Lebron this Lebron that

CuzTheyKnowMe

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LOL DISNEY CHANNEL YO

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THE KING NEED SOME HOES WHERE THE HOES AT DOE
 

CuzTheyKnowMe

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the irony
you wanna know about my education? you really do? ok...

I recently graduated high school, so I want to inform you guys on how highschool will be. I know many of you are starting or started school so I want to tell you how my first day was back then!!!!

6:00 AM: Alarm clock goes off, I wake up so excited for school I try to jump out bed and hit my head on the bunk bed. It hurt but not enough to stop me, I ran to the bathroom, when I opened the door I saw my dad naked, just out the shower. I panicked and tried to run out the door but hit my head on the side and fell to the floor, passed out. I woke up to see the image of my dads balls above me as he tried to see if I was OK. Thankfully I was, I jumped back to my feet and told my dad GTFO, and he said OK. I started getting ready and stuff, and realized halfway through brushing my teeth that I was using the toothbrush that my mom uses to clean the toilets. I didn't have enough time to brush my teeth again so I said screw it, good enough. Once I changed my clothes and stuff I started watching ESPN since I had a few minutes to kill some time. They were doing top 10 plays so I pushed my luck and watched all 10, I was now late..I ran outside and saw the bus at the end of my block, so I ran as fast I could towards it, unfortunately some lady cut right in front of me at the end of the block and we both collided. She was on the floor and so was I, I saw the bus leaving so I threw her off me and ran towards the bus again..I didnt make it. Now I have to walk to school, when I finally get there im drenched in sweat and look like crap, but at least I made it on time. The second I got there I saw all the popular kids from middle school, as I walked by them hoping they would ignore me, one kid points out I have a tooth stuck in my forehead (that damn old lady) everyone including the cute girls start laughing, I was so embarrassed! Thankfully the 1st period bell rang so everyone started leaving...

1st period

Earth Science...our teacher made us all write one embarrassing thing on a piece of paper then hand it in, I didn't know she would read it out loud..most people put not so bad things or obviously fake things...when my paper was next she read my name and read "I still wet the bed and my mom has to wake me up halfway through the night so I dont piss the bed"...In that moment everyone looked at me and started laughing, I nearly cried. I ran out of class and to the bathroom and stayed their for the whole period.

2nd Period

I was still in the bathroom crying but 5 minutes into 2nd period a security officer came in and asked "WTF ARE YOU STILL DOING HERE, GET YOUR ASS TO CLASS YOU UGLY shyt"...so I had to go to class. When I got to 2nd period late, the door was locked so I had to knock,so the teacher had to open it, all the students eyes were on me. The teacher told me to pick a seat...while I was walking towards a open seat I guess a student noticed I had toilet paper on my shoes and he yelled "DONT KNOW HOW TO WIPE YOUR ASS YET DUMBfukk?"...Once again everyone started laughing, I made a ran for the door but my teacher didn't allow me. Once the class settled down, our teacher made everyone say what they did during the summer. When it came to me, the teacher said "listen im not even gonna ask, we all know you're ass stayed home all day on Y!A (he didnt say Y!A but he did say all day)...so im just gonna skip you because we dont have enough time for every story. By the time all the stories were over, so was class.

3rd Period

It was gym period, I went to the locker room and started changing, suddenly I felt my hoodie get put over my head, I tried to fight but couldnt, the kids then pulled my pants down and took a picture of my penis...then they were me in the garbage can, ass up. I was stuck like that for all of 3rd and 4th period!! (I missed math)

4th period


5th period

After screaming nonstop for help for 2 periods, I finally felt something poking at my ass, I screamed and screamed and they helped me out. After I pulled my pants up I looked up and saw who helped me, the most beautiful girl I have ever seen. She was laughing alot but I felt like she was laughing with me instead of at me..Her laugh was so cute that I instantly forgot about all the pain and was able to smile too..She then asks me "Why are you laughing?" I had no answer for her..she says "im laughing cause your small penis got sent to everyone in school"...she then walks away and calls me a loser. Its 5th period though, lunch time...time to see someone I knew from last year. Sadly no one wants to talk to me, everyone I went up to just walked away or ignored me. I went to go get the lunch and even the lunch ladies were making fun of me in Spanish. After grabbing my food I looked for a table to eat, no one would let me take a seat...So I went to the bathroom, every stall was taken besides one that had shyt all over it, but I figured it was better then nothing.

6th period

I guess the smell of shyt while eating made me sick because I couldnt stop throwing up, I went to the nurse and she just told me to throw it all up in the private bathroom and everything would be OK..she actually made me feel better but while I was in the bathroom throwing up I heard her on the phone with some guy "Yea work has been ok so far, but some retarded looking kid is throwing up all over the place, sheesh I didnt know this school had a special eds program for these types of retards"...I was so hurt, how could a nurse be so mean? I threw up all of 6th period and ended up missing Spanish..

7th period

Still in the nurses office throwing up, my dad came to pick me up. As he was driving home I started throwing up again, he stopped the car and threw me out, he told me he only picked me up cause that dumb whore nurse called and said I had to come get my retarded child. He told me walk home..Sadly I had no house keys so I had to wait till my dad got back home from work, so from 7th period (1 PM to 6 PM) I waited outside for my dad while it was raining outside, when he finally got home he said "hey at least you dont smell like shyt for once"...

I went to sleep that night and never woke up again. I hope you have a better HS freshman year then I did.
 

Higher Tech

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seriously nikka? Don't f*cking come at me like that I never try you on no shyt so don't f*cking come at me like that. I don't go around saying your stupid for your little baby ass shytty f*cking Hornets so don't come at me. Come see me in real life and call me stupid I'll beat the f*ck out OF YOUR DUMB ASS. nikkas be acting like they hard asf on the internet calling other nikkas dumb and tryna joke on nikkas for having opinions and shyt. I dont even know you personally but i bet your a little ass white boy who live in the suburbs who trys to act all hard and cool and shyt but really is a no life nikka with no friends or have anything to do outside of HN. Like get a f*cking life and realize who the f*ck you are talking to when you address me kid. ON GOD I never came at you in a disrespectful manner but you pushing it because you think you mr hot shyt cause yo f*ck ass team made it the the bottom of the playoffs and got dropped
:dead:

This entire thread is hilarious. OMG, I'm fukkin dying.
 

smitty22

Is now part of Thee Alliance. Ill die for this ish
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I'm so sick of hearing about Lebron James and how he made a dynasty in Miami, more like a Disney, they won 2 championships, not 6 or 10, and darn lucky to win that one last year, missed free-throws and they're done! James comes across the screen like he's God, he is not, he is no more than an average player in a very low-grade league! Where's the superstars for Competition?Jordan had many, Bird, Johnson, hakeem, Worthy, Thomas, Malone, Ewing, on and on, so James is merely a man playing with boys who should have stayed in college, and received some education unlike James who stutters around in that third-grade grammar rap, because he's an undergraduate of thought and reason! These kids need an education first, not money, because most end up broke and useless!
Noah this you homie? :troll:
 

jojojojo

mo-jo-jo-jo!
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Whenever I get a package of plain M&Ms, I make it my duty to continue the strength and robustness of the candy as a species. To this end, I hold M&M duels.

Taking two candies between my thumb and forefinger, I apply pressure, squeezing them together until one of them cracks and splinters. That is the "loser," and I eat the inferior one immediately. The winner gets to go another round.

I have found that, in general, the brown and red M&Ms are tougher, and the newer blue ones are genetically inferior. I have hypothesized that the blue M&Ms as a race cannot survive long in the intense theater of competition that is the modern candy and snack-food world.

Occasionally I will get a mutation, a candy that is misshapen, or pointier, or flatter than the rest. Almost invariably this proves to be a weakness, but on very rare occasions it gives the candy extra strength. In this way, the species continues to adapt to its environment.

When I reach the end of the pack, I am left with one M&M, the strongest of the herd. Since it would make no sense to eat this one as well, I pack it neatly in an envelope and send it to M&M Mars, A Division of Mars, Inc., Hackettstown, NJ 17840-1503 U.S.A., along with a 3x5 card reading, "Please use this M&M for breeding purposes."

This week they wrote back to thank me, and sent me a coupon for a free 1/2 pound bag of plain M&Ms. I consider this "grant money." I have set aside the weekend for a grand tournament. From a field of hundreds, we will discover the True Champion.

There can be only one and Lebron is NOT an M&M
 

CuzTheyKnowMe

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Whenever I get a package of plain M&Ms, I make it my duty to continue the strength and robustness of the candy as a species. To this end, I hold M&M duels.

Taking two candies between my thumb and forefinger, I apply pressure, squeezing them together until one of them cracks and splinters. That is the "loser," and I eat the inferior one immediately. The winner gets to go another round.

I have found that, in general, the brown and red M&Ms are tougher, and the newer blue ones are genetically inferior. I have hypothesized that the blue M&Ms as a race cannot survive long in the intense theater of competition that is the modern candy and snack-food world.

Occasionally I will get a mutation, a candy that is misshapen, or pointier, or flatter than the rest. Almost invariably this proves to be a weakness, but on very rare occasions it gives the candy extra strength. In this way, the species continues to adapt to its environment.

When I reach the end of the pack, I am left with one M&M, the strongest of the herd. Since it would make no sense to eat this one as well, I pack it neatly in an envelope and send it to M&M Mars, A Division of Mars, Inc., Hackettstown, NJ 17840-1503 U.S.A., along with a 3x5 card reading, "Please use this M&M for breeding purposes."

This week they wrote back to thank me, and sent me a coupon for a free 1/2 pound bag of plain M&Ms. I consider this "grant money." I have set aside the weekend for a grand tournament. From a field of hundreds, we will discover the True Champion.

There can be only one and Lebron is NOT an M&M
:wow: this reminds me of a story that is very near and dear to my heart

This wasn't my first date or anything, but it was my first date with THIS girl, let me explain how it all went down.

I was walking towards my house and I saw some girl trying to carry a big box from her car to her building, usually this is the time I cross the street so I don't have to help. However, I noticed this girl was fine as hell, so I went to go help her. I went up to her and said " DAYUM BABY Do you work at subway cause you just gave me a footlong?" she gave me a little smile..then I asked her if she needed help, she said sure (I knew I was going to get some puss tonight) ... Anyway I took the box from car and as I walking up the stairs to go to the lobby, my pants started falling. The box was too heavy for me lift with only one hand pick my pants up with the other, but I could NOT allow her to see my underwear, they were white but with a huge shyt stain in the back. So I thought the best thing to do was pretend to pull a muscle, which worked but I accidentally dropped the box and it fell straight towards her, she tried to avoid it but ended up getting crushed by it and she fell down 6 flights. At first I couldn't stop laughing but then I realized I had to help her, by the time I got up there she was already standing up, pissed cause she fell, everything in the box broke and because I was laughing...I asked if I could take her on for dinner to make it up to her, she said NO, (usually this is when I do the Skyhook and don't take no for an answer) but instead I just asked again in a cute way, she finally said yes. At around 8 PM I went to go pick up, (sadly forgot to take a shower or change so that shyt stain was still there)..she asked me where my car was, I told her straight up, [expletive deleted] we aint taking my car, gas prices are way too high, we either taking your car or walking...she said fine we will take her car. I told her I would drive because I have the same amount of faith in a woman driving then I do in Ray Charles driving. I took her to some fancy restaurant, really high class..I decided to be nice today and told her I would say her order when we go to drive-thru, but if she order off the dollar menu shes paying. It came out to be $10.43...so I went through her cup holder trying to get as much change as I could get..only found 3 dollars in quarters..poor ho. I stopped in the parking lot to watch the sunset while we ate, it was amazing besides for that homeless man throwing up in the garbage can right next to her window. After we ate I started to driver her home, but we got a flat tire. I was pissed, I couldn't believe it was a flat tire. What was worse is that it just started pouring rain...now she was going to get all wet while she changed her flat tire (not my car not my problem to fix)...then she comes back in the car dripping in water, I was so annoyed, she smelled like crap because of it. So she finally fixed her tire, I started driving again towards her house. When I finally got there I pulled up to front and asked if I could come in, she said sure. When I got inside, I had to take such a heavy shyt, I went to her bathroom and the toilet started overflowing. I really didn't want to tell her, so I just closed the bathroom door and went to the living room like nothing happened. She was still in her bedroom changing her outfit since he was still so wet (DO NOT READ THIS IF U R UNDER 18); if all goes well, it won't be the last time she gets wet tonight, OK YOU CAN READ AGAIN) So she finally comes out in a baggy t-shirt and sweats...I told her straight up, [expletive deleted] you look like trash. She got mad at me and told me GTFO, I said OK.
 

CuzTheyKnowMe

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we gotta get this nikka outta here
why do you hatin ass nikkas want me out?

i just wanna share my wisdom with the forum

All you nikkas want to E-beef and shyt, let me tell you guys a story, to allow your mind to cum through your eyes as you read this.

I woke up at 9 AM to the sound of my Dad beating my sister with a iron. I quickly got up and pushed my dad away since he was blocking the way to the bathroom. I wasnt paying attention too well and when I went to go sit on the toilet I didnt notice the lid was up so I fell in. I was literally stuck and couldn't move. After about 15 mins of me screaing for help, my dad finally came and said he just thought all tht noise was me jerking off. He tried to get me out but I was stuck, whats worse is everytime he tried to pull me up my dihaerra would hit me hard, worse each time. After a while I was just soaking in shyt, I decided to flush the toilet and I feel like I lost my ass-hole virginity again..eventually my Dad stopped his drinking and called the fire department, they came in a hurry and helped me out. Sadly my sister told News 12 so they were there to record the whole thing. The big strong fireman all helped me out and I had my a$$hole inspected by the doctors infront of everyone, once again caught on the news. This whole process took 6 hours, so I took a shower and got ready for work. It was about 4:15 and I was late, my boss asked me what happened, why was I so late...at the end of me saying the whole story he says "Yea thats what I thought cause I saw your little penis on TV" At that moment my vid came back up on TV and a hot girl and her parents came in to eat, so she saw my little pecker as well, but her parents didn't. I saw the girl keep looking at me and laughing and laughing, I was starting to get pissed. Her dad was a nice guy though, he kept calling me over and talking to me. Then one of my managers yelled at me and was like "WTF you ugly little shyt, stop talking to the customers so much, you got work to do ass clown". So I was like NIKKA who is you talking to you...but he was already 10 steps away by then. Of course this guy with a hot daughter keeps calling me over, eventually she starts talking to me and when her dad went to the bathroom she was flirting with me so much. When her dad came back, he was being so annoying as usual and a huge cock block. (not literally, my cock is small) He started asking me how to say certian stuff in my language, afterawhile I was so tired of telling him it, I started telling him curses. He asked me how to say "Hi how are you doing, Nice to meet you"...so I told him in Albanian " I want to [expletive deleted] your daugher so bad"...Luckliy enough a table of an Albanian dad and daughter came in, So when the guy overhead the two Albanians talking, he went up to them and thinks he told the guy "Hi how are you doing, nice to meet you"..but me, the father and his daughter know what he really said. So the girl is stunned and surpried a man would come up and say that to her dad. The father then gets up and stabs the man in the eye with a knife. He continues to hit him across the face with a plate, eventually the others waiters came and pushed me out the way while i was cheering. Once the police came I noticed the officer who gave me that one DUI ticket for driving a car backwards @ a McDonalds driv thru. We were talking and laughing..good guy. Anyway once the Albanian father explained his side of the story and the other guys daughter explains their side, all eyes are on me. I simply told him he must have heard me wrong, but the 2 statements sound completely different. Techincally I couldnt get arrested for that but at that moment I knew my chances of [expletive deleted] his daughter wasnt looking too good. Her mother went in the amublance with her husband on the way to the hospital. The daugher was alone and needed a ride, I offered to give her a ride. Being like most women, she was a gold digging whore and accepted. While she was in the bathroom getting ready to leave, I went up to the Albanian daugher and asked for some digits. I also threw in a joke about me wanting to [expletive deleted] her, like the guy with 1 eye said. She didnt laugh cause she knew her dad would go to jail for a long time, but so did smirk. Anyway, she went with her father to the police station so I couldnt do anything with her. As I was about to leave the other girl, my boss was liek WTF do you think you're doing? you can't leave, beating or not you still work for 3 more hours, I was like NIKKA YOU DONT KNOW ME, I WILL WRECK YOU, (but what I really said was, ok). So I made that girl wait in my car while I cleaned up in the back. She was in there for 3 hours while I was working..Anyway just as I was about to leave, I saw a naked russian man running through the streets, so I told my boss to stop staring at his [expletive deleted], phegget. My boss was like WTF nikka is you serious? I was like JK see you tomorrow, he said ok. Then as I was leaving I tripped and knocked his laptop on the floor, I dislocated my shoulder and he fired me. I went to my car pissed off, and I see the girl still waiting for me in my car, I told her GTFO. She said ok. Then I dorve home and thought, let me tell the Pheggets of the coli this story.
 
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