Long Distance Relationships

[Sad Bunny]

As soon as Spring rolls around
I'ma be at the airport wearing a full Tru Religion fit with no shirt underneath, letting that yellow-skin gleam in the Chi-Town sun like a highlighter

The Coli is too much sometimes

Take pics for us @Token

 

[Token]

As soon as Spring rolls around
I'ma be at the airport wearing a full Tru Religion fit with no shirt underneath, letting that yellow-skin gleam in the Chi-Town sun like a highlighter

My beige knight. Don't stunt too hard tho, nikkas be hating.

The Coli is too much sometimes

Take pics for us @Token

I gotchu.

 

[threattonature]

no one cheats like a army wife with her man on deployment

I knew one girl who had three dudes get deployed on her. Each time she met a new man and moved in with him before the old one got back. She was fine as fukk too.

 

[threattonature]

As far as the thread it's doable but can't be for too long. I was in one over the course of like five years. Girl was supposed to move with me soon as I graduated college and got a decent job. For two years after I got the job there was one excuse after another for why she wouldn't move. Eventually came out she was in another relationship for those two years and probably others before that. Only reason I was trying to make it work was due to having children together.

To make it work you have to go overboard on the communication. Eventually jealousy will kick in no matter who you are. The longer the long distance the relationship goes the harder it is for both sides to be trusting and in turn faithful. Like others have said you have to have an end game in mind.

Always said I would never do one again. Met a girl though while traveling for work that had me considering it.

 

[DuncanWebayama]

this is definetly our song

 

[Mr Uncle Leroy]

No shyt her white ass got fukked by a black pro soccer player in Peru when she was in the corps and she's out the corps about to travel South America in hopes of getting fukked in brazil cuz she's not attracted to Peruvians..she told me all this..and I've fukked other girls since then..we broke up dumb ass but we're still friends..

was it before/after yall broke up?

1. Yes. I live in Philly and she lived in Toronto.

2. I believe they can work with the right people

3. There's several factors:

- Two mature people who are serious about each other-this is needed because dating someone long distance is an undertaking in itself...not something for a casual situation

- A lot of communication-I had better communication with this woman than any woman I've dated in my city. We talked throughout the day, everyday. We talked during our morning rush hour every morning in traffic(we both started work at the same time), we texted throughout the day and Skyped every night. It felt like we lived close...we spoke to each other more than anybody else each day

- A consistent schedule-we spent every other weekend with each other. Also, long weekends and holidays. So, at least two weekends a month. People in these kinds of relationships need to make a schedule and hold each other to it because face time is at a premium.

- Disposable Income-consistent traveling is expensive, especially if you're dating someone that you can't just drive to in a 2-3 hours. Obviously, Philly and Toronto are not very close, but they're not extremely far either. About a 7 hour drive. I mostly flew or took an overnight bus, and she did the same...more flying for her though. Plus, its best to find travel deals and book ahead. Having a schedule comes into play here again because knowing what days to plan ahead for can save money. Trying to travel last minute is expensive.

I actually had a lot of fun during this long distance relationship. Due to our communication patterns, it didn't feel long distance since she was such a big part of my day. Plus, we both liked to travel, so that was cool for both of us. Not to mention, it felt like an adventure each weekend because we were both spending time away from home, yet, over time, each city became like a home away from home for each of us. We kept clothes at each other's place, so that cut down on the packing and we were tour guides for each other in our respective cities.

In reality, I don't think long distance relationships are really that much different than in-city relationships. Think about it...two young professionals are going to be busy most days during the week. And unless you live together, most of the time spent together will be on the weekends. No different than a long distance relationship in practice.

Peace

yall still together? what happened?

 

[mcdivit85]

yall still together? what happened?

We're no longer together. We were together for about a year. However, I wasn't the best boyfriend since I had her in Toronto and another girlfriend in my city...yea, pulling double duty. This, obviously, caused a wrench. She was pretty hurt by that since we were making serious plans for one of us to eventually move and to be together in either America or Toronto. If I could take some things back, I definitely would.

She was applying for jobs here in Philly and looking to get a visa while also looking for the same for me in Toronto. I would've moved if I had found an equal job in Toronto or the surrounding GTA before our relationship ended. I really grew to like the Toronto area and I may still move to the city.

Either way, I really enjoyed our relationship, and I know that long distance can work. As long as it the things I mentioned are there. But its no easy task regardless.

Peace

 

[tru_m.a.c]

Have you been in one?

Do you believe in them?

What's the key in order for them to actually work?

I find that people have such varying opinions on this topic...just curious what most of you think. I know people who have had great experiences (leading to marriage etc) and some bad ones as well (just like in regular relationships, of course).

1. Yes

2. Yeah, they're really not difficult

3. Communication. Trust. Honesty.

The way I look at it, most folks shouldn't be in relationships as is. They just don't have the personality for it. They don't understand the concept. Their not at the right place in life to manage it. They get in the relationship "just cause." You really have to assess those variables before you even talk about being in a relationship with someone.

I was in a long distance relationship where we were separated by 12+ hours and a time zone. College sweetheart, so we tried to make it work when she went to vet school and I entered the workforce. When we were in school, I never saw her until 10 maybe 12 at night. My people in frats/sororities know why. She was always in her books, and we were both night owls, so our schedules synced.

When we graduated, Skype/facetime kept everything running smoothly. I was a traveling consultant at the time. So I'm flying out to a client Monday, and then flying to see her Thursday night. I'd try and see her twice a month. So nothing was really different.

To this day, I have no sympathy for folks who get into failed local relationships. That's just laugh out loud type wack to me. Every resource is at your disposal 24/7 to make the relationship work. Same shyt for you folks talking about 3hrs make it long distance. Stop it lol. That's not distance. That's 3 Madden games. That's a workout at the gym, a shower and a post workout meal. That's 1 NFL game.

 

[mcdivit85]

1. Yes

2. Yeah, they're really not difficult

3. Communication. Trust. Honesty.

The way I look at it, most folks shouldn't be in relationships as is. They just don't have the personality for it. They don't understand the concept. Their not at the right place in life to manage it. They get in the relationship "just cause." You really have to assess those variables before you even talk about being in a relationship with someone.

I was in a long distance relationship where we were separated by 12+ hours and a time zone. College sweetheart, so we tried to make it work when she went to vet school and I entered the workforce. When we were in school, I never saw her until 10 maybe 12 at night. My people in frats/sororities know why. She was always in her books, and we were both night owls, so our schedules synced.

When we graduated, Skype/facetime kept everything running smoothly. I was a traveling consultant at the time. So I'm flying out to a client Monday, and then flying to see her Thursday night. I'd try and see her twice a month. So nothing was really different.

To this day, I have no sympathy for folks who get into failed local relationships. That's just laugh out loud type wack to me. Every resource is at your disposal 24/7 to make the relationship work. Same shyt for you folks talking about 3hrs make it long distance. Stop it lol. That's not distance. That's 3 Madden games. That's a workout at the gym, a shower and a post workout meal. That's 1 NFL game.

Exactly. I laugh at some of these responses talking about 1 or 2 hours away is a long distance relationship. Hell, if you live in a major city, you probably drive 1 hour to and from work everyday during rush hour traffic...that's two hours right there. Its nothing to get in your car on a Friday after work and drive from Philly to DC, which is about 2 hours. People think that's tough? No wonder people think relationships are hard.

Its hard to leave straight from work on Friday, put some music on and drive 2-3 hours to see someone you supposedly love? The same thing you would do if you were going to some big party or some concert or going to the beach during the summer? People kill me.

Like you said, its not so much the distance, but simply that most people aren't ready for relationships period. A serious, committed relationship is the pre-cursor to marriage, which is is/should be a selfless endeavor where the needs of your partner outweigh your own. However, the reality is, most people think of their own desires and needs first and hope their partner molds to fit them instead of thinking of how they can be the best partner to the other person. So, either way, that relationship is going to fail whether they live 20 minutes away or 20 hours away.

I've made mistakes in past relationships both local and long distance, but it wasn't because the relationship was hard. It was because I made non-relationship choices while in a relationship. Relationships aren't hard...people are hard-headed and try to find ways to live the single life while supposedly dating someone seriously. People makes relationships, local and long distance, harder than what they need be.

If you have two people that CHOOSE to make it work, then it will work. If not, it won't. The same people who have trouble dating someone who is 1 hour away will have the same issues dating someone who's next door.

Peace

 

[tru_m.a.c]

Exactly. I laugh at some of these responses talking about 1 or 2 hours away is a long distance relationship. Hell, if you live in a major city, you probably drive 1 hour to and from work everyday during rush hour traffic...that's two hours right there. Its nothing to get in your car on a Friday after work and drive from Philly to DC, which is about 2 hours. People think that's tough? No wonder people think relationships are hard.

Its hard to leave straight from work on Friday, put some music on and drive 2-3 hours to see someone you supposedly love? The same thing you would do if you were going to some big party or some concert or going to the beach during the summer? People kill me.

Like you said, its not so much the distance, but simply that most people aren't ready for relationships period. A serious, committed relationship is the pre-cursor to marriage, which is is/should be a selfless endeavor where the needs of your partner outweigh your own. However, the reality is, most people think of their own desires and needs first and hope their partner molds to fit them instead of thinking of how they can be the best partner to the other person. So, either way, that relationship is going to fail whether they live 20 minutes away or 20 hours away.

I've made mistakes in past relationships both local and long distance, but it wasn't because the relationship was hard. It was because I made non-relationship choices while in a relationship. Relationships aren't hard...people are hard-headed and try to find ways to live the single life while supposedly dating someone seriously. People makes relationships, local and long distance, harder than what they need be.

If you have two people that CHOOSE to make it work, then it will work. If not, it won't. The same people who have trouble dating someone who is 1 hour away will have the same issues dating someone who's next door.

Peace

Dead ass word for word what I was going to write! I was even gonna compare the 2hr commute from Philly to NY (because that's our respective hometowns).

Folks just don't have realistic expectations man. Their idea of hard is not being able to cuddle on Wednesday night lol. When you can't depend on make up sex and dates to keep the relationship alive, you really start to view things differently.

 

[saint25225]

.

 

[IronFist]

I have in the past ironically mainly if i was in the south, the long distance relationship occurred in another state (Texas, Florida) or out west in Sacramento normally opposing areas....even Diego was an option, ill touch on this more in a bit.

 

[Dwolf]

Have you been in one?

Do you believe in them?

What's the key in order for them to actually work?

I find that people have such varying opinions on this topic...just curious what most of you think. I know people who have had great experiences (leading to marriage etc) and some bad ones as well (just like in regular relationships, of course).

Trying to tell us something...

 

[Desirous]

Trying to tell us something...

You wanna share your story with us? Have a seat

 

[The Mad Titan]

Ironically enough the one long distance relationship I was in was probably the best, realist and the one I most deeply connected with. I also trust her the most out of all of my ex's, fell in love with her the quickest, and popped the question.


When I say Long distance I mean more than 15 hours distance....