I've noticed a trend with black women.

[Black_Panther_JS]

"what people call love is just a chemical reaction that compels animals to breed. It hits hard then it slowly fades leaving you stranded in a failing marriage..."

 

[Neuromancer]

Oh, absolutely I believe thats why human civilizations started with certain gender roles in place. men were bigger and stronger and had to do the hunting, and the roles developed from that. dating and marriage sure was simpler back then. having a husband was literally ciritcal to your survival, so u played your intended role and got fed and financed.

living in a technologically based capitalist society has kind of made that line of thinking obsolete now. women are able to be on equal footing with men so to speak, and that has indoctrinated a whole new set of social problems.

(also, although your colloqualism sounded like something out of a Harry Potter book, I give u props for the creativity )

I think this is where we find issue. The practices we've participated in during game those 200 thousand years are now genetic markers. Our existence has been predicated by these things. And so trying to change things that have been bred in by nature will take a long time. And if shyt gets bad again (what with global warming and all the wars) we might still need those things we're trying to breed out. I get that if a woman does a job as good or better than a man she should be in. The same way compensated for it.

My first part asked did you think mating and courting should or would change with the social and economic changes?

 

[Emoryal]

A lot of words yet basically saying nothing. Impressive.

 

[Billie Jean]

I also don't like how we insult people who aren't bitter, scary a$$holes about love. Some people carry so much hurt that they try their best to make sure everybody else is hurt too.

I've had nikkas tell me I'm living in a gumdrop forest in Lala land because I believe in treating people well and doing good.

Like romance, love, ? You a simp, a sucka.

It's like we shame people for being decent human beings.

I wish I could rep you,sis.

Anytime you wanna to take a chance on love, you're naive. I would go as far as blaming it on anxiety and a lack of self confidence. Being scared of something before it has even happened

True naivety is dismissing the worth of true companionship.

 

[Mowgli]

I'm 32 pimp...

Married?

 

[Woman of god]

I think this is where we find issue. The practices we've participated in during game those 200 thousand years are now genetic markers. Our existence has been predicated by these things. And so trying to change things that have been bred in by nature will take a long time. And if shyt gets bad again (what with global warming and all the wars) we might still need those things we're trying to breed out. I get that if a woman does a job as good or better than a man she should be in. The same way compensated for it.

My first part asked did you think mating and courting should or would change with the social and economic changes?

i think its inevitable that mating and dating will change as our society and economy changes. theres nothing we can really do about that except change with it. marriage is in many ways a financial institution. many times finances drive our behaviors. a woman with 0 dollars and no job outside of the home is much more likely to have dinner waiting on the table and clothes washed, etc. because that is her job, her role. A woman with an entire career outside of the home will probably have much more difficulty completing those domestic tasks perhaps because of sheer fatigue or because she no longer feels its her place.

gender roles arent so black and white anymore, its a product of the times. we all will have to either get with it or get left behind. the more rights and roles women acquire, the more convoluted things will get

 

[Neuromancer]

i think its inevitable that mating and dating will change as our society and economy changes. theres nothing we can really do about that except change with it. marriage is in many ways a financial institution. many times finances drive our behaviors. a woman with 0 dollars and no job outside of the home is much more likely to have dinner waiting on the table and clothes washed, etc. because that is her job, her role. A woman with an entire career outside of the home will probably have much more difficulty completing those domestic tasks perhaps because of sheer fatigue or because she no longer feels its her place.

gender roles arent so black and white anymore, its a product of the times. we all will have to either get with it or get left behind. the more rights and roles women acquire, the more convoluted things will get

How do you see the rising divorce rates? Or the postulation that men who share domestic roles tend to get divorced at a higher rate. There was a thread on here about it.

 

[Da King]

I date a lot. Lately I've been hearing girls say they gave up on wanting a family or a normal relationship because of the people they're around.

This explains so much of why women don't crave romance anymore. They're basically men now. They want money and good jobs. They're learning to wear a poker face, it's kind of funny, and very sad. Women used be unrealistically beautiful. Now it's like 1 out 3 doesn't remind me of a dude. And maybe 2 out of 8 are gorgeous. Most girls are attractive so that's average.

I met this girl and I took her out on the spot. We walked and talked for two hours. It was lit. Anyway, she's a keeper. As many black women are. They are the best group of women to make mom's out of. That's another thread though.

I've noticed that women are so frightened of being played again, or winding up with nothing they take no risks. That's lame as fukk. Love is a fukking risk. If you want to play it safe you deserve to be as lonely as you are.

If you're not willing to potentially have your heart broken then you don't deserve it. If you're not willing to forgive, grow, and love some more you don't deserve it.

Love isn't practical. Marriage isn't practical. Having kids in this hateful world isn't practical. fukk money. The absence of love and passion in the world is what turns me off from having kids.

Im scared man. Men are not romantic. Men are also followers. Few men are leaders. They do whatever women are into and whatever other men are doing.

Women should inspire and encourage romance. Men will not. Sometimes I'll say to a girl you haven't had anyone love you. I'm talking really love you. They damn near cry sometimes.

Gentleman, please, let's date more and dog less. Girls are frightened of us at this point in the game and they're trying to play like we play and now nobody wants anything real, so we're all just lying to each other.

Fellow hopeless romantic

 

[Prynce]

I don't know where we headed forreal fam. I'm a young dude but I swear I'm more mature than a lot of cats out here. I don't play women. I don't have interest in being so kind of player. When I say I care about somebody it's not just words or lip service to get what I want. I wouldn't even waste my time trying to get to know somebody if my plan is just to fukk because I would rather jack off then be fake or jump through all them hoops.

I'm not scared to take a loss or be vulnerable with a woman. We got all these unwritten rules about being a man that I have no energy to follow. If I care about you then i'm not gonna act like I don't. I'm gonna treat you the best I can because I have no problem providing or protecting. If you want something and I love you then i'm gonna make it happen no questions asked. I don't have the energy or patience to show a certain amount of interest so you won't think i'm thirsty or play these calling/texting games or pretend a person not on my mind when they are on my mind. I'm not scared of getting played at all because life is way to short to be scared of somebody doing you dirty and I'm not afraid to take that L. Maybe i'm different because I really do have love for people when I say it and I don't say it on a whim but everybody don't want something that real because they too scared of being hurt. shyt a lonely feeling sometimes because people would rather be surface than to feel something deeply.

If dating got to be all these tricks and shyt then I rather just be alone my whole life. I don't need the shyt that bad if it comes with this much work. If I like you i'm gonna tell you and pursue you and I'm gonna be direct the whole time.
I guess that's the curse of being a hopeless romantic looking for something real in a generation where everybody scared

All I want to be is be a good man and treat the people I care about right. If that means i'm a simp then so be it because at least I can say I tried to be good in my actions. fukk being scared of being called a simp or some other lame shyt. I'm grown and nobody gonna whoop my ass for me being who I am.

I'm lukewarm about nothing

 

[JahFocus CS]

 

[Neuromancer]

I don't know where we headed forreal fam. I'm a young dude but I swear I'm more mature than a lot of cats out here. I don't play women. I don't have interest in being so kind of player. When I say I care about somebody it's not just words or lip service to get what I want. I wouldn't even waste my time trying to get to know somebody if my plan is just to fukk because I would rather jack off then be fake or jump through all them hoops.

I'm not scared to take a loss or be vulnerable with a woman. We got all these unwritten rules about being a man that I have no energy to follow. If I care about you then i'm not gonna act like I don't. I'm gonna treat you the best I can because I have no problem providing or protecting. If you want something and I love you then i'm gonna make it happen no questions asked. I don't have the energy or patience to show a certain amount of interest so you won't think i'm thirsty or play these calling/texting games or pretend a person not on my mind when they are on my mind. I'm not scared of getting played at all because life is way to short to be scared of somebody doing you dirty and I'm not afraid to take that L. Maybe i'm different because I really do have love for people when I say it and I don't say it on a whim but everybody don't want something that real because they too scared of being hurt. shyt a lonely feeling sometimes because people would rather be surface than to feel something deeply.

If dating got to be all these tricks and shyt then I rather just be alone my whole life. I don't need the shyt that bad if it comes with this much work. If I like you i'm gonna tell you and pursue you and I'm gonna be direct the whole time.
I guess that's the curse of being a hopeless romantic looking for something real in a generation where everybody scared

As a young cat, why do you feel the current climate is the way it is?

 

[the bossman]

Just ended it with a dude that was scared of being "played". Dude literally wanted a relationship but was willing to give nothing in return. Tried to talk it out multiple times and it was like talking to a wall. Nothing but justification. When I wanted to end it he really did not understand. He even said it was all a plot against him. I'm a little broken up about it but I can't do selfish.

What constituted as "giving something in return" to you that he wasn't willing to do?

 

[Prynce]

As a young cat, why do you feel the current climate is the way it is?

I think people forget that everything in life worth doing is hard including relationships. They so scared of being vulnerable or hurt that they would rather play these games with each other instead of being real. Everything about the turn up.

 

[Woman of god]

How do you see the rising divorce rates? Or the postulation that men who share domestic roles tend to get divorced at a higher rate. There was a thread on here about it.

from my observations (myself included) women want the good parts from both sides of the coin. we want the benefits afforded from this new age society (our own money, the right to an education, etc.), but we also want the benefits that come from the old society (men paying, holding the door for us, the guy doing the "mens" work). i think the best bet is to find someone u get along with and lay out the roles for you two. not worrying about whatever gender roles society says u should have, but define ur own roles within ur relationship.

when i was much younger my dad paid all the bills and my mom did all the housework. now she gives him money and he washes dishes sometimes. flexibility i suppose

 

[Neuromancer]

from my observations (myself included) women want the good parts from both sides of the coin. we want the benefits afforded from this new age society (our own money, the right to an education, etc.), but we also want the benefits that come from the old society (men paying, holding the door for us, the guy doing the "mens" work). i think the best bet is to find someone u get along with and lay out the roles for you two. not worrying about whatever gender roles society says u should have, but define ur own roles within ur relationship.

when i was much younger my dad paid all the bills and my mom did all the housework. now she gives him money and he washes dishes sometimes. flexibility i suppose

I agree. However I think we need to be realistic in finding someone who doesn't want both sides of the coin off rip. I've dealt with that in my single days. And I feel a lot more people feel entitled to things (both genders) based on what they feel they put out ( i.e money, time ect.)