Lets talk about relationships, for real.

[Miss Lucifer's Love]

no matter if it's completely the other person's fault.. you can get married... her not work... her fukk 150 men... her slap your mom.. her beat your kids... her spit directly in your face

and she STILL getting half your shyt.... and probably the kids and some child support too

But why would you marry a jobless, cheating, disrespectful, abusive woman like that in the first place?

#CBB

 

[freetroit]

What's up with all the whining abd complaining once your married?

Im GMB but my mentality is that the way you love the person while dating should remain the same while married

Be the overall same person throughout your marriage and their should be minimal complaints

Ladies dont change

Men dont change

What is the fukking problem with just being consistent

If i ever get married im doing it because i am satisfied witj my wife as she is. As long as she maintains that im good

I would expect my wife to marry me because she is satisfied witj the way i treat her as long as im consistent there should be minimal issues



Why cant this relationship business be this simple

 

[42 Monks]

People don't know what they want

So many are tied up in the status of "marriage" while not even knowing what a healthy relationship for them is. Trifling. All the important stuff they want to figure out later or let someone walk through their minefield of hidden baggage to figure out - What makes them happy. What kind of communication/affirmation they need. Etc.

But damnnnn that ring I need it so bad Naw. Trust - figure yourself out and learn to be happy with you instead of going out there trying to find someone to complete you or make you whole or whatever the fukk Disney taught you growing up. Anyone, male or female, that says "I cant be alone" shouldn't be dating at all. Get your shyt together THEN go out. How you gonna introduce yourself to someone and you don't even know who you are?

As for #GMB Government shouldn't be involved in your relationships. If you got kids? Cool. Do it for them - they'll actually directly benefit from it. Those kids are gonna tie you together better than a ring ever will most likely.

 

[Miss Lucifer's Love]

What's up with all the whining abd complaining once your married?

Im GMB but my mentality is that the way you love the person while dating should remain the same while married

Be the overall same person throughout your marriage and their should be minimal complaints

Ladies dont change

Men dont change

What is the fukking problem with just being consistent

If i ever get married im doing it because i am satisfied witj my wife as she is. As long as she maintains that im good

I would expect my wife to marry me because she is satisfied witj the way i treat her as long as im consistent there should be minimal issues



Why cant this relationship business be this simple

Because relationships between human beings are not simple. We are people, not robots.

This is a big part of the problem. We think things are always supposed to stay the same. But the world doesn't work like that People don't work like that.

I am definitely not the same person at 33 that I was at 23 -- thank god. I have different priorities, I've have more life experience that's changed my opinion on things, I found new ways of doing things, I've given up old habits, I've created new habits, etc. My husband has gone through the same kinds of changes. People do change. And if you're with the right person they will help you become a better version of yourself.

Those little inconsistencies can serve as lessons and help you deal with things better in the future. But if your while mindset is "just stay consistent" then you can't grow.

My husband loved who I was when I met him at 19, but he is even more thrilled with the person I've become.

 

[42 Monks]

What's up with all the whining abd complaining once your married?

Im GMB but my mentality is that the way you love the person while dating should remain the same while married

Be the overall same person throughout your marriage and their should be minimal complaints

Ladies dont change

Men dont change

What is the fukking problem with just being consistent

If i ever get married im doing it because i am satisfied witj my wife as she is. As long as she maintains that im good

I would expect my wife to marry me because she is satisfied witj the way i treat her as long as im consistent there should be minimal issues



Why cant this relationship business be this simple

Breh, if there is no difference between you at 16, 26, and 30 then you been living life blind and lost. People grow. You'd like to grow alongside the people you love but that's not how shyt always goes. Doesn't need to be anything grimey either for two people that actually do gel to split. Growing apart can mean all kinds of stuff.

 

[freetroit]

Dont get married till your fully grown

Dont get married at 16 then

Im just saying if you were never really super romantic why should your wife expect you to become prince charming all of a sudden

If your wife fukked and sucked you on a regular basis why should she stop just because she got married to you

Im talking about the basic shyt i hear people in marriages whining about im just like damn

Just be consistent with what got you married in the first place

 

[42 Monks]

Dont get married till your fully grown

Dont get married at 16 then

Im just saying if you were never really super romantic why should your wife expect you to become prince charming all of a sudden

If your wife fukked and sucked you on a regular basis why should she stop just because she got married to you

Im talking about the basic shyt i hear people in marriages whining about im just like damn

Just be consistent with what got you married in the first place

"Fully grown" ask a man at any time in his life after high school and he'll tell you that he's "Fully grown"

You never stop growing up, man. And it happens in spurts too. You may see life the same way for 2 years, then you see a friend die and you age a decade in one night. You may think you found the one then when it goes south you run through 10 strippers in a month. Life isn't set at any point in your life, nor anyone else's.

The shyt you love about someone at one point may be what you can't stand about them later.

 

[freetroit]

If everyone is always growing always changing

Hence GMB

Marriage is a binding contract with rules and boundaries that must be adhered to for life

Seems like op inquiry has been answered

No need for getting married because you or your partner will change and want something new it seems

Relationships should be seen as fluid anf ever changing like water

Flowing through your life one after the other

No neef for contracts that you inherently will break due to constantly changing and growing

GMB is the answer

 

[Miss Lucifer's Love]

So many are tied up in the status of "marriage" while not even knowing what a healthy relationship for them is. Trifling. All the important stuff they want to figure out later or let someone walk through their minefield of hidden baggage to figure out - What makes them happy. What kind of communication/affirmation they need. Etc.

But damnnnn that ring I need it so bad Naw.

I think people view marriage as an inevitable next step in a relationship, like going from middle school to high school. But it's more like getting your PhD. It's not mandatory, it's not for everyone, and if you do decide to go that route you have a lot of hard work ahead.

 

[42 Monks]

I think people view marriage as an inevitable next step in a relationship, like going from middle school to high school. But it's more like getting your PhD. It's not mandatory, it's not for everyone, and if you do decide to go that route you have a lot of hard work ahead.

shyt is rough. But I'll be straight up and say that I've probably been in more serious relationships than most of my friends who've been or are married. Real bad luck though.

There's nothing like a great relationship. Nothing. When I came back down to Earth again, I didn't even want to date anymore. shyt feels like work. Having that amazing connection with someone then having to start from scratch with someone new?

There ain't a help hotline for that shyt

Relation 'steps' fukk people up too though. Maybe you never need to meet the parents. Maybe you smash on the 6th date instead of the 2nd. Maybe yal have more fun acknowledging each other's space early in the game instead of late. You gotta manage the flow as it is.

 

[The Devil's Advocate]

But why would you marry a jobless, cheating, disrespectful, abusive woman like that in the first place?

#CBB

That was the extreme. Making the point that no matter what she does. She's getting half

There's plenty of people who truly believe they found the love of their life. And it doesn't work. Like many relationships you have in life

Only this time, it costs you half of everything. No matter if you just fall out of love. Grow apart. Or something major like cheating or abuse

People change over 50 years plus. You staking your life on this person. And men ain't getting the same breaks at the end

 

[Jesus Shuttlesworth]

nikkas need to stop wifing hoes.
But nikkas need to stop creating hoes too.

And round and round we go...

 

[42 Monks]

nikkas need to stop wifing hoes.
But nikkas need to stop creating hoes too.

And round and round we go...

Guilty of this. I was that dude that was so good at saying the perfect thing to a girl to set her on that path to destruction

I'll never forget this girl from high school. I just went to college, but kept in contact with her because she was real as fukk. Down ass girl that would've done anything for me. Anything. I knew I had something special, but being a young dumbass that was surrounded by HBCU dimes for the first time.... I did NOT value that love at all . She tells me one day that she wants to catch up with me when I come back home on the break, "I know you've been busy but I still want to see you "

Poor girl.

She wondered why I never hit her up that trip. Literally told her "I don't want to be the one who takes your virginity. I want you to go out and do you. Learn how you like to live"

.....I fukked that girl's whole life up with that shyt

Her friend told me she cried on and off randomly in class for a week after I dropped that on her. She called me a month later asking me if it was okay to date this guy from my old hs team. I said "Sure, he's a great kid " mind you he was only a year younger than me. Just invalidated his whole status for life. Of course he hits me up through a friend an entire year later and says "you know she still loves you right? "



So yeah. I had to get better about what I say to people



that's definitely true

 

[Miss Lucifer's Love]

If everyone is always growing always changing

Hence GMB

Marriage is a binding contract with rules and boundaries that must be adhered to for life

Seems like op inquiry has been answered

No need for getting married because you or your partner will change and want something new it seems

Relationships should be seen as fluid anf ever changing like water

Flowing through your life one after the other

No neef for contracts that you inherently will break due to constantly changing and growing

GMB is the answer

But you and your spouse are the ones who create the rules and boundaries, and you can (and should!) make changes to the contract as time goes on. You change, and your marriage evolves with you. But if you find yourself wanting something completely new and no longer want your spouse, then you didn't chose well in the first place. No need for GMB if you follow CBB.

That was the extreme. Making the point that no matter what she does. She's getting half

There's plenty of people who truly believe they found the love of their life. And it doesn't work. Like many relationships you have in life

Only this time, it costs you half of everything. No matter if you just fall out of love. Grow apart. Or something major like cheating or abuse

People change over 50 years plus. You staking your life on this person. And men ain't getting the same breaks at the end

Marriage creates a single entity (legally, spiritually,emotionally) so she's getting half of the 100% you both created when you got married. That's why you have to choose wisely. Really get to know people and don't settle. Saying marriage doesn't work because so many people are bad at choosing doesn't make sense.

People don't take marriage seriously enough. I don't think you should be able to get divorced unless there's abuse, addictions, shyt like that.
You're "not happy" anymore?
She's a nag who's always complaining about dumb shyt?
He keeps cheating on you?


choose better brehs