Mandarin Duck
Majestic and Highfalutin
I been having some real issues over the past year despite my career doing well. My life outside of work is spiraling out of control.
I've had panic attacks.
Anxiety.
Depression.
And antisocial to a fault.
I would see people I've known for years and act like I didn't know them.
Flat out ignore people while they're trying to talk to me.
Instead of focusing on my problems I been doing drugs to cope.
Weed was my drug of choice, but over the past 3 months I've been consistently doing coke along with smoking weed.
I eventually got to a point where I didn't even want weed anymore. Only coke.
I would wake up, go to work, come home, do coke all night, sleep for 45 mins and get up to do it all over again the next day.
I tried to get ahold of my dealer a few days ago and he wasn't picking up.
So I was in my house with no coke and I felt useless.
If it wasn't for me being forced to be sober that night I wouldn't have realized how fukked up my mind has been for a while.
At first I thought I would just stop coke and keep smoking weed. But I think I really need some time to get completely sober and try and find some real happiness out of life.
I been calling some therapist and I plan on seeing one very soon.
If anybody else is going through some shyt and using anything as a coping mechanism please take some time out to look in the mirror and change what you do have control over.
TL:DR
I'm a snorter and I'm tryna do better.
I've had panic attacks.
Anxiety.
Depression.
And antisocial to a fault.
I would see people I've known for years and act like I didn't know them.
Flat out ignore people while they're trying to talk to me.
Instead of focusing on my problems I been doing drugs to cope.
Weed was my drug of choice, but over the past 3 months I've been consistently doing coke along with smoking weed.
I eventually got to a point where I didn't even want weed anymore. Only coke.
I would wake up, go to work, come home, do coke all night, sleep for 45 mins and get up to do it all over again the next day.
I tried to get ahold of my dealer a few days ago and he wasn't picking up.
So I was in my house with no coke and I felt useless.
If it wasn't for me being forced to be sober that night I wouldn't have realized how fukked up my mind has been for a while.
At first I thought I would just stop coke and keep smoking weed. But I think I really need some time to get completely sober and try and find some real happiness out of life.
I been calling some therapist and I plan on seeing one very soon.
If anybody else is going through some shyt and using anything as a coping mechanism please take some time out to look in the mirror and change what you do have control over.
TL:DR
I'm a snorter and I'm tryna do better.
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to the vice should be supported. That first revelation is hard to come by before some catastrophic shyt goes down.