1) Be not a Christian nor a Muslim...
2) Ask Durant where he is going to play next season.
3) He doesn't answer in a way that is controversial enough for you to generate shekels on your shytty clickbait site. so you keep asking him every day for months, if not years, the same question.
4) When he stops answering your other questions because he sees that his words mean nothing and you're just looking to hear something that is of benefit to you as a journalist, instead of him as a man, write articles slandering his silence. ("He can join whenever he wants, but silence is inferred as corroboration.")
5) When he doesn't care about your shekel inflow, begin to panic and write articles about what he should say to you, so you don't look foolish anymore ("I haven't made a decision yet and am focused 100% on this season.")
>we are here<
6) When he doesn't kowtow to your new demands, dig up a plant who will claim to be an ex girlfriend or closeted boyfriend that can allege that KD got handsy with you and threatened to maybe push you down a hypothetical flight of stairs after possibly drinking a bottle of Hennessy in June of 2014.
7) Find new victim--return to step 1.
I don't even care about KD like that, but don't ever let these subversive vampires darken the light of god that shines within each of us--it's their only goal in this material existence.