a small facility, I made friends at the gym 1) because I kept a concrete schedule and started seeing the same people all the time 2) group classes, again, you see each other all the time, have time to chat before after class, you're in an environment where people usually are supportive of each other so you already have a common ground of "being invested" in them at least from a fitness standpoint
 

ozzy

Pro
Joined
Oct 31, 2017
Messages
737
Reputation
-270
Daps
1,647
Does everybody just talk to people they meet in highschool or childhood? I don't know how adults make friends, it's so difficult. I plan on moving soon and I have to start all over. How does a adult make friends? Help me out

Well first of all join club activitie like what do you enjoy do. Go places that there is alot of people like clubs, gym, chariy events. Some time even when walking you can find interest things to talk with people around you. Just search for types of club near you
 

Iceson Beckford

Rich In Spirit.
Joined
Aug 12, 2017
Messages
6,488
Reputation
4,896
Daps
39,079
Reppin
Dunya
This scares tf out of me.

You mean when Im older Im going to have to be friends with Co workers??:gucci:

At school shyt is so easy so the thought of having to do this is depressing asf :scust:
 
Top