Just so that you brehs can save your didn't read memes, here is the short version: This was probably the most functional relationship i've been in, how do I have a functional break up 
For those interested in the long version, feel free to proceed:
My girl dumped me on new years eve
. I'm not mad, I was caught up in shyt at work and neglected her, long distance relationships don't work like that. She wasn't mad either, she just said she couldn't deal with my monosylabic expression of emotions anymore, and realized the spark was gone when she saw me (classic emotional withdrawal if you ask me).
Anyways, I'm a bit flustered as to what the protocol is now. Normally, woman fukk up in some way or another, I give them the 
and completely remove them from my life. I'm a firm believer in not taking your ex back or even dealing with them at all. Obviously, this works better when you feel like the other party is at fault. Unfortunately, I can't say that that's the case 
She really was a good girl, who put a lot of effort in our relationship, and didn't get the same effort in return from me 
.
Anyways, she did some confusing woman shyt, and I don't know how to react. She told me not to simp after her (
) because that wouldn't work. She had to see for herself if the emotions came back (what makes you think I'll wait around until you find out 
).
Then, after she left, she send me a text saying she wasn't going to drive the four hours back home, because it was late, and would instead celebrate at a girlfriends house an hour from where I live. She ended the text with a kissing smiley. A couple of hours later, she texted me again, telling me that the party at her friends house was boring. Then she asked if I was going to the party we had planned to go to. I told her nah, I'm halfway through my liquor collection and will probably pass out at home. Later that night, she texted me again, asking if everything was ok. I had passed out at that point, so I didn't reply. She texted me again the next morning, asking if everything was okay, because she was worried about me getting drunk by myself. Then she told me about the boring party again. Halfway through the conversation, I fell asleep because I was still hungover. When I woke up again, I didn't really feel like continuing to make small talk, so I didn't reply.
Anyways, I feel manipulated. Why would you text me after you broke up with me. Is this some old woman "If you truly love me, you'll fight for me and ask me to come back" shyt, despite her telling me not to simp? Is it normal to keep in touch if you break up a nondysfunctional relationship? I'm really not about that simp life, and I don't believe in staying friends with your ex. On the other hand, since I'm the one that messed things up, I feel bad about giving her the
treatment. What do I do, brehs and brehettes?
For those interested in the long version, feel free to proceed:
My girl dumped me on new years eve
. I'm not mad, I was caught up in shyt at work and neglected her, long distance relationships don't work like that. She wasn't mad either, she just said she couldn't deal with my monosylabic expression of emotions anymore, and realized the spark was gone when she saw me (classic emotional withdrawal if you ask me).Anyways, I'm a bit flustered as to what the protocol is now
. Normally, woman fukk up in some way or another, I give them the and completely remove them from my life. I'm a firm believer in not taking your ex back or even dealing with them at all. Obviously, this works better when you feel like the other party is at fault. Unfortunately, I can't say that that's the case She really was a good girl, who put a lot of effort in our relationship, and didn't get the same effort in return from me .Anyways, she did some confusing woman shyt, and I don't know how to react. She told me not to simp after her (
) because that wouldn't work. She had to see for herself if the emotions came back (what makes you think I'll wait around until you find out ). Then, after she left, she send me a text saying she wasn't going to drive the four hours back home, because it was late, and would instead celebrate at a girlfriends house an hour from where I live. She ended the text with a kissing smiley. A couple of hours later, she texted me again, telling me that the party at her friends house was boring. Then she asked if I was going to the party we had planned to go to. I told her nah, I'm halfway through my liquor collection and will probably pass out at home
. Later that night, she texted me again, asking if everything was ok. I had passed out at that point, so I didn't reply. She texted me again the next morning, asking if everything was okay, because she was worried about me getting drunk by myself. Then she told me about the boring party again. Halfway through the conversation, I fell asleep because I was still hungover. When I woke up again, I didn't really feel like continuing to make small talk, so I didn't reply.Anyways, I feel manipulated. Why would you text me after you broke up with me. Is this some old woman "If you truly love me, you'll fight for me and ask me to come back" shyt, despite her telling me not to simp? Is it normal to keep in touch if you break up a nondysfunctional relationship? I'm really not about that simp life, and I don't believe in staying friends with your ex. On the other hand, since I'm the one that messed things up, I feel bad about giving her the
treatment. What do I do, brehs and brehettes?
Bruh